


Eosphora

by BenSomeday



Series: A Twisted Time-Travel AU [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Badass Ben, Badass Rey, Ben and Rey are idiots, Ben can't remember, F/M, Maybe - Freeform, Mechanic Rey (Star Wars), Neither can Rey, Prince Ben Solo, The Force knows what it's doing, they fight like an old married couple
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:14:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 42,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26954170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BenSomeday/pseuds/BenSomeday
Summary: Anakin and his family may have changed the past and the future but that doesn't mean everything is sunshine and rainbows. Ben can't remember the previous timeline and Anakin fears what this might mean for the Dyad.Meanwhile, Resistance Hero Ben Solo finds himself at the mercy of one very irritating Force sensitive and he can't decide if he wants to push her out of an airlock or kiss her silly.Rey just wants to know why galaxy-famous Ben Solo makes her feel like she's home for the first time since she was a child.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Series: A Twisted Time-Travel AU [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1815751
Comments: 82
Kudos: 134





	1. Red Alert

**Author's Note:**

> I am not going to promise fast updates on this. Fall is one of my busiest times at work (which makes no sense in my industry but there you go) so I will likely be slow to get this completed just because I will be exhausted for a while. I will, however, not leave this undone. It will be completed and I will have it completely uploaded by the end of the year, come hell or high water.
> 
> Also, thank you for reading!

The blaring of the proximity alarm in the cockpit was so distracting, Ben nearly missed the TIEs swinging around and heading back to his position. He slammed his fist against the control panel and the screeching ceased. The resulting silence pressed against his eardrums like a vacuum for a moment, almost making him wonder if he had lost his hearing. Sound rushed back in seconds later and he refocused his attention on the squadron of First Order fighters that had been tailing him since he had passed Cerea on his way back to Ahch-To from Endor. The group, originally consisting of nearly thirty fighters, had been reduced to just under ten. Nearly an hour of strategic evasive maneuvers had ended in a majority of the enemy fighters unable to escape the volley of firepower Ben unleashed on them as he swung around a randomly passing asteroid and came back into their sitelines shooting.

“Hold on baby,” he muttered to his ship. “We’ve gotta get rid of these guys. We’ll find a place to land once they’re gone.”

Ben’s ship had been specially designed by him to resemble the sleek lines and sharp edges of the First Order TIEs, which he insisted would help confuse the enemy while fighting. His mother had, strangely, raised her eyebrow at him and muttered something about some things never changing. When she asked him, an odd waver in her tone, if he had named his ship Silencer, Ben had been startled but replied that even though he had considered the name, he was calling it the Phantom. Leia had been somewhat mollified by that, though he couldn’t really fathom why the name of his fighter mattered so much. Regardless, the shots he had taken during the first half hour of the attack had left his ship with too much damage to make it back to his grandfather’s base on Ahch-To.

“Kriff!” Ben shouted as another TIE pulled up on his aft side, flanked quickly by two of his buddies. He sent his ship into a barrel roll to put some distance between himself and the TIEs. “You bastards sure are persistent, I’ll give you that. All right, let’s see if you like this.”

Ben shifted until he was sitting full back in his seat, spreading his legs and tensing his core. He pulled back on the throttle as he closed his eyes and reached out to the Force. He twisted his hand sharply, pushing his fighter faster and faster, aiming directly for the group TIEs bobbing and weaving their way into shooting range. The other four TIEs moved into position on either side of the five gunning toward Ben, preparing to shoot. At the last second, Ben’s eyes flew open and he hit the thrust, jerked both arms on the steering column and shot up in a perfect, perpendicular line above the TIEs. He released the throttle and pulled back, shutting off the already malfunctioning stabilizer, then, twisting into the forced fall, he began to fire.

In the end, only one TIE remained and the pilot apparently decided to take his chances with his commander at the First Order rather than continue to pursue Ben because he turned tail and tried to retreat. Unfortunately for that First Order pilot, Ben couldn’t allow anyone outside of his grandfather and Uncle Luke to know he had been anywhere near Endor. Ben put his sights on the TIE and fired, watching sadly as the fighter exploded and closing his eyes in remorse when the life of the pilot snuffed out.

The thing about being as Force sensitive as Ben was while fighting a war? You could feel it, every time you took a life and Ben wasn’t able to numb himself to it. He refused to, honestly. The moment he stopped caring about the lives of his enemies was the moment he became as cold and heartless as them. He muttered a quick but sincere plea to the Force to let the pilots he had just killed rest in peace.

Ben sighed, then groaned, as the alarms started up again. This time, however, they weren’t just warnings but full Red Alerts. He moved quickly to check the status of the life support system and the fuel, then pulled up a map of the quadrant he was in, hoping there was a planet nearby that he could safely land on. The closest one in the vicinity was both intriguing and the surest way to have his mother boxing his ears.

Leia had prohibited Ben from ever setting foot on that planet, long before he ever piloted his own ship. Though Han had argued in defense of the planet as a good place to find help when you needed to keep your business quiet, Leia was adamant that her “baby boy” would never go anywhere near the pirates, grifters and derelicts that frequented Maz’s castle. Ben had never met the little pirate queen but his father had certainly told him enough stories to have Ben considering risking his mother’s wrath. In the end, it was the oxygen regulator beginning to fail that had Ben plotting his course and limping slowly toward Takodana.

*****

The rich green of the planet made Ben feel a strange sense of longing and the closer he got, the more nostalgic he felt. It was odd in a way that had him wondering if his family, had they been with him now, might have cast those expectant looks that they so-often used to give him whenever he went somewhere new. It was as though they were waiting for something. What, he did not know. A shiver of sheer deja vu worked its way up his spine, a prickle of awareness that had even the Force wiggling around him in anticipation. It made Ben both excited and wary of what awaited him on the Leia-forbidden planet.

Entering atmo, Ben struggled to overcome the malfunctioning stabilizer and slowly steered his ship past a scraggly mountain range, over a massive lake and down around a copse of trees a good several hundred yards behind the large stone castle resting on the lakeshore. He ran a few more last-minute diagnostics and, assured that he would be able to restart the ship if he powered it down, did just that. Grabbing his rucksack and checking to ensure his lightsaber was still affixed firmly to his belt under his jacket, he jumped down from the Phantom and made the half-mile trek toward Maz’s.

Though the temperature on Takodana was generally cool, there was a humidity from the lake that had Ben sweating by the time he made it to the castle. He took a moment to wipe his brow and adjust his pack and then stepped inside. The castle was chilly and the air dry and Ben had to wait for his eyes to adjust to the darkness after nearly half an hour in the bright sunlight. Once he could see, he moved through the entry hall and down the short flight of stairs into the main room.

“Ben Solo!”

The high, sharp call startled him and he winced. So much for a quiet, discrete visit. Depending on how lax Maz was with who she allowed into her stronghold, the First Order might know his location very soon. Still, he had no choice. His ship would not be able to get back out of atmo, let alone get him to safety elsewhere, without some serious repairs. Resigned, he lifted his hand in an awkward wave toward the tiny female making her way toward him, her large eyes staring at him with a keen look of recognition.

“Well?” She said once she reached him and Ben had the urge to squirm in her presence. “I can’t imagine the son of Han Solo is here just for a polite visit. I assume you need something. Desperately.” She adjusted the goggles on the top of her head and turned away, waving at him to follow. “Let’s get to it.”

Ben quirked a grin at her back and followed her to a low table near the bar. His father hadn’t been wrong when he had called Maz, Leia’s kindred spirit. She was a tough old bird who didn’t put up with anyone’s nonsense, Ben could already tell.

“All right then, kiddo,” Maz said, shuffling up into the chair across from him. “What is so important that you had to go and break your dear mama’s heart?”

Ben blinked in surprise.

“You knew mom forbade me from coming here?” He asked.

Maz hummed.

“Of course I knew,” she groused, “not that I like it but I couldn’t blame her. Your parents, and especially your father, have made more than their fair share of enemies over the years. The target on your back is enormous, just by nature of being their son. And your grandfather! Oof.” Maz sat back on her heels in her seat. “Both of your grandparents, really. I tell you what, kiddo, you’ve got a pedigree that half the galaxy loves and the other half loathes with the fire of a billion suns.”

That came as no shock to Ben. He knew very well the danger he was in just in being _him_. He also knew that his stubborn inability to give up and give in was inherited from every single member of his family, blood or not as in the case of his adopted uncles: Obi-Wan and Chewy and Lando.

“I know,” he answered, finally, “but I am a Solo and a Skywalker and a Naberrie, we don’t cower and we don’t hide.”

Maz looked supremely satisfied with his response. She grinned at him and motioned for him to continue.

“I need my ship repaired,” he said, then cringed at his next thought “or, if that isn’t possible, a new ship.”

Maz waved her hand at him as if to dispel the awful notion of abandoning his ship from his head.

“No need for a new ship,” she said.

Ben huffed out a laugh. 

“You don’t even know what’s wrong with mine,” he countered.

Maz’s grin grew almost terrifyingly large.

“Doesn’t matter what the damage is, Little Solo,” she responded firmly, “my mechanic can fix anything. Built a speeder out of spare parts from a downed AT-AT once.”

Ben’s eyebrows flew up so fast he winced.

“Impossible,” he said, “how would he even get it to run without a micro-gravity stabilizer? I’ve never seen an AT-AT with one of those.”

Maz raised one of her own eyebrows and said, “Why, built one, of course.” Maz’s grin turned a little wicked. “From spare parts scavenged out of a TIE shot down using nothing but a blaster.”

Ben laughed out loud at that.

“Oh, of course, how silly of me.” He rolled his eyes. “Of course. And he shot down a whole-ass TIE with a single blaster.”

He’d give Maz one thing, she was funny. Except, she wasn’t laughing.

“Modified blaster,” she said and Ben stopped laughing, gaping at her instead.

“You’re serious?”

Maz grinned again.

“Dead serious,” she replied, “there’s nothing my mechanic can’t do.”

Ben couldn’t deny that he was intrigued.

“All right, I’ll take your word for it. How do I find him?” He asked, standing.

Maz jumped down from her chair and, once again, motioned for Ben to follow her. They went down a long hallway, past a busy looking kitchen and a few closed doors before going left and through another door. They stepped out into the sunlight once more. Maz pointed out past the lake, toward a large rock formation on the other side of the water.

“There,” she stated, “Make sure to say that I sent you. And park that monstrosity of yours out of site before you get there or you might find yourself on the business end of that modified blaster before you can even land.”

Monstrosity? Ben was mildly offended by that. While he understood most people’s reactions to seeing his ship, he hadn’t been wrong in its design. It had come through for him more times than not, confusing his enemies long enough to gain a significant advantage against them. It had the added bonus of keeping most derelicts from trying to intercept or target him, like that one mercenary ship a few months back that took one look at his fighter and hit lightspeed to get away before he could blink.

Still, Ben figured it was better to simply agree than to argue the point.

“Yes, ma’am,” he nodded, gifting Maz a lopsided grin.

She narrowed her eyes at him.

“Hmphf,” she snorted, “just that like that father of yours.” She stepped back into the castle, still muttering as she walked away. “Think they can flash those dimples and I’ll ignore their impertinence. Ridiculous.”

Ben’s grin grew. He chuckled at the little pirate all the way back to his ship. Once inside, he powered up, then took a moment to scarf down a ration bar before he took off, flying low and through the trees in the hopes of avoiding any more unnecessary attention. He turned his scanner on and hit the auto-tune, listening closely for any chatter related to him and his location. He still didn’t trust that someone inside the castle hadn’t contacted the First Order immediately after Maz’s outburst.

Well...the First Order or Kanjiklub or Crimson Dawn, the Black Sun, the Hutts…

Damn, sometimes being Han Solo’s kid was more trouble than it was worth. Sure, the first group might be after him more because of his whole family but the crime syndicates? That was all Han.

Ben steered under a mess of vines and around the gnarled trunk of a particularly old tree, still keeping one ear on the scanner. So far he’d heard only the usual transmissions: conversations between long-haul freighters, a bounty hunter imploring his mark to surrender, a Galactic Med transport reporting back to the Senate on the state of the viral outbreak on Bespin. Nothing to do with him and yet Ben was well aware of the limitations of his scanner. While it could detect and read over a thousand different frequencies, there were just as many it could not. There was still a very good possibility that he was being tracked which made it imperative that Maz’s mechanic friend get his ship back to rights as soon as kriffing possible.

Maneuvering his ship slightly higher, just breaking the tops of the trees, Ben spotted the rock formation and adjusted his trajectory by three degrees. A few minutes later, he slowed and settled the ship on an area of relatively flat land just inside the tree line. He sat for a moment and reached out into the Force, hoping to get some kind of read on the mechanic and almost cursing himself for not asking Maz for more information about the guy.

He sensed nothing. There were no life forms close by.

Ben’s brow scrunched. Perhaps the mechanic was a droid. Unlikely but it would explain the lack of Force signature in the area. Growling in aggravation, Ben hit the latch to the cockpit and jumped out. Feet firmly on the ground once more, he stretched, popping his back and contemplated removing his jacket. In the end, the choice was taken from him.

He felt the wind of an object coming toward him a nanosecond before the blow and his world went black.

*****

The radiating pain and nausea that resulted from a hit to the back of the head were not strangers to Ben. It was his experience with such that allowed him to come back into consciousness without making any movement or noise that might alert whoever had hit him that he was awake. Keeping his breathing even, Ben once again reached out into the Force. He wanted to know who had managed to sneak up on him and how. How had he not felt them? Even someone who wasn’t Force sensitive would have a Force signature. Every living creature did. But not this person.

He could hear them breathing and the very light scuff of movement. They were quiet, likely very light on their feet.

And they were strong enough to knock him out cold with one swing.

That fact alone gave Ben every reason to take precautions. Whatever the species of this being, they were clearly adept at fighting and sneaking. This was the first time in a very long time that Ben had been caught unawares and it left a sour taste in his mouth.

Or maybe that was the bile that wanted to be freed from his stomach, which rolled unpleasantly, and he was ashamed of the slight whimper that wanted to escape. Nevertheless, Ben fought it down, refusing to give up any advantage he might have in his captor believing him still knocked out. It proved to be a pointless endeavor, however, for a moment later Ben felt the cool touch of a cloth against his forehead and a soft chuckled above him.

“I know you’re awake,” a voice said. Ben jolted. The sweet cadence and somewhat familiar accent washed over him like an early morning springtime rain. “I am sorry for hitting you but you should expect retaliation from people when you come flying up on them in a First Order style ship.”

Ben was going to argue the point, but the speaker, obviously female, went on. She patted him, not so lightly, on the stomach and nudged him as if to roll him over.

“Come on big boy, let’s get it over with,” she said, “you’ll feel a million times better once you empty your stomach.”

Ben heard the clink of pottery being set on stone. His mind revolted at the thought of throwing up in front of someone else, especially whoever was attached to that delicious voice. He fought the urge down once again.

“I’m fine,” he gritted out and let his eyes flutter open.

The voice belonged to a human female. Ben’s thoughts flew past his consciousness, nothing staying long enough for him to grasp onto with any real clarity, save two: “kriff she’s beautiful” and “how did someone so small take me down?”

The woman raised an eyebrow at him.

“Small?” she asked, cocking her head at him, “Compared to you, perhaps, but no less fierce for it, as you are now aware.”

Upon the realization that he had definitely spoken the last of his thoughts out loud, Ben hoped that he had not also voiced his opinion of her attractiveness. He had already embarrassed himself enough in front of her, no need to add that to it. When the woman turned away, Ben sighed in relief. Either he hadn’t called her beautiful to her face or she hadn’t heard it. Regardless, he needed to get back to business.

“How, kriff!” Ben groaned as he pulled himself into a sitting position and laid his head in his hands. He took a couple of deep, slow breaths and chanced looking up at her. “How long was I out?”

The woman smirked at him. Ben took a moment to survey the room he was in. It was a workshop of sorts. Three long wooden tables lined the walls and were filled with tools and parts from various droids, ships and other mechanical devices. In the center of the room were two more tables, work benches, he surmised. The woman was leaning against one of those work benches, cleaning something small and circular with an old rag.

“Only about twenty minutes or so,” she said, “took nearly that long to drag your heavy arse back here.”

Ben winced.

“How did you manage to drag me back here? I’m not exactly...light,” he responded, gesturing to his, admitattly, enormous body.

The woman grinned at that, wide and free. The light from the small windows near the ceiling of the room flashed over her as she stepped forward and Ben was rewarded with the sight of several freckles appearing on the bridge of her nose.

“I used my speeder,” she chuckled, looking away from him for a moment. When she met his eyes again, there was a mischief there that had Ben’s body heating. “Tied a rope around you and just,” she made a motion with her hand, “zoom.”

Uh, ouch?

“You dragged me on the ground? Through the forest?” Ben asked, both flabbergasted and a little pissed off. Mentally, he checked himself for injuries beyond his head and was confused that he felt none.

“Relax,” the woman rolled her eyes at him, “I managed to manhandle you onto that first.”

She tilted her head toward something behind Ben and he turned to look. _That_ , was a cockpit shield from an old N-1 class Starfighter, the kind his grandfather had flown as a young Padawan. Ben grimaced but had to admit that the gently curved shape would make it an effective sled once turned upside down. He sighed.

“Well, I appreciate you helping me,” he said, looking back at the woman, “even though you were the reason I needed help to begin with.” The woman, still grinning, gave him a nod of acknowledgement. She didn’t look the least bit chastised. “I need to go, however. I came out here looking for a mechanic.”

At that, the woman stopped smiling and Ben suddenly felt bereft.

“A mechanic?” The woman set the part she had been cleaning onto the table behind her, giving Ben her back. It was clear she was attempting to sound nonchalant as she spoke. “Why would you be looking for a mechanic out here?”

Ben, again, looked around the shop. Ah.

“You’re the mechanic Maz told me about,” he said, suddenly understanding.

The woman whipped around at that, eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“Maz sent you?” She asked, tone cold.

Ben was nonplussed. Why would that make her angry? Slowly, he nodded, never taking his eyes off of hers. She chewed her lip for a moment, distracting him from his train of thought. When she let out a defeated sigh, Ben almost wanted to tell her never mind, that he would find someone else and he was sorry to have bothered her.

“Fine,” she snapped and marched over to one of the tables along the wall. “Let’s go see what kind of hell you’ve put your ridiculous ship through.”

Ben scrambled up from the floor and followed, muttering to himself.

“My ship is not ridiculous. Why can’t people understand? Love that ship.”

His mumbles stopped as abruptly as the woman in front of him. She glanced at him from the corner of her eye and then tossed over her shoulder, “I’m Rey, by the way.”

“Ben,” he replied, somewhat surprised.

Rey nodded and continued walking. When they got back to his Phantom, she jumped in immediately, pulling the maintenance hatch and scrambling inside the space as much as the opening would allow. The move left her lower half hanging out and Ben tried his damndest not to stare at the round of her behind, cupped in dark grey linen, as it wiggled side to side with her movements. A few minutes later, Rey hefted herself back out and dropped to the ground. It was then that Ben realized she had literally been hanging half-in and half-out of the ship.

“Well,” Rey wiped her hands on her trusty rag, then stowed it in her back pocket. “Not as bad as I expected, to be honest. Your stabilizer is damaged but repairable. You’ll need a new oscillator though. I’ve got the parts.” She looked up at the patch of sky just visible beyond the trees. “I can have you back in the air within the hour.”

Ben sighed in relief and opened his mouth to thank her. She beat him to the punch and he felt like it was an actual punch. To his gut.

“Five thousand credits,” Rey said.

Ben stumbled.

“What?”

“Five. Thousand. Credits.” She repeated.

All thoughts of her pretty hazel eyes, sweet dulcet tones and plump, firm arse fled Ben’s mind. He scowled.

“That’s interstellar robbery!” He cried. “There’s no way in hell those parts cost that much!”

Rey raised an eyebrow at him.

“No, but that is how much my time and labor cost,” she said, tone now frigid.

Ben winced and he put his hands up, attempting to placate her.

“Yes, your time and expertise and labor are very valuable,” he attempted to amend. “But you have to know that even the most skilled mechanics on Coruscant wouldn’t charge that.”

Rey snorted. “Never been to Coruscant. Wouldn’t know. That’s my price,” she raised her chin, almost daring him to argue, “take it or leave it, Your Highness.”

Ben blinked in confusion.

“Wait, you know who I am?” He asked, somewhat astonished. Though his name was well known, his face was not and he had only told her his name was Ben so…

Rey repeated his confounded expression back at him, her tone wavering, “Wait, what?”

“What?” Ben asked again.

Rey tilted her head, eyeing him up and down, like she was evaluating a droid at an auction market.

“You’re actually a king?” She asked.

“Uh, prince,” Ben said and regretted it the moment the words came out of his mouth. She didn’t, in fact, know who he was and her comment had been facetious rather than an acknowledgement of his title.

“Huh,” Rey’s expression gave nothing away, her mouth parted ever so slightly and eyes shuttered. She looked back at his ship, then at him “figures.”

Figures? What the hell was that supposed to mean?

“Five thousand,” Rey repeated, “up front.” Then she walked away, headed back to the rock formation where she had carved out a space for her workshop and home.

Ben stared after her in shock.

*****

Fifteen minutes later, Ben was still arguing with himself over what to do. He needed to get his ship repaired but five thousand credits was insane. He considered asking to buy the parts from her - after all, he had designed and built the ship himself, he could easily repair it - but figured she would just charge him obscenely for those as well...if she sold them to him at all. Goodness knows he had insulted her when he ignored the value of her labor when balking at the price she had set.

He groaned, leaning his head back against the seat.

He had no choice. He knew it. She knew it. And it wasn’t like he couldn’t afford it but it was the principle of the matter.

Ben wilted in his seat. Fine. She’d get her money and Ben would get the hell off this planet.

The sooner, the better.

He mentally ran through every option, realistic or not, just to be sure. In the end, though, he jumped from the ship and made his way back to Rey’s workshop, metaphorical tail stuck firmly between his legs.


	2. One Man's Garbage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry it has taken so long to get this updated. Some things have been happening at work that...well, let's just say I've been updating my resume because I am concerned about some of the decisions of the higher ups.

Twenty minutes after leaving the prince - he was a kriffing  _ prince _ , what the hell? - Rey was pacing the space between her work tables, biting her thumbnail and wondering if she had made a mistake in walking away.

She had been down on the lakeshore when she heard the quiet rustle of leaves. Wondering if Maz had come for a visit, Rey had walked back toward her home, only to find a First Order ship landing in a clearing in the trees nearby. Alternating between fear and fury, Rey had snuck up on the ship and, the moment the pilot was on the ground, she had attacked. Upon closer examination of the craft, however, Rey realized that the ship was not First Order at all, only made to look like it was. She understood the logic that had likely gone into the design but she still thought it was stupid. Even so, she couldn’t deny it was one sexy ship.

Just like its owner.

“Kriff, Rey!” She snarled at herself.

The man, Ben, was...big. Big and handsome and oh those eyes and lips and beauty marks and hair…

“Enough!” Rey yanked at her braid in frustration. “Just because he’s attractive, that does not mean you have to go drooling over him. He’s insufferable!”

Indeed. Obnoxious, self-important, arrogant, rude. And a prince. Kriff.

Rey had known he had money the moment she got him back to her workshop and took a good look. His clothes were obviously expensive and he clearly had the funds to keep himself well-groomed. Rummaging around inside his ship had only confirmed it for her. She had worked on enough custom ships to know one when she saw it. And that ship? Completely custom. She had no doubt it had been designed specifically for him, probably with him hovering over the engineer’s shoulder the whole time, giving his opinions even when they weren’t wanted. It was for this reason that she had quoted him such a high price.

Rey had a rule. She had a base price she charged for labor and then, depending on how much her customer looked like they could afford, she adjusted it accordingly. Prince Ben, and she still couldn’t wrap her head around that, could probably afford to pay ten times that amount. She wondered what he would think if she told him she would have fixed his ship for nothing more than the cost of the parts, or even for free, if he were obviously poor. Rey laughed to herself at that thought.

A noise outside the workshop door had her standing up straight from the slouch she had been in. She moved over to her work table and made herself look busy with the cleaning droid laid atop it. It was meant to be a gift for Maz, if she could ever get the stupid thing working.

The door creaked open behind her and Rey did her best not to tense up.

“Uh,” she heard Ben clear his throat, “I suppose your offer is fair, considering I don’t have much choice here.”

Rey felt bad for a moment. He wasn’t wrong. She effectively had him caught between a rock and...wait.

“Really?” She looked at him, finally giving him her attention. “You’re telling me you don’t have a, I don’t know, a phalanx of servants or an army you could call to come help you? What kind of prince are you?”

It really made no sense. If he was a prince and as wealthy as he appeared, surely he had someone he could call to assist him. Surely he didn’t actually need her.

Ben flushed. He looked down at the dirt floor of her shop, rubbing one of his truly massive hands against his neck.

“I’m…” he struggled with the words and she crossed her arms over her chest, waiting. “I can’t call anyone,” he said, finally, “I’m not technically supposed to be out here. I…” he looked away from her, “it’s best if no one knows I’m here.”

A tingle of paranoia began to grow in her. Why would he not want anyone to know he was on Takodana? Rey shifted back, eyeing her staff leaning against the wall. She had taken him down once, she could do it again.

He must have noticed her suspicion because he threw up his hands, the way he had when he had tried to placate her before.

“No, I’m sorry, I know how that sounds, kriff,” he rubbed his neck again, his plush mouth working. “I was on...another planet, doing some recon. I was attacked by a squadron of TIEs on my way back to...where I was going.”

Rey stopped her slow shuffle toward the staff. Recon? For who? She decided she would find out more while working on his ship. The more she put him at ease, the more she would be able to get out of him. She knew this from experience. It was amazing what people would reveal when you made them feel comfortable and asked the right questions in just the right way.

“All right,” she conceded, “bring your ship in, around back. I’ll open the hanger.”

Ben’s shoulders lost a good deal of their tension and he flashed her a grin. Rey’s knees felt a little weak at that and she scolded herself once more, watching him swagger back out the door.

This man was going to be trouble, she just knew it, and she wondered what in the galaxy had possessed Maz to send him her way.

*****

Rey directed Ben, guiding him into the hanger, then walked away before he could depart the ship. She was having a hard time getting that smirk of his out of her head and she couldn’t bear the thought of looking him in the eye while thinking what she was thinking.

“I really do appreciate this,” she heard him say.

Rey shrugged in response, unable to bring herself to speak. She dug through the box of spare oscillators she had, looking for one that would fit and was in good enough condition to justify her, admittedly, outrageous price. Just as she found one she thought might work, Ben shouted and she found herself on the ground underneath him. Not even a second later, explosions sounded outside.

“What the kriff?” She struggled against Ben, pushing him back and scrambling to her knees.

The entire left side of the shop had been blown away, right where she had been standing before Ben had tackled her. She looked at him, eyes wide.

“How did you…” she started but then Ben, eyes still on her, reached an arm out toward his ship and a moment later, a rucksack  _ flew through the kriffing air and into his hand _ . Her eyes flew wide open and she knew she was gawking at him.

“Do you have another ship?” He asked, startling her from her stupor.

“What? Another…” Rey cringed when a TIE flew overhead, the screams of its wings against the downdraft making her shudder. “Yes, a ship, yes,” she looked back at Ben, “I have one, come on.”

She motioned for Ben to follow her and they left the hangar and re-entered the workshop. Rey snatched up her staff, blaster and her own rucksack - still, even after all these years, packed and ready to go at a moment’s notice. Ben raised an eyebrow at her but she didn’t feel like explaining her life, her history, to this man. She shook her head at him, then motioned to the forest behind her rock formation.

“This way,” she shouted over the firing of the now three TIEs in the air, “it’s too big to park close to my home.”

Ben nodded at her, sent one last longing and regretful look toward his own ship, and followed her out of the workshop and down a well-worn path through the trees.

They raced along, Ben struggling to keep up. Rey did not slow down for him, even though it was obvious he was not used to the terrain. She glanced back and saw him stumbling over branches and tripping over the uneven ground. Curiously, he closed his eyes, brow furrowed. When she could see the deep brown of his irises once more, he seemed to have gotten control of his footing and his speed picked up. Huh.

Rey made a quick change in direction, hopping down a low ledge and into a slide that took her down the side of a hill. Ben followed easily, much to her disappointment. She had almost been hoping to see him tumble arse over tea-kettle through the brush. The cocky grin he shot her made her realize he knew exactly what she had expected and she frowned, resolving to ignore him as best she could the rest of the way to her ship. They took off again, running another good ten minutes and then nearly hit a wall. Literally.

The cliffside towered over them and Rey, already forgetting her own vow, shot Ben her own smirk. She swung the strap of her staff across her back and began to climb. He followed her, grunting. They scaled the wall in record time. Rey was appalled to climb over the edge a few seconds behind Ben. The jerk. How had he beaten her?

Whatever. It didn’t matter.

Rey skirted around him toward the opening in the cliff-face. She headed for the ship, not waiting for Ben to follow. The loud bark of a laugh had her stopping mid-stride. She turned to see Ben hunched over, guffawing and tears streaming down his face.

“You,” he stopped to catch his breath, “you have got to be kidding me.”

A flare of indignation had Rey stomping back over to him. She poked him in the chest and he stood up straight, still grinning.

“It may look like garbage but this ship is fast,” Rey scowled, “You want to get away from those TIEs? This is your only ride, _ Your Highness _ .” She made sure to put extra scorn into the last two words.

Ben was still laughing when he nodded at her and she took off toward her ship again, agitation in every step.

“Garbage, huh?” She heard Ben say behind her. “Oh, if he could only hear you.”

He who? Rey shook her head. She didn’t care. Let him laugh. This ship had saved her life and she would defend it to anyone. Especially to him, who had no clue what kind of power lay under the beat up exterior of her Corellian-class freighter. She boarded the ship and headed to the cockpit. Ben’s long legs, however, had him passing her and she squawked in indignation when he took the pilot’s seat.

“Take the guns,” he said, not looking at her.

“Excuse me?” She growled, stepping around the seat to stand next to him, glaring. “This is my ship, what makes you think you can just…”

Rey trailed off. She watched as Ben expertly started the ship up, flicking the correct (but actually out of order) sequence for take-off.

“How,” she looked at him, mouth open, “how did you know what to do? This ship’s start-up isn’t configured correctly. How did you know?”

Ben smirked.

“Guns, Rey,” he said softly and then had the audacity to  _ wink  _ at her.

Rey scowled.

“Fine,” she snapped, “but this isn’t over.”

She stormed out of the cockpit. On her way to the gunnery, she felt the ship begin to lift and braced herself as Ben steered it out of the cavern and they shot into the sky. She ran the last few feet to the guns and threw herself into the seat, strapping in and prepping her muscles for the wild ride the gun-seat provided. The first of the TIEs appeared in her line of sight just as Ben’s voice came through the com, warning her. She ignored him and fired, hitting the TIE dead on. One down, how many to go?

The next several minutes were spent shooting at the TIEs, which seemed to multiply with every one she shot down. It wasn’t until darkness began to creep over her window that Rey realized what Ben was doing.

“What the hell?” She cried, shooting another TIE. “Why are we leaving atmo?”

“Uh, because we have an entire squadron of First Order ships on our ass, because I need to get my intel to my people and because the First Order won’t hesitate to blow the entire planet to smithereens if we stay?” 

Ben’s irritation was clear, even through the coms. Rey sighed. She knew he was right, at least about the first part and the last part. She honestly didn’t know if she cared about his intel or his people, whoever they were. Although, if the First Order was after him, surely that meant he was one of the good guys?

“Fine,” she said and hated how many times she had said that word since meeting him.

Once they were clear of the planet, the TIEs seemed to disappear. Rey knew that was mostly because of Ben’s flying, expert as it was. She abandoned her post and headed back to the front of the ship, intent on getting some answers.

Ben was already facing her when she stormed back into the cockpit, elbows resting on his knees and hands clasped in between them. The bantha-shit eating grin on his face only riled her up more.

“How the kriff did you know how to fly my ship?” She snarled, furious and not entirely sure why she was so mad.

Ben chuckled and her anger ratched up a notch or ten.

“Technically,” he said, sitting back now and crossing one leg over the other, “it’s my ship.”

Rey’s jaw dropped. How dare he! How dare this, this,  _ nerf-herder _ claim her ship!

“Excuse me?” She screeched, voice pitching to almost unheard of levels. She felt some satisfaction when Ben winced at the tone.

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. When he looked at her, his eyes were dark and Rey couldn’t help but shiver.

“How did you get this ship?” Ben asked.

Rey started. What?

“I…” she stopped, not wanting to tell him the truth.

“You stole it,” he said for her and she frowned.

“From Unkar Plutt,” she admitted haughtily and crossed her arms over her chest, “who stole it from the Irving Boys who stole it from Ducain.”

Rey straightened her spine, daring Ben to argue with her.

“Who stole it from Han Solo,” he responded, smirk back in place. “Therefore, my ship.”

Rey blinked at him. Han Solo. Han Solo?  _ Han Solo? _

“This is Han Solo’s ship?” She asked, stepping toward him, excitement making her voice tremble. “This is the Millennium Falcon?”

“It is,” Ben’s grin grew.

“Wait,” Rey stopped, still a foot or so away from him. “If this is Han Solo’s ship, why are you claiming it?”

If she had thought Ben’s grin had been big before, that was nothing compared to his smirk now. He lifted his hand, slowly, and pointed one finger at himself.

“Ben Solo,” he said.

Rey fell into the seat behind her. Ben was Ben Solo. Ben Solo, the son of Han and Leia Solo. Grandson of Anakin Skywalker and Padmé Amidala. Resistance General Ben Solo. The whispers and rumors and conjecture about this man...

“Oh,” Rey breathed. “You really are a prince, huh? Naboo, right?”

Ben laughed at that.

“Naboo, I...yes, technically but only in name, not in duty,” he said, “Alderaan though…”

Rey found herself nodding.

“Right, right. Even I know the tale: your mother is the appointed heir of the crown of Alderaan. Apparently Bale Organa treats her as if she were his own daughter, he loves her so much,” she whispered, mind reeling. “This is the Millennium Falcon and you’re Prince Ben Solo.”

“Yes,” Ben’s grin gentled. “But I prefer just Ben, you know?”

Rey huffed out a laugh, shaking her head and wondering just  _ what  _ Maz had been thinking, sending the Prince of Alderaan to her doorstep.

“Okay,” she said, “okay. Well, where to?”

Ben regarded her for a moment, seemingly surprised at her question.

“Well,” he said slowly, “we can’t go back to Takodana. It’s too dangerous.”

Rey waved a hand at him and climbed over his stupidly long legs to settle herself in the co-pilot’s seat.

“Of course not, it’s probably crawling with Stormtroopers by now,” she replied, “I meant, where were you headed before you had to crash land in my front yard?”

Ben scoffed at that.

“I didn’t crash land,” he muttered, then louder said, “I was on my way back to Ahch-To, to give my grandfather and uncle some information I found on Endor.”

“Endor?” Rey was lost. “There’s nothing on Endor, though, except from some particularly adorable natives.”

Ben reached into his bag and pulled out a data chip. He held it up to her.

“The Empire had a base there, when it was trying to gain a foothold before the Rebellion and the Senate Army wiped them out,” Ben said, “One of the Imperial generals escaped and is now part of the First Order. His name is Pryde. He has been using the base on Endor as a sort of top-secret information hub. We, my grandfather and uncle and I, discovered this and I went there to try to get intel on what the First Order is doing in the Unknown Regions. They’ve set up a blockade about sixty parsecs beyond the barrier and no one can get in.”

Rey sat back in her seat, contemplating what Ben had just told her. She knew that he likely expected her to want to drop him off somewhere or...or he expected for  _ her  _ to ask to be dropped off somewhere. Fat chance of  _ that _ !

“So what’s our next move?” She asked, making her decision.

“Our?” Ben responded, eyebrows in his hairline.

“Well, I can’t go back to Takodana,” she shrugged, “might as well go with you.”

Ben seemed to be struggling with that and she decided to take pity on him,

“Look, we both know this ship needs two pilots, at the very least so there’s someone to man the guns,” she said, “And I bounced around this part of the galaxy in this ship long enough to know that it is pretty much the most well-known and easily identified ship in existence so we are going to have company, sooner or later. Plus,” it was her turn to grin, “I have no issues with helping to take down the First Order.”

Ben was shaking his head at her, laughing, by the time she was done talking. The look in his eyes told her she had won.

“Alright,” he conceded, “let’s start by finding out what’s on this data chip. If the intel isn’t going to be useful, I’d rather know now than when I present it to my grandfather.”

Rey rolled her eyes.

“Don’t want dear old granddaddy to find out you carked up your mission?” She needled, still sore about him effectively wresting control of her ship from her.

“He’s not the one I’m afraid of,” Ben snorted.

“No?” Rey knew her eyebrows were raised. “I’ve heard stories about what he can do. Seems pretty intimidating to me.”

Ben cocked his head at her.

“What he can do?” Be looked away, working his mouth again, distracting her for a moment. He looked back at her and she flushed. “You mean the Force.” 

Rey shrugged.

“Sure, that,” she replied, “I’ve heard of it. You…” she peeked up at him, wondering, “before, with your bag...you…”

“Yes,” Ben nodded at her, “I was using the Force then.”

“Huh,” Rey leaned back in her seat, pulling her legs up to cross in front of her on the seat. “So, what, is it some kind of magic? Or? Actually, you know what? Forget it. We need to take a look at that data chip, right?”

For some reason, Ben looked almost crestfallen at her change of subject. She wondered if he was one of those people who loved talking about a subject just because they could show off how much they knew. But, then...the more she learned about him, the more Rey was coming to realize that her initial judgements about him hadn’t been totally correct. Oh, he was full of himself, no doubt, but he wasn’t the full-on arrogant ass-hat she had pegged him as either.

“Right, uh, the data chip,” Ben fumbled for a moment, attempting to get a good grip on the tiny chip with his big hands. 

He slid it into the reader and pulled up the holoscreen. Files sprang up, flashing onto the screen so quickly Rey wasn’t able to read anything before the next one appeared. What seemed like forever later, the chip stopped loading and Ben began to sift through the files in front of them. One file in particular made him stop cold. Rey leaned closer, squinting at the tiny text on the folder. It read ‘Starkiller’ and Rey waited for Ben to click on it. He didn’t so much as move. Rey looked at him, concerned. He had gone pale. Well, even paler than he already was. And his hand was trembling.

Rey reached out to him, laying a hand on his arm.

“Hey? Ben?” She said, keeping her voice low and soft in the hopes she wouldn’t startle him.

No luck. Ben jumped and slapped her arm away, his eyes wide.

“Oh, shit, sorry, Rey. I’m sorry. I don’t,” he stopped himself and rubbed his hands down his face.

“Ben?” Rey glanced back at the file. “What is this? What is Starkiller?”

Still shaking, Ben reached up and selected the file. A graphic of a large round object came up. Rey read over the schematics that popped up alongside it.

“Uses the power of the sun?” Rey whispered. “Once charged, a single shot…Oh. Oh my stars. Ben!”

Rey was horrified and she could tell Ben felt the same.

“My grandfather warned us about this,” he said quietly. “He warned us that the First Order would try to go a step further than the Empire had with their Death Star. He  _ knew  _ they would! He even knew what they would call it!”

Ben leapt from his seat, both hands now running through his hair. He paced the cockpit, muttering to himself. Rey turned back to the holo in front of her, shifting through the files in the Starkiller folder. One made her stop. She read it twice, three times and her blood ran cold.

“Ben,” she said. Either he didn’t hear her over his own voice or he was ignoring her. Rey turned to him and shouted, “Ben!”

He stopped and looked up at her, his eyes a little wild.

“Ben,” Rey tried again, swallowing thickly in an attempt to clear the fear from her voice, “the timetable.”

She pointed at the chart next to her and Ben scrambled back into his seat and leaned forward, reading.

“They‘re going to fire it,” his voice had gone hoarse, “they plan to fire at the Hosnian system in less than ten hours.”

Rey couldn’t breathe. She tried to remain calm but the very idea of an entire system being destroyed...all of those people…

“I’ve got to get a hold of grandfather,” Ben said, frantic, as he pulled up the com and began typing in what looked like a complicated code.

They waited several minutes but received no reply. Ben cursed under his breath and typed in a new code, then another, and another.

“No answers from anyone!” He shouted. “Wait...wait.”

He put in one last code and the hale was answered almost immediately. Rey jolted in her seat at the small green being that appeared on the holo in front of them.

“Young Solo,” the being said, “a pleasure it is.”

“Master Yoda,” Ben replied, “I’m afraid I cannot agree. I need your help. Please.”

The little being’s eyes widened. He nodded and listened attentively as Ben explained the situation. The stern lines of his mouth deepened as his expression turned grim.

“And I don’t have time to return to Ahch-To and get to Starkiller in time to stop this. Kriff,” Ben said, “I barely have time to get to Starkiller from my current position.” He looked up at Yoda. “I have to try to stop this, but if I am unsuccessful…”

Yoda made a noise of affirmation.

“Go, Young Solo,” he said, “destroy Starkiller you must. Evacuate the Hosnian System, we will.”

“And my family?” Ben asked. “I haven’t been able to reach my parents or my grandparents. Even Chewy is not responding.”

“Hmm,” Yoda closed his eyes, “Their plan, this was.” He set his gaze back on Ben. “Called emergency Senate meeting, First Order allies did. Here, your family is.”

Ben’s breathing stuttered so loudly, Rey worried that he might pass out.

“My family is on Coruscant?” His voice was reduced to a grating tremor.

“Yes,” Yoda replied, “Contact them I will, contact the Resistance I will. Come, reinforcements shall. Go.”

Ben took in several shaky breaths as he thanked the little being and closed the transmission. Rey wondered what she should do. Clearly, Ben was too shaken by his family being in danger to make any decisions at the moment but she hadn’t a clue where Starkiller might be in the Unknown Regions or what to expect when they got there. She needed the unflappable flyboy back,  _ now _ .

“Hey,” Rey lowered her voice again, softening it. She stood from her seat, only to kneel in front of Ben. She clasped her hands on his arms, stroking over the supple leather. “Ben, look at me.”

Slowly, the fear in his eyes cleared and he focused on her. His jaw clenched, then relaxed. He searched her face, then closed his eyes. Rey waited as he took several deep breaths, a strange feeling washing over her. It was as though she could feel the peace sweep through him, driving out the mania that had overtaken him only moments before. When he looked at her once again, he was back to the cool, calm and collected Ben she had already grown to know so well.

“Do you,” he began but Rey stopped him, knowing that what he was about to say would only piss her off.

“Don’t you dare even try to suggest that you drop me off somewhere, Ben Solo,” Rey said firmly, “I’m in this, I’m with you. One hundred percent.”

Letting out another breath, Ben nodded then he smirked, his Solo genes shining through once more.

“All right, Sweetheart,” he said, voice low and smooth. Rey ignored the heat that stabbed through her at that, “let’s go destroy us a weapon of mass destruction.”

Rey snorted.

“You are such a dork, Solo.”


	3. Force Thingy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not going to apologize for taking so long to update. Mostly because I am worried I am going to have to apologize each time! (I am sorry though...)
> 
> I really do hope this is worth the wait!

“So if the blockade is impenetrable, how are we going to get in?”

Rey’s voice startled Ben out of the meditative trance he had been in since setting course for the Unknown Regions. He took several long, slow, deep breaths to calm his irritation. Rey had been asking questions non-stop for the last four hours about Starkiller, it’s power, how it worked, and many other things besides and he was beginning to contemplate sacrificing the time to dump her off somewhere just to be rid of the incessant badgering. Unfortunately, as it was, he would be lucky to make it to the planetary-system destroying base before it fired on the Hosnian System.

He could always toss her out of the airlock, he supposed.

“Ben,” Rey clapped her hands in front of his face, “Are you even listening to me?”

Ben sighed, forcing himself to repeat his grandfather’s mantra in his head as he rose from his seated position on the floor.

_ “There is peace and there is passion, what you choose to do with them is what makes you who you are.” _

Ben was pretty sure he should be calling on peace right now to deal with Rey and her aggravating prodding but he sure was passionate about that air-lock idea, regardless of how attractive he found her. Still, he understood why she was asking him to tell her more about Starkiller. In order to destroy it, they needed to understand just how it worked.

“Did you not read the files?” Ben asked her.

Rey huffed at him, rolling her eyes in the process.

“Of course I did,” she snapped, “I read them, looked at the blueprints, calculated the amount of blast force that would be necessary to blow the thing to smithereens from various locations that we could conceivably use as the epicenter.” She waved a hand in the air, rolling her eyes again. “But none of that does us any good if we can’t get through the blockade.”

She had a point, though Ben hated to admit it. He scrubbed a hand over his face and gestured for her to sit at the Dejarik table. He slid in on the other side of the booth, clasped his hands together on top of the table and leaned forward.

“Okay, let’s talk through this,” he said, attempting to project a calm and decisive demeanor.

Rey snorted at him and slapped her own hands down on the hologame surface, making him wince. She was a violent little thing.

“Okay,” she said, nodding decisively, “first things first, what kind of ships make up the blockade?”

Ben blinked at her.

“What?”

The way Rey was looking at him, he wondered if she understood what he meant by blockade.

“Rey,” he said, slowly, and winced when she narrowed her eyes at his tone, “the intelligence my family has gathered state that the blockade isn’t made up of ships, its battle drones and droids, a field of mines and several laser cannons situated on asteroids that run the length of the blockade.”

Ben watched as Rey processed this information. He felt a little bad that he had dampened her enthusiasm but she needed to go into this with the understanding that they very likely wouldn’t make it out alive. Getting past the blockade might have sounded like the worst of what they were facing but Ben had no doubt that what came after, on Starkiller itself, would be much, much worse.

He hoped that Master Yoda got in touch with his family in time for Ben to at least be able to talk to them one last time.

“So,” Rey said, staring off into space while twirling one finger in front of her, “what you’re saying is that the blockade has no intelligent life form standing guard, it’s all machine?”

Ben rubbed his temples. From the way she brightened while talking, nearly glowing in satisfaction by the end, she didn’t seem to be getting it.

“Yes, the entire blockade is made up of machines. Machines don’t make mistakes, Rey,” he stated firmly, hoping she would understand what the issue was.

Rey smirked at him.

“Machines don’t make mistakes, Ben,” she parroted, “at least, not the way that life forms do. But they can be  _ forced  _ to make mistakes.” She sat back in her seat, arms crossed over her chest, and wiggled her eyebrows at him.

Ben sat for a moment, dumbfounded. His face went so slack in disbelief that he almost wondered if his jaw had come completely unhinged.

“I…” he sucked in a breath, “are you...are you suggesting that I  _ use the Force  _ to manipulate the entirety of the blockade?”

Rey’s smirk grew, her eyes gleaming with something that had Ben shifting in his seat. Whether it was from a small amount of fear, a large amount of horniness, or both, he wasn’t sure. Regardless, he had to nip this little ill-thought plan in the bud as soon as possible, lest Rey get the wrong idea about him.

“Nope,” he said, shaking his head. “No can do.”

The frustration in Rey’s eyes made him feel bad but only for a moment because then she opened her mouth again.

“Uh, yup, that’s exactly what you’re going to do,” she said, “in fact, you do exactly as I say and that whole blockade will be rubbish in a matter of minutes. That is, if what you did with your bag earlier is demonstrative of your ability. I would hate to overestimate you.”

Ben sneered. She was baiting him and damned it all if it wasn’t working.

“What, exactly, is your plan?” He asked, in spite of himself.

Rey took several seconds to answer him and he began to wonder if she even had a plan to begin with or if it had all been a way to needle him. Again.

“First, to make sure I work out the kinks, I need to see a demonstration of what you can really do,” she finally responded. “What sequence of events I have you enact is dependent on whether or not the actions are actually feasible or if they are beyond what your,” she waved her hands at him, nose wrinkled, “Force thingy can do.”

Force. Thingy.

Ben scowled. “Did you seriously just call it my Force thingy?”

She shrugged, looking not at all repentant.

“I guess I did,” she grinned at him and Ben had the sudden urge to kiss her senseless.

While manhandling her toward the airlock.

He sighed, letting his head fall back against the seat and running his hands through his hair. Rey just watched him, silently. Ben debated with himself. Should he ask her to explain what she had in mind? Or perhaps give her the demonstration of his ability in the Force? Or should he axe the whole thing completely and insist on figuring out another way around the blockade. Before he could make up his mind, Rey poked a finger at him.

“That little guy, the green one,” she said, head tilted, “he told you backup would come, right? Well, how are they gonna get through the blockade if we don’t take the whole thing down? Those drones and droids learn, Ben, and if we manage to make it through without destroying all of them, they will recalibrate to fix whatever hole we manage to find.”

Groaning, because she had a point, Ben clenched his eyes closed.

“If we do, somehow, take down the entire blockade,” he said, staring at her with a hard expression, “we will effectively be announcing ourselves to whatever lies beyond it.”

Waving her hand at him again, Rey stood.

“Then we’ll figure out how to take them out too,” she said.

Ben jumped up, flush overtaking his face.

“It’s not that easy, Rey,” he said, voice trembling with the effort he was making not to yell. “We can’t just go in blind, we have to…”

“Have to what, Ben?” Rey scowled at him. She settled her fists on her hips and leaned into his space. “How do you propose we do recon on an area of space we can’t even see until we’re in it?”

“We can use a probe or” Ben started but Rey laughed in his face.

“A probe? On this ship?” She asked, gesturing to the interior of the Falcon around them.

“Fine, then,” Ben gritted, “we could use the infrared scanner.”

Rey was shaking her head at him before he could even finish speaking.

“Busted,” she said. “Was that way when I got the ship and I haven’t been able to get the parts to fix it yet.”

Ben growled. He clenched his own fists next to his hips.

“Alright,” he spat, “Then we will…”

Rey flapped her hand at him again and he fought the urge to slap it away.

“Nothing for it, we’ll just have to wait until we’re behind the line,” she said, cutting him off.

“But…” Ben started.

“Nothing will work until we get beyond the blockade.” Rey dismissed.

  
  


“Stop inter…” Ben tried again.

“No.” Rey said, smirking.

“It's like you get some sort of sick pleasure out of arguing with me!” Ben shouted, waving his hands in a way that was assuredly making him look like a lunatic.

Rey snorted.

“Of course I don’t.” She responded. Her grin turned positively wicked. “I get a very delicious type of pleasure out of arguing with you.”

Ben’s jaw dropped and he could only watch as she turned and walked away from him.

*****

Another hour later, Ben found himself begrudgingly leaving the cockpit to seek out Rey. While he still had his reservations about her plan, such that it  _ was  _ a plan, he hadn’t been able to come up with anything else that was close to feasible.

Perhaps if he demonstrated his Force abilities, she would realize her idea wouldn’t work and they could start working together to come up with something else.

Though the ship certainly wasn’t the size of a dreadnought, it still took a few minutes to locate her and when he did, he was unsurprised to find her elbow deep in the bowels of the ship’s systems panel. He watched her for a few minutes, more than a little impressed with how easily she manhandled the calibration lines into maximum efficiency. It was like she had been born with the knowledge of the inner workings of the  _ Falcon _ and that, for some reason, made Ben’s attraction to her ratchet up a few notches.

“Are you going to stand there spying on me all day or are you going to help?”

Her voice broke him from his reverie and Ben knelt down next to the hatch opening in the floor, peering down at her. A line of grease, starting at her fingertips and trailing up her arm over the wrapping she wore held his attention for a few more seconds than he cared to admit. When Rey cleared her throat, he looked up to find her smirking at him, one eyebrow raised.

“Right,” Ben cleared his throat and reached up unconsciously to brush his hair back over his burning ears, “I can do this demonstration, if you still want,” he said then held up a hand as though to caution her when she smiled widely, “but I want to warn you that the Force isn’t what you seem to think it is.”

Rey scowled at him. She leaned down to place her tools back in the caddy at her feet, giving him a nice view of her rear, and then pulled herself up out of the maintenance room to sit on the ledge across from him.

“And what,” she asked, still frowning and arms crossed over her chest, “do you think  _ I think _ the Force is?”

Alarms blared in Ben’s head at her tone. He chewed lightly on the inside of his mouth for a moment, stalling as he tried to work out how to answer her without increasing her ire.

“Well, I just mean...you spoke as though...uh…”

Nope. He couldn’t respond. Everything he thought of to say brought up images of her beating him over the head with her rather intimidating staff and so he just shut his mouth and squirmed. He reminded himself so much of his father after Han pissed off Leia that he nearly rolled his eyes in embarrassment.

Rey snorted. “That’s what I thought.” She stood then and beckoned him to follow her back to the main lounge of the ship. “Come on, Mountain, let’s have a gander at what you can do.”

“Mountain?” Ben asked, following obediently behind her, feeling as gangly and off-kilter as he had when he had been a lanky teenager.

Rey turned a positively evil grin on him.

“Mountain,” she nodded, “it works in so many ways, too.”

Ben blinked at her, confused. “What? Works how?”

Rey laughed. She turned more fully toward him, effectively walking backward at that point, and looked him up and down.

“Well,” her voice went sly, “you’re...rather large.” Ben was ashamed to admit his ego inflated somewhat at the way she said it, and was wholly unsurprised when she went on and burst his proud bubble. “And you are thick as stone.” She tapped her head in demonstration.

She laughed, no doubt amused by the irritation that was surely showing on his face.

“And,” she continued, smirking, “where I’m from, especially tall mountains are often referred to as a ben.”

Wait, what?

“Are you serious?” Ben asked, understandably skeptical.

“Seriously, serious, “Rey replied, winking.

In spite of her cheekiness, Ben knew she was telling the truth. It was a feeling, an instinct. Likely the Force, if he were being completely honest. Still, Mountain? What kind of absurd pet name was that?

Why did he even like the idea of her having a pet name for him, anyway?

They reached the lounge and Rey sprawled herself across the bench of the Dejarik table, crossing her arms behind her head and leaning back in a way that reminded Ben of his father. He stood a few feet away from her, shuffling and feeling suddenly very nervous.

Kriff, he really hoped he wasn’t about to make an ass of himself in front of her.

“So, we’ve already determined you can move things with your,” Rey grinned, “Force thingy.”

Ben glared at her but Rey ignored it.

She went on. “Does the size and weight of the object matter?”

Ben cocked his head at her. “Well, yes, of course. The larger and heavier the object, the more power it takes to manipulate it.”

He had apparently confirmed her suppositions because she nodded at him, though there was an air of...not fear, worry? Something was bothering her about it and Ben wanted to know what it was. Unfortunately, they didn’t have the time to veer off into a discussion about Rey’s uncomfortable reaction to the Force.

“And what about gravity?” She asked, throwing Ben, once again, off kilter, “does the presence or lack of gravity make a difference?”

The way she asked it made it clear she already knew the answer and was only asking for confirmation, again. Something about it made a little niggling thought click into place in Ben’s mind.

“Well, obviously if there is no gravity, the size and weight of the object would be affected. Trying to move a ship like the  _ Falcon _ , for instance, would be like trying to move a feather except, of course, you have to contend with the counterforce of the ship’s pilot pushing against your power.” Ben stopped for a moment, shifting through his thoughts as he fell further into academic mode. “The reason Force users can’t take out a fleet of ships simply by using the Force to send them careening into planets or stars is the fact that ships are powered and maneuvered by people. And while we could, theoretically, try to manipulate the people it is extremely difficult to do unless you are there with them or, at least, looking at and speaking to them through the holo.”

That nagging thought was joined by another.

“So what you’re saying,” Rey spoke up, “is that if there is no intelligent force behind an object driving its actions, you could potentially have no issue manipulating it into, say, a new trajectory?”

The niggling thought exploded and Ben suddenly felt very stupid.

“The blockade has no intelligent life form controlling it,” he whispered, vision blurring as he stared at nothing. “I could use the Force to, “his gaze snapped back to Rey who was looking very pleased with herself, “to redirect the fire of the droids and drones onto the cannons and vice versa. We could make the blockade destroy itself.”

Rey jumped up, excited.

“You wouldn’t even have to go that far,” she said, “once I see the blockade for myself, I can pinpoint which few pieces to redirect to make the largest impact, just like when you recalibrate the lithium processor in a droid. You don’t have to redo the whole thing if you know what the most impactful areas to change are. So,” she clapped her hands, “lets try a few scenarios.”

Ben watched her as she pulled out some tools, a few boxes of ration bars, a stack of plates and some larger crates and assembled them in various positions on the open floor space in the lounge. While he was still kicking himself for missing something so obvious, he marvelled at Rey’s brilliance. For an obscure mechanic living on a pirate queen’s planet, she had an impressive natural talent for seeing things in the abstract and forcing reality to fit it...and a rather sophisticated understanding of battle strategy.

Ben ws suddenly very, very glad Rey hated the First Order. Had she aligned with their cause, he was sure she would have been an extremely effective, extremely dangerous opponent.

“Alright,” Rey nudged one of the crates with her foot, sliding it minutely to the left, “here’s our blockade. Let’s start by focusing on the asteroid cannons, “she pointed to the large crates spaced out between the rest of the items on the floor, “I want to work through turning those on the field mines,” she pointed to plates, “and using the blast from those to take out the drones and droids” she gestured toward the boxes of rations and the tools, respectively.

Ben nodded. That sounded like the most efficient plan, by far, and he shrugged out of his jacket. Once he finished rolling up his sleeves, he looked up at Rey to ask her what she wanted him to do first only to find her staring at his arms with a look that made his gut clench with desire. The noise from his sharp intake of breath seemed to shake her from her trance and she looked away, blushing.

“First,” she coughed and then cleared her throat, “move the asteroid cannons so they face inward toward the field mines. We’ll pretend the labels on the boxes are the firing ends of the cannons.”

And so it went. They worked for hours on various scenarios, Rey moving the boxes and tools and other objects of their mock-up blockade into different positions every so often and directing him to focus his Force energy on different pieces of the blockade each time. When the eighth hour of their ten hour trip into the Unknown Regions rolled around, they had managed to come up with a good five solid plans, depending on how, exactly, the various machines within the blockade were spread out.

Rey rolled her shoulders and stretched her neck side to side. Her eyes were drooping somewhat and Ben realized that, while he had managed to get some semblance of rest while meditating earlier, Rey had not slept for at least twelve hours.

“Get some sleep,” he said. “You can take the captain’s bunk.”

Rey didn’t even try to argue. She simply nodded and then asked, “i don’t suppose there's a refresher in there?”

Ben grinned. “Sweetheart, that cabin has a real shower, with water.”

Rey’s eyes widened and she whooped out an excited shout before scurrying off toward the aforementioned cabin. Ben waited a few minutes until he heard the tell-tale shudder of the water pipes through the durasteel, then headed back to the cockpit, intent on catching a few minutes of real sleep himself.

When he got there, however, he immediately noticed the holo-comm flashing and hurried over to accept the incoming transmission. Master Yoda’s wrinkled eyes and serious smile greeted him.

“On their way toward the Unknown Regions, your family is,” the little Jedi said, “speak with you, they would.”

Yoda reached over to something Ben could not see. He looked up at Ben, however, and stated, “Help, coming is,” and then the holo went black for a moment before his mother’s worried face sprang up.

“Ben!” She cried, “Where are you? What are your coordinates? Stay there, we’ll come and rendezvous.”

“And how the hell did you find my ship?” Han yelled from behind her, looking like a kid in a sweets shop.

Ben shook his head. He patched his coordinates through to his mother’s ship,  _ The Raddus _ , and smirked at his father.

“Not your ship any more, old man,” he wiggled his eyebrows, “finder’s-keeper’s.”

Han huffed out a disbelieving laugh at that. Ben turned back to his mother.

“I can’t wait for you mom, you know that,” he said, turning serious, “I’m less than two hours out and still have to make it through the blockade. We don’t have time for you to catch up. If all goes to plan, though, you and the Jedi ships that Master Yoda is sending should be able to get through without issue.”

“And your grandfather,” Leia responded, agreeing with his assessment, “he’s already called out Cassian’s Rogue One team and Jyn’s Stardust troops. We shouldn’t be far behind you. On that note,” she levelled him with a look that left him squirming, “how  _ do  _ you plant on getting through the blockade?”

Ben swallowed down his guilt while saying, “I’ve come up with a plan. It will work. You just need to trust me.”

He didn’t know why he didn’t want to tell his parents, or anyone really, about Rey just yet. Something, something a little bit selfish he had to admit, had him wanting to keep her all to himself, if only for a little while longer.

It was clear that his mother was suspicious of his intentionally vague answer but, fortunately, she didn’t question him on it further. Instead, she redirected the conversation to the layout of Starkiller and they discussed what weapons and explosives the  _ Falcon  _ had on board. After several minutes, though, Ben’s exhaustion began to seep through enough for even his father to notice. With words of love and promises to see one another soon, the transmission was ended and Ben leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes.

He was asleep in seconds.

*****

_ The firelight made the tears on her face sparkle against her tanned skin, turned somewhat pale by what she had just gone through. He ached for her. The loneliness that was threatening to overwhelm her was one with which he was all too familiar. _

_ “I’ve never felt so alone.” _

_ He ached. _

_ “You’re not alone.” _

_ She looked up at him, hope blooming ever so cautiously in her eyes. _

_ “Neither are you.” _

_ And for the first time in his life, he believed it. _

*****

The screech of the proximity alarm jolted Ben from his slumber. He pushed aside the dream, unsure of what it was supposed to mean, if it meant anything at all, and focussed on bringing the ship out of hyperspace. They came out just inside the invisible barrier that marked the beginnings of the Unknown Regions. The site that met Ben’s eyes had him gasping in horror.

“That,” Rey whispered from behind him before coming around and settling in the co-pilot’s seat, “is massive.”

They stared, both in terrified awe, at the sheer expanse of the blockade before them. It went on as far as the eye could see and then even further. Several levels thick and spread in a way that ensured attempting to go around would end very, very badly for the pilot who tried, the blockade was unlike anything Ben had ever encountered before.

He gulped and turned to Rey. She looked back at him but the fear he expected to see wasn’t there. She looked even more determined than ever.

“Give me a tic,” she said, “I need to map this out somewhat and then, we get started.”

Her resolve bolstered Ben’s own.

“Sounds good, Sweetheart,” he responded with a lazy smirk.

Rey huffed and punched him in the arm as she stood up to take in the view. Ben rubbed the spot absentmindedly while he waited. The dream came back to him as he watched her and he wondered why it had felt so real.

Almost…

Almost like a memory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, when you consider AD's stature and the fact that ben does actually mean mountain or mountain peak...it is hilarious to me. Seriously, look it up! Noun; Scot, Irish - a mountain peak; high hill


	4. How Many Idiots Does It Take?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This...might be the longest chapter of the entire series thus far. Or, at least, one of the longest. There was a lot I needed to put in this one, though, so I hope it isn't too jumbled.
> 
> Thank you to everyone reading, leaving kuddos and commenting! I cannot tell you how much I appreciate it. I hope you are enjoying it and that this chapter was worth the wait!
> 
> EDIT: Sorry! I just realized when I copied and pasted a little bit was left out. It's too important, I think, to just leave as-is. It happens at the part where Ben and Rey's new friend has just completed his own mission. I put astriks around the part that was erroneously left out for those of you who have already read this without it.

Rey was good at many things. Working on ships and droids and other machines came as naturally as breathing to her. Adapting to new places and languages was something she had been doing for so long, it wasn’t even mildly difficult. Fighting? She liked to think she was rather good at that as well.

But trusting people, getting to know them and letting them get to know her? That, she had a very, very hard time with.

How could she, after what had happened to her, to her parents? Though she didn’t remember a whole lot of her early childhood, she did remember her mother’s smile and her father’s laughter. She remembered playing in beautiful gardens and snuggling up in front of a warm fire in her parent’s laps while they read to her from massive, old tomes.

She also remembered their fear. She remembered running. She remembered watching them die. And though she had escaped the same fate, something she knew her parents would be glad for, she still felt a niggling of guilt. Survivor’s guilt, Maz had called it.. Finding herself on a pirate’s ship after wandering the wilderness for several days only to get sold into slavery to Unkar Plutt had further eroded her trust in others. She made it though. She survived and when she was fourteen she had stolen a ship from Plutt and left Jakku behind like so much garbage.

Travelling from planet to planet over the next couple of years had cemented Rey’s belief that most people couldn’t be trusted and it was only when she met Maz a few years ago that someone finally was able to break through some of her carefully erected walls. Though not by much. While Rey did trust Maz, to an extent, and even called her a friend and cared for her, she also knew that Maz was one in a billion. Maz let Rey be, allowing her a safe haven to work on the machines she felt so connected to while not having to interact with many other people most of the time.

So why Ben? Why did she already trust him and so completely too? Why did his presence put her at ease? Why was she dreaming about him? Dreams that felt so, so real?

_“You’re not alone.”_

Why did being with Ben feel like coming home?

“Rey?”

Ben’s voice broke her away from her thoughts. She gave one last scan of the blockade before them and turned around.

“I think we need to go with our original plan. Target the cannons, aim them at the field mines and let the blasts from those take care of the drones and droids. Any that manage to avoid the mines we can take out with the _Falcon’s_ guns.”

Ben was nodding along before she even finished. He looked up at her.

“You’re gonna have to fly, Sweetheart,” he said, making her traitorous heart flutter. “I need to focus on the Force first, get those cannons turned and set them to fire. I’ll take to the guns once we get them going.”

Rey heaved in a shuddering breath. She could do that. She’d been flying this ship for years. What was one little blockade to contend with, really?

“I got it,” she said, jerking her head in a nod.

Ben smiled at her, dimples popping. Rey almost hated herself for nearly swooning.

“I know,” Ben replied.

Rey shivered. Those words, so simple yet she couldn’t help but feel like there was a lot more to them than a mere agreement. She turned away from him and plopped down in the captain’s chair, rolling her eyes at him as she did. Ben stepped over to the area between the pilot and copilot’s seats, closed his eyes, and raised one hand out in front of him.

Rey looked away, busying herself with unimportant things: checking the fuel gauge, rechecking the lightspeed calibration, anything to distance herself from what Ben was doing.

And that was another thing! How could she trust someone who...someone who…

_The Force!_

Kriff! Why was trusting him so instinctive when he was a person who could do _that_?

Rey pushed her own thoughts away. They didn’t have time for her to break down. Not now.

The first blast sounded and Rey’s head shot up. The cannons were firing out into the field mines, setting off a chain reaction and many of the droids and drones were getting caught in the cross-fire. She jumped when Ben clapped a hand down on her shoulder. Looking up at him, she caught his smirk and wink before he was out of the cockpit and racing down the hall to the gunnery. Rey sucked in a deep breath and hit the throttle.

*****

If anyone asked Rey what it was like to pilot the _Millennium Falcon_ through a self-destructing blockade, dodging blast and avoiding the few drones that were left to fire on her, she would have said, “I don’t know.”

It wasn’t that she was out of it while flying or that she went into some sort of zone. Or maybe she had because she honestly couldn’t remember. The moment Ben called out to her from the gunnery to “hit it”, Rey just flew. Any terror or excitement or even anger was brushed aside in favor of simply staying alive. Ben’s voice coming through the com was little more than a light buzz in her ear. It took almost half an hour to make it to the end of the blockade and by that time, Rey was so wound with tension it took Ben returning to the cockpit and pulling on her arms before she could release the controls.

“You were amazing, Rey,” he said softly, “Truly.”

Rey did the only thing she could in that moment. She laughed. Her laughter grew to heaving barks when Ben gently steered the ship around and they took in the destruction they had left in their wake.

“Kriff,” she shouted. “We did it!”

But when she turned to Ben to share in her relief and joy with him, she found him looking at something in the Starkiller files that had him rolling his mouth in that already familiar way.

“What is it?” She asked, worry taking over and her laughter subsiding.

Ben worked his mouth even harder, drawing Rey’s attention to how plush and soft his lips looked. She flushed at wondering what it would feel like to have them brush against her own.

“Starkiller’s scanners are set up to catch anything flying slower than lightspeed within a twenty persec radius of the planet.” He said.

Rey scrunched her nose and shrugged.

“So, that sounds normal. We can probably find a hole in their system and sneak in.”

Ben bit his lip. “I found one,” he stated, “but you probably won’t like it.”

Rey cocked her head at an angle, side-eyeing him.

“And what, exactly, won’t I like?” She asked.

Ben hesitated for a few moments, then motioned for her to trade places with him. Reluctantly, Rey decided to let him take over flying.

“Ben?” She prompted. When he didn’t reply, she watched him as he steered the ship on and then reached for the lightspeed switch. “Uh, Ben? What are you doing?”

Ben cleared his throat.

“We, uh,” he stuttered, then continued more firmly, “We’re gonna have to go in at lightspeed.”

Rey blinked at him.

“You mean, get closer to the planet at lightspeed?” Okay?

Ben fidgeted in his seat.

“Go in,” he forced out.

Rey blinked again then jumped from her seat, shouting.

“You mean to tell me you’re going to fly into the planet’s atmosphere at lightspeed? Are you out of your damned mind, Solo?”

Ben ignored her and set about inputting the landing sequence. Rey, realizing he was dead serious, scrambled back to her seat and buckled in.

“If you kill us, I will hate you forever,” she spit at him and felt a wave of smugness when he flinched.

“Noted,” he replied stiffly.

Rey gripped the arms of her seat, debating with herself over whether she should close her eyes (yes!) or keep them open (don’t be a coward!). In the end, she decided that if Ben had to watch as they came into atmo at lightspeed, so did she.

Even if it was his hairbrained idea to begin with.

The fact that she knew she would never have trusted anyone else to pull such a maneuver, that she would never have willingly put her life in the hands of anyone but Ben...well, she did her best to shove the thought away.

She watched, breath catching in her chest, as the _Falcon_ shifted from the calm that came from hovering in deep space to the disconcerting feeling of being at a standstill while traveling just slightly faster than the speed of light. Almost imperceptibly, she could hear Ben next to her, counting in a soft whisper. When he reached five, he threw the lightspeed toggle into the off position and immediately jerked the throttle to the left. It was in that moment that Rey realized she had been watching him instead of looking through the view portal. When she turned, she gasped. The tops of trees slapped against the hull, sending clouds of snowdust to the ground below. The sun, still rather high in the sky, almost appeared to be flickering. The burn of acid that rose from Rey’s stomach at the thought of what that could mean made her sick.

The First Order was already powering up the laser cannon with the power of the nearby sun.

“Breath, Rey,” Ben muttered.

Startled, Rey sucked in gulps of air, finally aware that she had been holding her breath. She turned to look, once more, at Ben. She watched the play of his muscles under his thin white shirt as he piloted the ship over the terrain, desperately trying to slow down enough to land safely. The grit of his jaw and the tension in his brow spoke to his depth of concentration. Rey had only a moment of warning when a smirk stole over his mouth and her stomach dropped along with the ship as Ben pushed the ship into a deep dive before flipping them up and back around in a series of loop-de-loops. Gradually, they slowed and on the tail of the ninth loop, he evened out the ship and guided them into a much gentler landing than she had been expecting, right on the edge of a snow-covered cliff.

The cockpit was silent for several minutes as the pair sat in shock. Shock that they had made it through the blockade. Shock that they had just entered a planet’s atmosphere at lightspeed. Shock that they were still alive.

Rey felt her muscles cramp from the tension that had coiled in them during the ordeal. Then, her hands started to shake, followed quickly by the rest of her body. She couldn’t breath.

Gentle hands on her knees snapped her out of her stupor. Her own hands flew out and her fingers snagged on Ben’s shirt, clenching and pulling him minutely closer. He stumbled in his crouched position in front of her, squeezing her thighs as he corrected his balance. Rey found herself trapped by his gaze. His eyes, so soft and concerned, made her heart clench.

“That was some damned good flying, Solo,” she managed to stutter while she slowly relaxed.

Ben grinned at her, wide and free.

“I aim to please,” he replied with a wink. “Besides, you did promise to hate me if I let you die and I much prefer you alive and snarking at me.”

The flush that rose in Rey’s cheeks was hot. Embarrassed and not sure why, Rey shoved Ben back until he fell on his arse, laughing.

“Shut up,” she muttered, standing and making her way out of the cockpit.

  
*****

Rey yanked the hem of her jacket down for the dozenth time. Though it was warm, it was much too small.

“It belonged to my mother,” Ben had said as he handed the jacket to her, along with some snow boots and gloves.

Leia Organa had to be at least a half a foot shorter than Rey and tiny everywhere because not only was the jacket too short and tight on the shoulders, the gloves barely went over her hands and the boots were so small that she had to curl her toes a little to make them work. Still, this was better than trying to traverse the snow-covered planet of Starkiller Base in her desert garb. No doubt she would have been a popsicle by now without the cold-weather gear.

Rey shimmied her hips, attempting to adjust the pants Ben had given her as they began to ride up her backside. These had been his, apparently, from when he was “a boy of about twelve”, according to him. Even though twelve year old Ben had been taller than an adult Leia and the clothes suited Rey’s stature much better than the insanely small white snowsuit (also Leia’s) that she had tried to contort herself into, it was still a tight fit.

A muffled groan behind her had her turning to glance at Ben over her shoulder. His cheeks were pink and his eyes were planted firmly on her derriere. Rey flushed, again, and reached back to smack him in the shoulder.

“How much further?” She asked, trying to redirect both of their attention away from her ass and back to the task at hand.

She stopped for a moment, allowing Ben to step up next to her.

“The base proper should be just over the crest of this hill,” he said, waving a massive hand in the general direction of where they were headed. “I can feel several hundred life-forces from there.”

Rey cringed. She turned her head away in an attempt to to disguise her unease with his casual mention of...his powers.

“Come on.”

Ben tapped his fingers against hers, not daring to take her hand apparently, and continued on.

Rey followed. She shoved her gloved hands into the pockets of her borrowed jacket in a bid to keep from reaching out to clasp her hand in Ben’s and focused on putting one foot in front of the other. Walking through the snow was so very different from the sand dunes of Jakku or the gnarled forest floor of Takodana. While she was used to the careful navigation required for shifting sands and limb-littered forests, snow was another matter all-together. Gritting her teeth in irritation as yet another step left her feet sinking inches deep into the pretty white powder, Rey forced herself to move, even as her legs began to tire.

They walked for nearly two miles before finally reaching one of the smaller metal buildings belonging to the base proper. Rey rolled her eyes at Ben’s back when he motioned for her to stay behind him, shadowed by the building’s outer wall. He slipped around the corner toward the door they had seen on the walk up and Rey moved to follow. She stopped short, still hidden behind the wall, when she saw Ben standing still. Though there was no tension in his form, his hands were up and he was staring dead ahead.

“Who are you?” Rey heard a voice ask, the soft rolling cadence male but similar to her own.

“Better question,” Ben replied, his deeper tone sending shivers down her spine, “who are you? You don’t look like First Order, not in that get-up.”

Rey peeked around the wall to get a better look at the stranger. She spied a tall, thin man facing Ben, holding a blaster aimed directly at Ben’s chest. The man wore a mishmash of clothes in blacks, greys and browns. His head was covered by a brown fur cap that came down in flaps over his ears, strings meant to be tied together dangling against the shoulders of his long, grey overcoat. A black shirt and darker grey trousers peeked out from within the coat. His bright green eyes held a hint of steel in them as he looked Ben over, a slight sneer marred his otherwise handsome face.

“I would never consort with those monsters,” the man spat, his indignation making him fairly quiver at the thought. A moment later, and with a hesitant shift of his hand against his blaster, the man lowered his weapon. “I suppose that means you aren’t First Order either.” He eyed Ben’s own clothes and then smirked, “not with that get-up.”

Ben huffed out a laugh. “No, we aren’t.”

Rey took that as her que to join them and stepped around the corner. The stranger jolted, minutely, and fingered his blaster but relaxed when Rey came fully into view. He eyed her as well, quirking a brow at her obviously too small clothing.

“I didn’t realize the Resistance was doing so poorly on funding,” he said, smirking. He looked back at Ben then. “Or am I wrong? You are with the Resistance, correct?”

“Yes,” Ben said, neither denying nor acknowledging the other man’s jibe about the financial state of the Resistance.

An odd sort of tension played through the air until Rey tired of the posturing by the two men and stepped forward to stand nearly in front of Ben.

“I’m Rey,” she said and tossed her head in Ben’s direction, “and his name is Ben.”

The man’s attention snapped once more from Rey to Ben.

“Ben? As in...Ben Solo?” He asked, sounding strangely giddy and irritated at the same time.

Ben sighed. “Yes, that’s me. But you still haven’t told us who you are.”

The man shifted his feet, looking decidedly uncomfortable. Rey thought the action out of character from what she had already gleaned about the man. He didn’t seem like the type to let any feelings of awkwardness or insecurity show.

“You may call me Armitage,” he said, finally. His tone firm and Rey knew not to ask for more than that.

Ben clearly didn’t know or didn’t care.

“Armitage who?” He asked while crossing his arms over his chest.

Rey rolled her eyes again.

“We’re here to destroy the base,” she said, saving any argument that might have sprung up from Ben’s lack of tact. “Since you aren’t with the First Order, I presume you’re here working against them as well?”

Armitage’s eyes grew wide, then he threw his head back and laughed.

“Destroy the base? The two of you? Alone?” He asked while still guffawing, pointing between them as thought to confirm the ludacris thought.

Rey felt Ben shift behind her. She reached back and put a hand on his hip, stilling him.

“Yes, the two of us. Unless you want to help,” she replied, trying to keep her ire out of her tone.

Armitage seemed taken aback by her proposal. He sniffed, as though finding the mere suggestion that he aid them to be beneath him.

“I don’t care about the base,” he said, “my purpose here is personal.”

Opinion of this man souring even further, Rey bit out, “They are going to fire on the Hosnian System in less than an hour.”

That seemed to send him into a state of shock. He turned his head toward the still flickering sun and then looked back at Rey. His Adam's apple bobbed and Rey could tell he was having an argument with himself as his eyes shifted between her, the sun, the base and Ben. The hand not holding the blaster came up from where it had been hanging at rest at his side and stroked over the breast of his coat. Rey could make out the shape of a small object that must have been hidden away in an internal pocket there as his fingers moved over the heavy fabric. He gulped again and closed his eyes. He took several deep breaths, mouth flicking between a myriad of distinct scowls before settling on a resigned frown. With a heavy sigh, he looked back at Rey.

“Very well,” he conceded, “I shall assist you in this.”

*****

Armitage knew the base well. When Ben asked, he simply told them that he had been fortunate enough to come across plans for it in the early years of its construction. He led them through the outer buildings, across a small training ground and through an underground shaft that opened up in a hallway just outside of the main power-supply.

“We need to get through that set of doors there,” Armitage said, nodding at the massive durasteel gates at the other end of the hall from where they stood. “The power generators and the controls to the sun-syphoning mechanism are in there. Unfortunately, I do not have the access codes necessary to open them.”

Ben frowned. Rey looked to him, hoping he might be able to come up with a solution but before she could speak, another voice called out.

“Halt!”

The modulation apparatus of the Stormtrooper’s helmet made the voice sound like crunching gravel. The three turned to spy a single Trooper standing behind them, brandishing a mop.

Rey blinked and snorted out a laugh. Horrified, she clapped a hand over her mouth. The Stormtrooper seemed to wilt at her giggles and he dropped the arm holding the mop. The three of them stood there for a moment, observing the Trooper as he dithered in place. Then, he let out a surprised gasp. Stunned, they watched him drop the mop completely and reach up to take off his helmet. His dark skin and hair were slick with sweat from wearing the heavy uniform but his eyes were what startled Rey the most.

He looked enraptured. He looked gleeful.

He was looking straight at Ben.

Rey felt a moment of completely unnecessary and unwanted jealousy shoot through her. To her complete mortification, she took a half step to the right, placing herself between Ben and the Trooper. She could hear Ben’s amused snort behind her and shivered when he reached out to settle one of his hands against her side. He squeezed gently and her anger deflated.

“You…” the Stormtrooper began, voice heavy with awe, “You’re Ben Solo!”

“Uh,” Ben coughed. “Yes.”

The Stormtrooper moved toward them, arm stuck out as though to shake Ben’s hand. Rey stepped back, colliding with Ben.

“Oh wow,” the Trooper continued, arm falling, “You’re General Ben Solo, of the Resistance! I’m FN-2187. Oh man, it’s...this...wow!”

Rey could almost hear Ben’s embarrassment at the Trooper’s clear hero worship. 

The Stormtrooper, FN-2187, frowned then. He shifted on his feet once more.

“Umm, what are you doing here?” He asked.

Armitage huffed and moved forward

“We’re going to destroy this weapon of a planet,” he raised his blaster and aimed it at FN-2187, “and you are right on time. Open those doors.” He jutted his chin out toward the doors down the hall.

FN-2187’s eyes grew so enormous, Rey was almost afraid they would pop right out of his head. He looked back at Rey and Ben.

“You...you’re going to...oh...oh man...uh…”

He didn’t seem to know what to do. It was clear that this particular Trooper was not exactly a First Order “True Believer” but he also didn’t seem too sure about helping them. Out of the corner of her eye, Rey saw Ben reach over and lower Armitage’s blaster.

“No need for threats, Armie,” he said. An outraged squeak escaped Armitage’s throat at the nickname. “I think FN-2187 will help us. He seems to be a good man. Aren’t you, FN-2187?”

“I am a good man,” FN-2187 stated, sounding unsure. Then, he straightened his spine, “I _am_ a good man. I’ll help you.”

Rey sighed in relief. Quickly, the four moved together toward the doors and waited while FN-2187 entered his access code in a keypad next to a smaller door just to the left.

“Um, this is the maintenance access point,” he said, somewhat embarrassed.

Rey realized then that this Stormtrooper was likely a janitor or some such staff of the base and not a battle Trooper. The thought made her soften toward him, just a bit. Once the door was open, they filed in. As Rey passed FN-2187, she reached over and gave his shoulder a squeeze.

“Thank you,” she said softly.

The Trooper beamed at her and then followed her into the control room.

“Right,” Armitage said, “we’re here, now what?”

Ben hefted the pack he’d been carrying down onto the floor. He opened it and pulled out some blast explosives, handing one over to Rey.

“We attach these to the Beryllium tanks. Once we’re clear of the building, we set off the charge and blast the things into the next galaxy.” Ben handed a few more to Rey, then turned to Armitage and FN-2187. “Make sure to stick them near the center of the tank along the seam where the metal is weakest.”

The two other men nodded and they all set to work. Rey raced around the tanks in the furthest corner of the room, breathing shallowly to keep her heart from racing it’s way right out of her chest. She placed the last of her explosives and went to see if the others needed help. She found Armitage first but was able to see Ben and FN-2187 easily from their position.

“Here, I’ll take a few,” she said, reaching out to let Armitage hand her some of his burden.

“Well, well, well,” a voice snarled behind them, “what do we have here?”

Rey and Armitage turned. She felt her companion stiffen next to her. The man that had spoken was older, hair a salt-and-pepper and frown lines etched deeply into the skin around his mouth. His First Order uniform was starched and ironed to within an inch of its life but even that was not as stiff as the man’s posture. Rey thought he looked almost like a statue with how taut his stance was. He had his hands clasped behind his back, clearly considering them no threat.

“A little rat,” the man sneered, looking at Armitage, “and it appears you’ve picked up a whore.”

Armitage growled then, hackles raised, and he moved to block Rey from the man’s view.

“Shut up, you bastard!” He screamed.

Rey didn’t know what shocked her more, the fact that Armitage had come to her defense so readily or the fact that he had lost his cool so quickly.

The First Order officer just laughed; cold, like an iceberg slicing through ice laden waters. It made Rey tremble, just a bit.

“Bastard?” He asked Armitage. “The only bastard here is you.” 

Rey felt white-hot anger course through her at the hateful words. Her stomach dropped at what he said next.

“Isn’t that right, son?”

Rey reeled. This man...was Armitage’s father?

“Rey!” Ben called, running over. “Armie!”

The man turned to look at Ben. His brow scrunched and Rey could tell he was trying to place Ben, as though he had seen him before. While his attention was taken by Ben, Armitage struck. Faster than Rey realized he could move, he had reached into his coat and lunged at the man. They fell to the ground, trading punches and rolling across the floor like a couple of scrappy schoolboys. They kicked and scratched and tossed hateful insults back and forth. They were both more than a little unhinged. Then, Armitage attempted to stab the man with the small object in his hand. The man kicked him in the side, knocking him away, and rolled to his feet in a move far more agile than a man his age should be able to pull off.

“Still trying to kill me then, Armitage?” The man sneered, brushing his hands over his coat and straightening his collar. “When will you understand? You will never best me, disgusting failure of a child. You will never…”

The man choked on his next words. A white foam bubbled around his lips and out of his mouth. His eyes rolled back in his head and he let out a series of painful sounding grunts. Then, he collapsed. Armitage grinned, evilly Rey thought with a shudder, and wiped a spot of blood from where his father had jabbed him in the mouth.

“I just did, arsehole,” he spat and stood up, displaying the empty syringe in his hand.

“Are you two alright?” Ben asked, walking over calmly now that the danger was past.

Rey nodded. Armitage closed his eyes, sucking in a deep breath. He looked at them, smiling.

“I have never felt so good, in all my life,” he stated.

Ben nodded at him, smiling wryly.

“So, Armitage Hux, then, is it?” He said.

Armitage shrugged. “Brendol Hux was my...father, I suppose. Genetically speaking only, of course.”

Rey patted Armitage on the shoulder. She couldn’t imagine what it might have been like for Armitage to have a parent like that man. She was only grateful that he had not turned out to be like his father.

*Ben shook his head. "I'm sorry, I can't imagine..." he trailed off, wincing.

"Can't imagine what Ben?" Rey asked, concerned over the sudden cloud that had taken over his face.

Ben looked at her, brow furrowed, "I was going to say I can't imagine what it would be like, being on the opposite side of the war from my parents but..." he cringed and then shook his head again.

Rey opened her mouth to ask what had come over him but was interrupted.*

FN-2187 jogged up to them, huffing and out of breath. He had removed his white armor and was left clad in black fatigues and black boots.

“Last ones in place,” he said, stooping and resting his hands on his knees.

“Great,” Ben responded, “Now let’s get the kriff out of here.”

Together, the four of them moved up a gangway toward a hanger door that led back outside. Rey shot a glare at Ben and waved her hand at the now visible _Falcon_ , resting on a cliff barely a click from their current position.

“You took us the long way to get into this stupid base, you nerfherder,” she spat, irritated.

Ben grinned down at her and shoved his hands into his trouser pockets.

“Sorry about that Sweetheart,” he said, “I guess I was a little...distracted.”

Rey suddenly remembered Ben’s continuous stare at her arse as they walked through the snow and she growled at him. His smile widened.

“If you two are done,” Armitage said with a heavy eye roll, “We really need to get out of here.”

Rey snorted and turned away from Ben, marching through the hanger door. The men followed her, cautiously, and they made it over the landing strip and halfway down the hill beneath the base but came to a sudden halt at the vision of an entire platoon of Stormtroopers waiting for them. The group, clad all in white, was nearly invisible to them, save for the black of their blasters. They were standing at attention behind a man cloaked in black and red, ferocious looking helmet on his head making him look decidedly menacing.

“Get to the _Falcon_ ,” Ben whispered at Rey, “don’t stop. Just get to the ship and take off. Hit the charge once you’re on board.” He shoved the blast charge into Rey’s hands.

“Excuse me?” She said, trying to keep her voice low. “You...I am not leaving you, Ben Solo!”

Ben whirled on her. Even though his eyes were trained on Rey’s, she could tell he was still keeping tabs on their enemies that stood less than a hundred yards away.

“Yes, you will,” Ben’s tone brooked no argument. “Leave. Now!”

Rey felt a hand around her bicep attempting to pull her away.

“Best do as he says, darling,” Armitage whispered, “Solo knows what he’s doing.”

“Um, maybe we should do as he says, Rey,” FN-2187 said nervously.

Rey narrowed her eyes at Ben. Then, she clasped Armitage’s hands around the charge and shoved him and FN-2187 back.

“Go,” she said firmly, “I am not leaving him. Hit the charge as soon as you’re on the loading ramp and then get out of here.”

“Rey.” Ben didn’t sound angry, more resigned.

Armitage glanced between them, then nodded once. He pulled FN-2187 by the sleeve and moved toward the other side of the hill where they could climb down and around the waiting Troopers. He pulled his blaster from his holster.

“We won’t be leaving without you,” he said just before they got out of hearing range, “So you had better win this quickly.”

Once they were gone, Rey looked at Ben. He was scowling at her, brow furrowed in anger and not a little worry. Rey grinned at him.

“So, what’s the plan?” She asked.

*****

The plan, as it turned out, hadn’t actually been a plan at all. Ben had just smirked at her and, with a shrug, said, “Don’t die.”

Rey hit another Trooper over the head with her staff and twirled in place, shooting two more in rapid succession with her blaster. She dropped to her knees and swung her staff out, catching a Stormtrooper in the legs and sending him careening back into a small group of his buddies. Firing off a volley of shots, Rey hit each Trooper as they fell over one another. She chanced a glance over at Ben, who was having a much easier time against a group of Troopers while wielding the strangely beautiful weapon he had pulled from the holster strapped to his thigh.

“A lightsaber,” he had told her.

She no longer thought the weapon beautiful. It was the weapon of one of _them_. Nothing related to them could be beautiful.

And yet...Ben…

Rey shoved the thought away as forcibly as she shoved the Stormtrooper attempting to grab her. A sudden boom from the base behind her had her nearly toppling over. She glanced up and saw smoke rising from the control room but Ben’s curse confirmed what she already feared. It was something they had already considered a possibility. The number of explosives just wasn’t enough. The Beryllium tanks may have been destroyed but the blast wasn’t enough to set off the contents, which is what they had been relying on to completely annihilate the main power source.

They had failed.

Rey took some solace in the knowledge that Armitage and FN-2187 had apparently made it to the safety of the _Falcon_ , but that was all she could be grateful for as another group of Stormtroopers bore down on her. She struggled to keep moving, refusing to give them an easy target to shoot at, while still taking down as many of them as she could.

But she was running out of steam. Fast.

Another hit from the but of a Trooper’s blaster had Rey crumpling to the ground. Her stomach rolled from the pain but, fortunately, he had hit her in the back rather than the head. She spared a second to gain her bearings but a second was too long. She looked up into the business end of a blaster.

“Goodbye, rebel scum,” the Stormtrooper said.

A second later, he was blown away from her by the blast that came from the sky. Rey looked up. There were over a dozen X-Wings in the air, blasting at the Stormtroopers. Rey let go of the breath she was holding.

“Rey!”

Ben ran over to her and reached out, helping her to her feet.

“Come on,” he called, pulling her away from the fray. He pulled something from his jacket pocket, a small black box, and flicked the switch on it. “Black Leader to Red Leader, come in Red Leader.”

The box crackled and then a male voice came through.

“This is Red Leader, glad to know you aren’t dead Solo!”

“Fuck off, Poe,” Ben shouted over the sounds of laser fire and Troopers screaming. “You need to break away, get over to that cloud of smoke. That’s the power control. You need to hit the area with everything you’ve got. Ignite the Beryllium!”

“Beryllium!” The other man, Poe apparently, exclaimed. “Are you out of your mind? Do you know what that stuff can do when set off?”

Ben huffed out a laugh. “Yeah, which is why you’ve got to ignite it, Poe. We have to blast the entire planet to bits.”

“You’re crazy,” Poe said. After a moment of silence, he continued. “I love it. Rock and roll, buddy.”

Rey watched one of the X-Wings veer away from the fight and head toward the pillar of smoke reaching up into the rapidly darkening sky.

“Let’s go, Sweetheart,” Ben said with a gentle tug on her arm, “We don’t want to be here when that stuff goes off.”

Rey nodded and followed after him. They ran toward the _Falcon_ , hitting a copse of trees on the way but found themselves blocked yet again. The cloaked figure from before stood in front of them. Rey realized that she had lost sight of him after the fight began.

“Well, hey there, Liita Ren, how’s it going?” Ben slid into a cocky pose, mirroring his tone.

The being before them stiffened at it and stepped forward.

“You die today, Ben Solo,” the person responded, his voice modulator even more gravelly than FN-2187’s had been.

“I dunno about that, Ren,” Ben smirked, “not really feeling it, you know?” Subtly, he pushed Rey behind him. He widened the position of his legs and he bent ever so slightly into an aggressive fighter’s stance. “How about you take off that mask and face me, Force user to Force user?”

The being growled lowly but acquiesced. “Very well.” He took off his helmet, releasing the lock with a hiss. Rey stepped back once he was revealed. Though he looked mostly human, he had the distinct hair covering, eyes and ears of a Cathar. To be part Cathar and part human was almost unthinkable. The Cathar were a proud species that considered relations with other species disdainful.

This being would have been snubbed by other Cathar and his non-human traits would have made him a pariah amongst many human societies as well. Rey felt a burst of sympathy for him.

That sympathy died an agonizing death when her back hit a tree and she slumped down into the snow. The arsehole had used the Force to toss her away, like garbage.

“Rey!” Ben screamed and ran toward her.

Liita Ren intercepted him.

“Bad idea to turn your back on me, Solo,” he snarled, literally, and swiped at Ben with a vicious looking red saber.

Ben leapt back and parried, bringing the full force of his body weight with him and knocking Ren back a few feet. He continued on his offensive blast of strikes and blows before Ren leapt over him and swung on his downward arch, catching Ben in the arm.

Rey stood and tried to intervene, bringing her staff around to hit Ren in the head. He jumped away just in time and struck out at her. Ben stepped between them, the saber embedding itself in his side. Ben cried out in pain and fell to his knees. He reached out and pushed Rey back with the Force before getting to his feet again and stumbling over to Ren, swinging wildly now, his control waning. Ren kicked Ben in the side, causing him to scream again and sending his lightsaber into the air. It landed several feet away in a small bank of snow.

Rey watched, horrified, as Ren kicked Ben again, sending him to the ground. Ben’s body shook, then seemed to freeze in place at the wave of Ren’s hand. Liita Ren stalked around him, gloating and grinning maniacally. His red saber hung from his hand, dragging through the snow and sending up a sizzle of steam where it touched the wet earth.

Rey couldn’t breath.

Ben was going to die. Ben was going to _die_. Rey stood, frozen, as she watched Ren settled into position, standing over Ben, and raised his saber. A sob caught in Rey’s throat. The sheer terror of watching this man fall, of standing by and doing nothing as this man that she was beginning to feel so much for...she couldn’t do it. She couldn’t, wouldn’t, allow it.

She let go of her fear, she cast aside her doubts. She buried her anger and self-loathing and the terror of what it might all mean. For Ben, she would do anything.

And so, for the first time since she was eleven years old, Rey reached out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of trivia - Liita Ren was so named by Snoke because he was Snoke's second choice. Of course, Snoke wanted Ben but Ben's family was ready this time and saved him from that fate.
> 
> Liita means "Inferior" in Somali (according to my Somali neighbor). I thought it was fitting.


	5. The Ways of the Force

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have nothing to say...
> 
> except enjoy!

He hated this. 

Oh, Ben wasn’t afraid to die. In all honesty, being who he was almost guaranteed he would go sooner rather than later. No, what he hated was the abject fear and anguish in Rey’s eyes as she stared at him. She knew Ren was about to kill him just as well as he did and Ben hated how much he felt like he had failed her.

He wanted to call out to her. He wanted to tell her how sorry he was but Ren’s hold over him was too heavy on top of his injuries. The wound to his arm had been bad enough but the stab he had taken in his side when he had leapt between Liita Ren and Rey was already slowly killing him and with that, he was weakened just enough for Ren to freeze him to the ground.

Ben hated this.

He turned his eyes back to Rey, hoping to catch her gaze so he could at least be looking into beautiful hazel as Ren struck the killing blow. What he saw, however, when he caught her eyes with his own made him feel more at peace and more alive than he had ever felt in his life. Rey looked positively feral.

Ben watched, flabbergasted, as Rey nodded almost imperceptibly at him and lifted her arm. He would have jolted, had he not been frozen in place, when his lightsaber shot from the snowbank it had landed in and flew swiftly through the air to hit her palm with a resounding and satisfying smack.

What. The. Hell?

Rey grinned, wild and terrifying, and lifted the saber in a perfect fighting stance. Had Ben not known any better, he would have thought she had been fighting with the weapon for years. But...did he know better?

He couldn’t deny that he really did not know much about Rey, and her adverse reaction to the Force every time it was brought up, or every time he used it, was odd. She seemed to have a completely negative opinion of it, and yet.

And yet.

Ben, now free of Liita Ren’s hold what with the Dark Sider’s attention firmly on Rey, moved himself as quickly and quietly away as his injuries allowed, settling against a tree. While he didn’t know if Rey would be able to fight Ren with any sort of success, at least this gave him time to get help. He pulled the communicator from his pocket and sent out a distress signal, hoping someone would be able to reach them in time. A high screech had his head flying up and his attention riveted on the fight happening before him. Though the pain in his side was making him dizzy, he watched.

Rey had not been the one to cry out, that much was certain. Liita Ren’s normally yellowed complexion had turned a disturbing shade of orange in his anger. He was bleeding from one of his legs, down low, and Rey jumped from her crouch and swung Ben’s saber in a complicated arch-pattern. He felt a stirring of desire at seeing her wield his weapon.

“Well?” Rey taunted. She shifted one booted foot back in the thin layer of powder that covered the ground, her grin making her look a little mad in the head. She lifted her empty hand and crooked two fingers at Ren, nearly begging him to attack.

Ren snarled and vaulted forward, swinging his own saber at Rey’s head, then her torso. He missed as Rey spun around him and slashed a line across Ren’s back. He howled in anger. Ben’s vision began to blur. He slumped even more against the tree even as Ren finally succeeded in getting a hit on Rey. Ben’s last thought before he blacked out was that they needed to get some bacta on Rey’s shoulder.

*****

_ The air was cooler than usual, the sky darker. Ben huddled down in his hut, ignoring the joyous laughter and goings-on of his fellow students in favor of his studies. The book that Unc...Master Luke had leant him was written in a particularly ancient form of Shyriiwook, though why, Ben did not know. There had never been a Wookie Jedi, as far as Ben knew, so it was strange that there would be a Jedi text written in the language. Or, at least, a language so similar to Shyriiwook that Ben was steadily, if painstakingly, making his way through it one page at a time. _

_ The call of one of the other students for Master Luke to light a bonfire startled him. Ben shook his head and mouthed the words that came out of Luke’s mouth, as he knew what the answer would be. _

_ “It is time for rest, Padawan. Go now, to your huts, all of you.” _

_ Ben rolled his eyes. While he had no interest in the playtime of his fellow students he did not blame them for wanting a bit of revelry. They were mostly young, like him, and not well suited to the stoid lifestyle Luke attempted to acclimate them all to. Ben reasoned that he fared better than most simply because his nature leant to it. He was quieter, more naturally studious, and he enjoyed being alone over being in the company of others. _

_ “Hey, Solo,” someone said while entering his hut, “still working? Even now?” _

_ Ben sighed. Well, he did sometimes enjoy the company of this person. Jacyn was one of the few younger students that didn’t push (or tease) Ben for his hermit tendencies. While he did try to get Ben to join in and make friends from time to time, he generally adopted a ‘do as you please so long as you’re not hurting others’ attitude. It was one of the reasons Ben tolerated Jacyn. _

_ “Yes,” he replied, “Master Luke believes this tomb, and the knowledge it contains, will be of great importance to me, personally, and I intend to read all of it before I go to my progress meeting with him day after tomorrow.” _

_ The progress meeting. Ben hated them. Though Luke was his uncle by blood, he still treated Ben like a complete stranger most of the time. It was as though he thought showing any love or care for his sister-son would make him appear weak or, perhaps, like he was playing favorites. It had soured Ben’s affection for his uncle over the last few years since he was sent away to train with Luke and, now, Ben could hardly say with any honesty that he even loved the man any more. _

_ Ben had turned fifteen just a few days before. Luke had said nothing. Even worse, Ben’s parents had not bothered to comm him. Ben didn’t bother to try reaching out either. His fourteenth birthday had only ended in disappointment. But, then, which of his birthdays hadn’t ended that way? Ben honestly couldn’t remember. _

_ “Well,” Jacyn said, smiling jovially, “let me know when you’re done and we can spar or go for a hike or something. Nova?” _

_ Ben snorted at the newly popular slang term but nodded, “Sure, I’ll do that. Nova.” _

_ With that, Jacyn left and Ben went back to work. He continued reading and taking notations well into the night, until the wax of his candle was little more than a puddle and the breaking dawn found him slumped over his study table, fast asleep. _

_ ***** _

_ “ _ _ When I found you, I saw what all masters live to see: Raw, untamed power... and beyond that, something truly special.” _

_ He hunched his shoulders, bowing his head even more and straining his neck with the force of it. He waited, breath caught in his chest, for the pain that was surely going to follow his Master’s praise. For that was what always happened. Any time his Master gifted him with any sort of approval, pain swiftly followed. _

_ ***** _

_ Ben stared at his father, willing him to understand, begging him silently to do something. _

_ Han sighed and ran a hand through his rapidly greying hair. _

_ “Look, Kid,” he said, not able to meet Ben’s eyes, “I’m not gonna pretend to like it. I won’t even say I agree with it but...your mother...she gets…” Han waved a hand in Ben’s general direction, glancing up at him and then swiftly away, “you know, this stuff. If she thinks Luke is what you need…” _

_ Ben scowled. Typical. His father was useless. A coward. He didn’t care about anyone but himself, not even his only child, his son! _

_ The words whipped through Ben’s head, clouding his judgement and turning his mood even darker. He shoved himself out of his seat and stormed from the cockpit, shouting over his shoulder. _

_ “Fine, do what you want. You always do.” _

_ ***** _

Ben jolted. Another scream ripped through the night air, forcing his eyes open. Blearily, he could make out Rey and Liita Ren locked in battle, each doing their best to hold the other’s saber at bay. Their position reminded Ben of a dance his grandmother had taught him, long ago, and he nearly grinned. He watched Rey shove Ren back and swipe her saber, Ben’s saber, at Ren’s face as he fell. Ren cried out in agony and Ben could just see a line of bloody orange seep from Ren’s neck and chest beneath his tunic as he went down.

Ben smirked to himself as he closed his eyes once more.

*****

_ “I can show you the ways of the Force,” he said, staring down at her through the purple light of their clashing sabers. _

_ “The Force,” Rey whispered, then closed her eyes. _

_ He could feel it, the Force, gathering around her, settling inside her and running wildly through her body. When she reopened her eyes to look at him, he felt all air leave his lungs. _

_ For the first time in this fight, he was afraid. _

_ ***** _

_ “It was just a dream,” Leiah sighed, exhaustion making her more irritable than usual, “go back to bed.” _

_ Ben sniffled and hugged his Wookie-plush closer to his body. _

_ “But mama,” he said, little voice barely carrying in the darkness of his parent’s room. _

_ “Now, Ben,” his mother said sternly. _

_ Hot tears rolled down Ben’s cheeks as he turned away. Still scared of going back to his room where the monsters lay, he shuffled down the hall to the closet where C3-PO resided when he was off and replenishing his power. Ben slipped into the closet, lay down next to C3-PO on the floor and closed his eyes. _

_ His tears never stopped, even as sleep finally took him. _

_ ***** _

_ He realized it was raining, wherever she was, even if he could not see, hear or smell it. The fabric of her poncho slowly darkened as the water hit it, turning the once lighter grey dark. _

_ “I know everything I need to know about you,” she said, staring him down in anger. _

_ He stepped forward. “You do?” He swallowed, and then, “ah, you do. You have that look in your eyes, from the forest, when you called me a monster.” _

_ She answered, immediately, and with absolute surety, “You are a monster.” _

_ That hurt, far more than he cared to admit. But she wasn’t wrong. _

_ “Yes, I am.” _

_ ***** _

“Ben?”

A voice. Gentle. Fearful. Angry. Not at him though. No. Not at him.

“Ben? Please?”

He wanted to reassure them. Tell them he was alright.

“Please, please wake up. Please, Ben!”

_ ‘Shhhh. It’s okay, Sweetheart.’ _

“Ben, I don’t know what to do! Please!”

*****

_ He didn’t even register the pain in his side. The agony in his heart was too great for even his saber slicing through his flesh to overcome. Numb, he looked down. Rey looked devastated. Whether it was because of what they had both just felt or because of what she had just done, he did not know.  _

_ It didn’t matter. _

_ He slumped to the ground, the emptiness inside his heart excruciating. His mother was gone. Rey had killed him. _

_ It didn’t matter. _

_ He wanted to close his eyes but didn’t dare. If this was it, he wanted the last thing he saw to be Rey. Through the agony lancing through him, he watched her. Confusion replaced heartache as she knelt in front of him and reached out. _

_ Warmth. Peace. Healing. _

_ “I did want to take your hand.” _

_ Love. _

_ “Ben’s hand.” _

*****

“I...what was that? I don’t…Ben?”

Pain. Sorrow.

“Okay, okay. If...if that was real...I just...I can...I can do this…”

Warmth. Soft but growing.

“Hang on, Ben. Please.”

Peace.

“Please, please, please…”

Love.

“Over here! He needs a healer!”

Movement. Fear. Joy. Distress.

_ ‘Sorry. I’m so sorry.’ _

Quiet. Still.

_ “Goodbye.” _

Empty.

*****

The smells of bacta and that strange, sterile feeling woke Ben. He listened for a moment to the beeps of the machines monitoring his vitals and the shuffles of feet before opening his eyes. The pale grey walls of the healing rooms on Ahch-To greeted him like an old friend. Ben groaned. Though he wasn’t in any pain, he knew whatever had happened had been bad if someone had managed to manhandle him into seeing a healer.

He struggled to remember. What had he been doing? Had he been in a fight in his fighter? Or, perhaps, in a ground battle?

Flashes of snow. A red saber and a blue one locking in opposition. A scream. Pain.

_ Rey _ .

Ben jolted up. Where was Rey? What had happened to Liita Ren?

“So, you’re awake, then.”

Ben turned his head. His grandfather, as calm and at peace as ever, sat in a chair near his bed. Ben swallowed, trying to wet his dry mouth enough to speak.

Anakin did not give him a chance to.

“Someone healed you,” his grandfather said, eyes keen as he watched Ben for a reaction, “someone strong but untrained.”

Anakin stood and walked over to Ben. One wrinkled but still strong hand landed on his own, giving a comforting squeeze.

“They didn’t heal you completely but it was enough. It gave us time to get you here.”

Ben closed his eyes. The flashes of his dreams came and went in a spiral of confusion.

“Or, perhaps, they weren’t dreams…” Ben muttered.

Anakin arched an eyebrow at him but said nothing. If he knew anything, it was that Ben was best left to shift through his thoughts before asking him to explain himself.

Ben looked back at Anakin.

“Where is she?” He asked. “Is she alright?”

The way Anakin cocked his head at Ben’s question made bile rise in the younger man’s throat.

“She isn’t here.” He whispered.

“There were two men,” Anakin replied, “they had just gotten you on the  _ Falcon  _ when your parents arrived. Your father took over and flew you all here, to get you medical aid. There was no female being with them or you. The two men did mention that you had a female companion at one point but they said that as soon as they arrived to help her with you, she fled. They don’t know where she went.”

Ben knew Anakin was keeping something from him. He knew that look in his grandfather’s eye. He was waiting for Ben to reveal something to him.

“They didn’t tell you her name?” Ben asked, pointedly.

Anakin sucked in a deep breath. His hand trembled against Ben’s and Ben was suddenly struck with a memory.

“You once called her one of the greatest people you had ever known.” Ben said, slowly, the memories of his grandmother’s distress coming back to him. “But...how? No, sorry, Rey isn’t that uncommon a name. My Rey is much too young...but…” Ben’s head shot up. He narrowed his eyes at Anakin. “But  _ your  _ Rey disappeared when she was only a small child. So how could you have known her when you didn’t even know who her family was until after she was gone?”

It seemed as though Anakin aged forty years, right in front of his eyes.

“Please, grandfather,” Ben pleaded, “You keep things from me. You all do. You’ve acted strangely about so many things for...for my entire life. It’s always as though you expect something, as though you are waiting for something!”

Anakin sighed. The slump of his shoulders told Ben exactly how much whatever they were keeping from him weighed on his grandfather.

“Would that I could tell you, my boy,” Anakin said softly, “but I fear this is something you will have to discern for yourself. I fear that if I, or anyone, should tell you before you remember…”

Anakin looked away. His eyes trained on the gently moving leaves on the trees outside of Ben’s med-bay window. He sighed.

“Remember what?” Ben asked. He winced at his hard tone but he was getting tired of being left in the dark.

Especially if Rey was at all involved.

“Is Rey in danger?” He asked.

Anakin’s eyes grew dark with moisture. His slight nod felt like a saber to the heart.

Ben did not think about why he was familiar with the feeling.

No, those weren’t dreams. Not at all.

“Then I need to find her,” Ben replied, tone brooking no argument.

He pushed past his grandfather and stood from the bed, pulling the monitoring plates from him as he moved. Grabbing his trousers, Ben began to dress, hurriedly pulling his clothes on and creating a mental checklist of what he needed to get before he left.

“I agree.”

Ben nearly fell over at hearing his grandfather’s response. He whirled around and stared, slack-jawed, at the older man.

“You...you do?” Ben asked, sure he had misheard.

Anakin gave him a shaky smile.

“I do,” he nodded. He gestured for Ben to follow him out of the healing rooms. “I think you should take the  _ Falcon _ . It is the fastest ship in the galaxy after all.” Ben snorted at the mocking tone Anakin used when talking about his son-in-law’s ship. “And I think you should go alone.”

That brought Ben up short. While Anakin agreeing with his plan to go after Rey was one thing, him not ordering Ben to at least take another person, if not a small crew, with him was shocking.

“Why?” Suspicion clouded his voice.

Anakin shot him an incredulous look.

“Because Rey needs  _ you _ ,” he replied, as though Ben should have realized that himself. “And  _ you  _ need  _ her _ . Anyone else would just get in the way.”

Ben blinked.

“You do understand that you are only adding to my questions, right?” He pointed a finger at his grandfather in irritation.

Anakin rolled his eyes and gently knocked Ben’s hand away.

“So like your father, sometimes,” he muttered. Louder, he said, “Gather what you need. And take this.”

Ben startled upon registering that his grandfather had led him to his personal library. The box he held out to Ben was small but Ben didn’t need to open it to know what was inside.

“Kyber crystals?”

Anakin nodded and placed the box in Ben’s hands.

“You’ll know, when the time comes,” he said, “you both will.”

*****

His grandfather’s parting words range through Ben’s head as he packed, loaded supplies onto the  _ Falcon  _ and said his goodbyes to his parents. His grandmother was with the Jedi Council and several members of the Resistance’s leadership, working through the data that they had managed to pull from Starkiller before it’s destruction. How they managed to break into the mainframe and obtain that information in so short a time, Ben did not ask.

He never asked. No matter how odd the foreknowledge his family seemed to have concerning the Empire or the First Order, Ben never asked. He had learned as a child it would do him no good.

It should have made him angry, being kept out of the loop as he was. Indeed, whispers of malcontent still plagued him to this day.

_ “They don’t trust you.” _ The voices whispered to him, slithering echoes inside his head,  _ “You aren’t worthy in their eyes.” _

It was hard to take those voices seriously, however, when the love his family had for him was so obvious, so pronounced. His parents and grandparents and uncle and various honorary aunts and uncles never made him feel like a failure, like he was unwanted. They always encouraged him, helped him when he asked (and even when he didn’t, especially when he didn’t) and they were steadfast in their support of him.

That was how he knew to ignore the voices, whatever they were. That was how he knew those voices were lying.

Ben shook his head. Setting the last crate of rations in the galley, he pulled out his comm and checked the signal to make sure it was at full power. Finally ready, he left the galley and loped down the loading ramp to say goodbye to the small group that had helped him.

Poe Dameron wasn’t a friend, exactly; more of an irritant that Ben couldn’t bring himself to dislike completely. FN-2187, now called Finn apparently, stood next to the pilot with a huge grin on his face. He was eyeing Ben with what Han called the “fanboy sparkle”. 

“It comes with the territory, kid,” Han had said when Ben confessed he found Finn’s behavior toward him a little weird. “You do good things, people grasp on to that, especially if they’ve had to live with bad for so long.”

Ben shook the two men’s hands, nodding and gracing Finn with a smile when the man slapped him on the back and told him to come back in one piece. Then, he turned to Rose.

Rose Tico was an odd quadduck as far as members of the Resistance went. While her older sister Page seemed to be made for war, Rose was very different. Whereas Page, and so many others who had joined the Resistance, wanted blood for the blood that was taken from them, Rose didn’t want anyone to die at all. She was steadfast in her belief that love would be what saved them, that protecting love would be what helped them win. She was not a violent person by nature but whoa betied the idiot that believed that meant she couldn’t hold her own in a fight.

Rose may have been a pacifist in ideology but, in practice, she was one terrifying fighter. Ben himself had gotten his ass handed to him by her the very day she and Page had arrived and joined in training. Ben, seeing this tiny woman in front of him, had tried to go easy on her, especially as it was her first day and she admitted she had no training in combat. She had him flat on his back in less than a minute thanks to his arrogance. The smirk that settled over her mouth as she stood above him made him adore her instantly. Since then, she had become his best friend.

“Hey there, little flower,” Ben greeted, strolling up to his friend who appeared to be dressing down someone in a comically fluffy fur hat. It was Hux.

“And if you seriously think I am going to let a brilliant mind like yours just walk away, I will...I will...well, you won’t like what I do, I can promise you that!” Rose snapped, jabbing her finger against Hux’s abdomen.

Hux, much to Ben’s amusement, looked astounded. A slight flush was working it’s way across his pale cheeks and Ben was pretty sure Rose’s authoritative lecturing might actually be turning the other man on a little bit, if the way Hux’s eyes darkened was anything to go by. Ben frowned. Rose could damned well take care of herself and she certainly didn’t need Ben (or anyone else for that matter) playing shining knight but he couldn’t help the instinct that rose in him to protect his dearest friend from the attentions of anyone, Hux or otherwise.

“Agh!” Hux’s hilariously shrill scream made Ben refocus on the two of them. 

The red head was clutching his right hand to his chest, looking at Rose with a mixture of horror, fear and, yeah...that was definitely arousal. Ben shoved the thought away, not wanting to dwell on his best friend’s love (or sex) life.

“You...you bit me!” Hux said, voice trembling.

“You’re damn right I did,” Rose stated, placing her hands on her hips in defiance, “You wag your finger in my face again, I just might bite it off!”

Ben snorted out a laugh and the two turned to him.

“Solo, if these wild cretons are the types of people your Resistance is allowing in, it’s a wonder you guys are winning at all!” Hux cried.

“Creton!” Rose shouted. “Why you…”

“Okay,” Ben reached over and pulled Rose back just as she stepped toward Hux, fists raised. He considered that Rose might be less of a peace-nic than he always told himself she was. “That’s enough. Rose,” he turned her until she finally looked away from Hux, “I’m leaving.”

“Going after your girl, huh?” Rose’s mouth split into a wicked grin and Ben flushed.

“Ah, good. I, too, am concerned for Rey,” Hux said from behind Rose. “She did not look well when last I saw her.”

Ben looked up at that.

“Tell me, please,” He pleaded, “What happened?”

Hux came closer. The concern on his face was honest and Ben warmed to him slightly.

“Neither FN...ah, Finn, nor I felt comfortable simply leaving the two of you behind, regardless of either of your orders,” he began, “We set off the charger and, once the initial explosion ended, we backtracked to where we had last seen you. Once we got there, however, you were both gone and the entirety of the troops that had attempted to stop us had been defeated.”

Ben tried to be patient but, silently, he willed Hux to hurry up and get to the part about Rey.

“We heard shouting from the forest,” Hux continued, “and headed in that direction. We saw you lying against a tree and Rey fighting Liita Ren with your,” he twirled a hand in the air, “laser sword. You were obviously falling in and out of consciousness and Rey, well, it was clear who had the upper hand in that fight, so Finn and I decided to see if we could assist you first. By the time we got to your position however, Rey had defeated Ren and was sitting on the ground by your side, holding her hand above your wound.”

Ben held his breath. He could tell Rose was as well.

“It was,” Hux had a far-off look in his eyes, as though he was still trying to make sense of what he had seen, “your wound was closing, all on its own. Or, perhaps it was her. Well. When we reached you both, Rey was crying, shaking. She begged us to take you on the ship and get you as far away from Starkiller as possible. She,” Hux stopped again, his voice going raw, “she was so pale. She looked frightened. Not of us. Or even of Ren. Solo,” Hux looked at him, eyes serious, “I think she was afraid of herself. The way she was acting, it was…”

Hus shook his head, as though to clear it.

“Finn and I lifted you and began to carry you back to the ship. When we reached it, Finn turned to ask Rey to help us get you on board but…” Hux looked both apologetic and angry “We never considered that she wouldn’t be right behind us. But she wasn’t. She was gone. Of course, we wanted to go after her but then the ground began to break up and your parents arrived.” He looked down, shame falling over him. “We failed her. We did not go back to find her. If she fell or was injured on the way back to the ship...but how did we not realize?”

Ben sighed.

“You didn’t fail her, Hux,” he said, “Rey never followed you. Of that, I am sure.”

“Is...is she…” Hux couldn’t get the words out, try as he might.

“No, she isn’t dead,” Ben promised, “I am even more sure of  _ that _ .”

Hux seemed to deflate at that and the overwhelming strength of his relief at the news hit Ben in the chest. Hux had been very worried about Rey and he had blamed himself for what he thought had happened to her.

“Wow,” Rose whispered, “you helped save him?”

She was looking at Hux with awe, her deep brown eyes wide and shining with gratitude. Hux turned red at the attention.

“Well,” he coughed into his fist, then stood tall and proud,” of course I did.”

Rose grinned wide.

“That settles it, Armie,” she pronounced, “you’re mine now. Let’s see just how useful you can be on rellium drives, yeah?”

Rose threw herself into a hug with Ben, nearly knocking him off his feet, kissed his cheek, and told him to come back successful.

“May the Force be with you, Pipsqueek,” she said.

Ben laughed. “May the Force be with you, Gigantor,” he replied. To Hux, he said, “Take care of my favorite mechanic, Armitage, or I’ll sell tickets so everyone can watch her kick your ass.”

Hux squawked in indignation but put up almost no fight as Rose dragged him off.

Ben watched the two of them immediately begin to argue again and was struck with the thought that they reminded him of his parents. He cringed and turned back to the  _ Falcon _ .

It was time to find Rey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rose and Ben are best friends and no one is gonna tell me any different. It's cannon.


	6. Running to Nowhere

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am a little later than usual getting this posted. It has been...busy. I hope it was worth the wait!

Blood.

Ben’s blood.

Rey’s hands shook as she stared at them. Though she had washed and scrubbed and rubbed her hands raw, all she could see was Ben’s blood on her hands.

Her fault.

He nearly died because of her.

He had tried to save her because she was stupid and reckless and...and…

“Ahh!” Rey screamed into her hands, head bowed over her lap, and the tears she had thought done began to fall again.

The fight. Ben. Liita Ren. The Force. It all coiled through her head like a thousand snakes writhing en mass in a pit of darkness.

*****

The dreams weren’t uncommon. She’d had them - dreams, visions, sudden inexplicable memories - all her life.

This though. This was new.

The vision of someone - who? a Jedi? - healing someone...and then just...knowing...knowing what to do, knowing how to save him.

That was new.

Rey shifted in the seat of her stolen TIE, attempting to dispel the discomfort in her back from the strained muscle she had obtained when swinging Ben’s...weapon at Liita Ren. Though it wasn’t exactly heavy, Rey had more experience with her staff and the shortened blade had left her having to overcorrect her first few strikes.

Kriff. She had fought Liita Ren.

_ And won _ .

Rey didn’t know if Ren was dead. She didn’t think so but she had been too focused on Ben’s injuries to pay any attention to the half-Cathar once he had fallen. Rey hoped he wasn’t dead, in spite of who he was and the things he had done. She didn’t think she could bear to have that on her conscience.

Not again.

The crackle of the ship’s comm brought Rey back to the present. The proximity alert flared to life just as a gravelly voice hailed her.

“State your identification,” it said, the voice grave.

Rey brought up the radar and saw a massive ship less than a parsec from her location. After setting the scanner to identify the vessel, Rey realized that she had somehow come upon a dreadnought without even realizing it. She cursed herself for getting lost in her thoughts.

“State your identification,” the stern, female voice said again, “or we shall consider you an enemy combatant and obliterate your ship.”

Rey scrambled for a moment, then rolled her eyes at herself.

“Might as well give it a shot,” she muttered lowly, then, speaking in almost a growl in an attempt to lower her voice, said, “Identification, FN-2187.”

She held her breath, waiting, but wasn’t idle. She reached over to set the navigation and held one hand near the small black tracking box and the other hand hovered, shakily, over the throttle. There was no lightspeed capability on the small fighter so she had to hope that whatever the top speed the little ship was capable of would be enough.

“Identification verified,” the woman on the other end of the comm responded, “you are not authorized to pilot a TIE craft, FN-2187. Return to the  _ Supremacy _ and submit yourself for evaluation.”

“No, I don’t think so,” Rey replied in her normal voice, grinning madly. She ignited Ben’s saber, that she had forgotten to give back after the fight, and destroyed the tracking box and then hit the throttle on the TIE. The ship shot off and, within a few parsecs, she was out of range of the dreadnought and the shouting of the First Order officer cut out.

Not taking any chances, Rey swung around and down, heading toward a mass of asteroids in the hopes of hiding out. While the ship had plenty of fuel, there was no guarantee she would be able to get somewhere relatively safe before the First Order caught up to her.

She almost cursed herself for not going with Ben and the others but the memory of Ben’s blood on her hands, his saber in her grip and the...the Force flowing through her…

No. She had made the right choice. She couldn’t, wouldn’t, put Ben in any more danger with her presence.

“Kriff!” Rey shouted.

Three TIEs shot up out of nowhere and began firing on her, just as she entered the asteroid field. Rey pushed left, then up before spiraling down and around one of the TIEs. She shot at it as she passed, sighing in relief as the craft exploded. One down, two to go. Internally, Rey praised the way the TIE handled as the ship swam through the asteroid field while dodging fire from the still pursuing First Order pilots. Externally, she held fast to the throttle, a headache forming and pulsing at the back of her skull. 

Another TIE came up on her flank and Rey banked right in a barrel-roll to avoid clipping the wing of the other ship. She flipped the ship upside-down and fired, hitting the TIE and cutting her pursuers down to one.

One that she had failed to keep in her periphery while dealing with his comrades.

Rey cried out. Her body shot forward and her head slammed against the bulkhead. Dizzy, hurting and nauseated, she shakily turned to avoid another hit and began shooting wildly at the final TIE. From the corner of her eye, she watched as an asteroid, barely a few kilometers wide, careened toward her quickly failing ship. With one last shot at the TIE, and missing, Rey let her ship drop back and slowed until she could safely land on the asteroid. Unfortunately, the pilot of the last TIE was right behind her and, vision wavering, Rey watched as the black ship rose up over the miniscule horizon of the asteroid and took aim.

Her last thought before blacking out was that she wished she had remembered to give Ben his saber back.

*****

_ “Little Light? Where are you Little Light?” _

_ Rey clapped a small hand over her mouth in an attempt to stifle her giggles. She peaked around the trunk of the shuura tree she was hiding behind and saw her mother on the other end of the garden, crouching low and poking at a cluster of bhansgrek shrubs. _

_ “Come out, Little Light,” her mother called. _

_ Rey grinned. Her mother was never able to find her when they played Hider and Seeker. _

_ Rey crept around the tree on all fours and scuttled a few feet before rolling under the tullepa bushes and dropping to her stomach. She used her elbows to pull herself through the rows of bright orange and yellow flowers, keeping low, and then shot to her feet and ran the last few yards to grab the white flag from the mouth of the anooba statue crowning the fountain in the middle of the garden. _

_ “I win!” She crowed, laughing when her mother turned to her, mouth open in surprise. _

_ ***** _

_ “Ben, please, don’t go this way.” _

_ ***** _

_ “The Jedi must end.” _

_ It was said with such conviction, such finality, that Rey felt lost. Luke Skywalker, the legend, the man who defeated the Emperor, was adamant that the Jedi needed to end. _

_ Why? _

_ ***** _

_ The sun scorched her neck. She knelt down just outside her At-At and pulled off her boots, shaking the sand from them. Rey stretched her feet, flexed her toes, and rubbed at yet another new callus on her heel. _

_ What she wouldn’t give to be somewhere green. Somewhere cool. Somewhere with no kriffing sand. _

_ ***** _

_ “Something inside of me. Something,” she paused, unsure, “that has always been there.” _

_ ‘Help me,’ she wanted to beg, ‘please.’ _

_ ***** _

_ “No, no shining one,” her father reached over and adjusted her grip on the pen in her hand, “calligraphy requires patience. You must hold the pen a certain way to ensure your strokes are consistent and fluid.” _

_ Rey scrunched her brow. Huffing out a breath of consternation, she did as her father bade her and tried again. At successfully copying the entirety of the line he had given her, Rey turned to him and beamed. _

_ ***** _

_ The hiss that preceded the removal of his helmet startled her. Seeing him for the first time startled her even more. _

_ He was beautiful. _

_ Confused, because surely evil could not be beautiful, Rey forced herself to look away. _

_ ***** _

_ “I’ll come back for you, sweetheart. I promise.” _

_ ***** _

It was warm. Warm, and comfortable in a way that spoke of familiarity rather than luxury.

Rey opened her eyes. It took no more than a second before she recognized the ceiling of the captain’s bunk on the  _ Falcon _ .

She closed her eyes again and searched her memory. The TIEs, the asteroid, the last TIE preparing to fire on her and, oh, yes, the shadow of a larger ship rising up behind the TIE just as Rey could no longer keep herself conscious.

Ben. 

In spite of herself, Rey’s heart flipped over at the knowledge that Ben had come for her, that he had saved her.

Gingerly, and mindful of the hit she had taken to her head, Rey sat up. She was more than a little surprised when she felt no pain, no dizziness and no nausea. Ben must have healed her.

Sighing in resignation, she rose from the bed and slipped on her boots before heading out to find her savior.

Walking the well-loved corridors of the Falcon, Rey reached out one hand and trailed it along the durasteel walls. If she concentrated enough, she could almost feel the laughter, tears, joy and sorrow that had come in times-past, almost as though the ship had absorbed every moment and made each one a part of its structure.

She shook herself of the idea and moved toward the cockpit. Though she loathed what it meant, she could tell Ben was there. It was as though she could feel him.

It wasn’t the first time she’d had the feeling of knowing where he was just on feeling alone and even though she knew it had to have come from the Force, she couldn’t pretend she didn’t like it. She wanted to know where Ben was. She wanted to be able to feel him, no matter what.

When she entered the cockpit, Ben was turned away, studying a starmap. Deciding not to interrupt him, Rey quietly moved to take the co-pilot’s seat and sat down. A few more minutes of quiet had her looking over at him. His eyes were closed and there was a distinctly serene expression on his face. Rey realized he wasn’t looking at the starmap at all. He almost looked like he was asleep.

He was meditating. Rey wasn’t sure how she knew that but there was no doubt in her mind that, that was what he was doing. She decided to leave him be and turned instead to the starmap he had brought up on the navigation panel. A cluster of planets dominated the screen; Scipio, Ithor, Ord Mantell, Balnab, Shili and Coruscant.

Rey was familiar, of course, with Coruscant but the rest of the planets on the map were new to her. She selected one, Ord Mantell, and read through the description of the planet’s climate, people and history. Dismissing it, she selected Scipio next, then Balnab. She made her way through all of the planets in the cluster before Ben began to stir. She was reading over the spiritual beliefs of the peoples on Ithor when she felt Ben’s awareness sharpen. She shivered at the shift in the Force.

When Ben opened his eyes, Rey couldn’t help but find herself caught in the warmth there. It reminded her, just a little, of the way her father looked at her mother. She shoved the thought away.

Ben nodded at the holo she had been reading.

“I think we go there,” he said without preamble, “to Ithor. They aren’t fond of outsiders and to go to the planet’s surface is forbidden but, considering what my grandfather did for them, we might be granted some privileges others might not.”

Rey nodded slowly. She had read about Anakin Skywalker and his Order defending the planet from destruction by the Empire and about the Ithorians, who considered the surface of the planet to be sacred and had built their cities so they floated above the land so as not to desecrate it.

“Rey.”

Rey looked back at Ben. The concern in his face, the questions in his eyes, made her cringe. She wrapped her arms around herself and looked away. She knew what he wanted to talk about and it was not a conversation she wanted to have.

Ben left his seat and knelt before her. He placed his hands on the seat next to her thighs and ducked down so he could look her in the eyes.

“You’re strong in the Force,” he said. Rey shrank in on herself. “Rey, look at me.”

The gentleness of Ben’s tone compelled her to open her eyes. His gaze was soft as he looked at her.

“I’m afraid,” she whispered.

Ben’s mouth shrank into a frown and his brows drew together, creating a small crease between them.

“Afraid? Of what?” He asked. “Hey.” He placed a hand on her arm when she clenched her eyes shut again. “Rey, what are you afraid of?”

Rey struggled with herself. Did she tell Ben the truth? Could she trust him with it? Or would he think her a monster for what she had done?

“When,” she started slowly, softly, “when I was eleven, I was climbing through one of the larger ships out in the Rolling Dunes.”

She stopped, throat closing in. Ben just waited for her, eyes kind and countenance patient.

“I was trying to move from one end of a fallen beam to the other, to where the main control panels had been located on the aft deck. Another beam, nearby, suddenly broke away from the side of the ship and began to fall directly toward me. I...I was so scared. All I remember is that I cried out, screamed, and threw up my hands as though to block the beam’s impact.”

Ben moved his hand from her arm to her knee, squeezing gently. Rey took a deep breath.

“The next thing I knew, the entire beam, as massive as it was,” she looked up at him, eyes wild, “it was enormous! It should have weight tons! But suddenly it was flying through the rest of the wreckage of the ship and slamming into a deck three below mine!”

Perhaps her distress was apparent to him because, still, he waited.

“Two other scavengers were on that deck, Ben,” tears began to streak down her cheeks in earnest, “they died. Because of me.”

Ben drew in a breath and Rey waited. She waited for him to push away from her in disgust, to leave and never look back.

“Oh, sweetheart,” he breathed and Rey squawked when he drew himself up and pulled her to his chest. “It isn’t your fault. Yes, they died, but you didn’t mean to hurt anyone. You were scared and what happened isn’t your fault. You were a child, Rey.”

Ben pulled back. He brushed a lock of hair that had fallen from her braid back and behind her ear.

“You were a child.” He reiterated. “You had no control and you were scared. What happened is not your fault.”

In that moment, eight years of pain, self-loathing and fear melted away. While it wasn’t truly gone, Rey felt free, light, in a way she hadn’t in nearly a decade.

Ben stood and retook his seat. He brought up a map of the terrain of Ithor and pointed to an area of dense forest.

“I think we need to train,” he said, “I can help you learn to control your power, help you learn to harness it. I think that Ithor is a good place to do this. The reason the Ithorians hold the planet’s surface to be so sacred is that it is a dense, natural epicenter of the Force. It is a place that even those that aren’t Force sensitive are able to feel the Force around them. Being in that environment will only aid you in learning to understand your connection to the Force.”

Rey nodded absentmindedly. Learning to control this power that she had, instead of trying to deny it as she had for so long, it was a heady thought.

“So,” she said, slowly, trying to parse through her thoughts, “you...want to be my teacher?”

Something flashed in Ben’s eyes at that. They darkened with what Rey might have called arousal had that made any sense at all. Ben swallowed and gave a slight nod.

“Yes,” he whispered lowly, “your teacher.”

Rey felt a surge of heat hit her at his tone and a sense of deja vu rolled over her, making her shiver.

“Okay,” she said, just as softly, “teach me.”

*****

Rey had to leave the cockpit after that conversation. While she appreciated Ben’s outlook on what had happened that day in the Rolling Dunes, she still couldn’t shake the guilt that she had carried with her for so long. It was better, no doubt, but Rey knew that it wouldn’t likely go away for a good long while, if ever. It was something that she needed to work through and she knew Ben would help her do it but she needed to get away from him before she did something reckless.

But, oh. Ben.

That look in his eyes, the way he touched her, his gentle yet intense behavior toward her. It was overwhelming in the best of ways but she wasn’t used to that kind of attention and it left her reeling.

Ben, for his part, had waved her off to “rest and take time to just be” and commented that he needed to contact his grandfather before trying to reach out to Ithor. Rey wasn’t sure about Ben’s plan. From what she had read, the Ithor were steadfast in their ways and only a very few, select people were ever allowed down to the surface of the planet and those that went were never allowed to leave once on the ground. And they never allowed non Ithorians to go to the surface. For Ben to think to ask for them to be allowed on the planet at all, let alone on the surface and only temporarily at that…

His grandfather must have done a hell of a lot for the Ithorians for the idea to have even crossed Ben’s mind.

Rey entered the captain’s quarters and headed for the refresher. A quick shower and a nap sounded heavenly.

She stripped off her clothes and tossed them aside, not caring where they landed. She pulled the tie from her hair and slid her fingers through her braid to loosen it as she stepped into the shower. The lock of hair that Ben had tucked behind her ear did not move and she had to shake it free, shivering in spite of the warm water now rushing over her.

The memory of his gloved fingers brushing over her ear and neck as he had done so stayed with her, even as she wet her hair and set to washing it. The heat that had culminated in his eyes, in his voice, skated across her skin. A pulse began to grow in between her legs, increasing in strength with every passing minute, with every brush of her hands over her breasts, stomach and thighs as she washed herself.

_ “What would it feel like,” _ she wondered,  _ “if it were his hands?” _

Rey closed her eyes. She cupped her left breast and tried to imagine it was Ben touching her. Frustrated that it didn’t feel right, she moved her other hand down between her legs. Scrunching her eyes even tighter in an effort to make her fantasy feel more real, she began to outline the shape of herself, slicking one finger gently around her folds before dipping in.

Suddenly, she could feel it. She could see it. A vision or a memory, she wasn’t sure. Ben’s hands on her, his fingers sliding through her. She could feel his mouth on hers, as though it was really happening. Rey gasped and sank to her knees, legs open, effectively putting herself on display for the man that wasn’t really there. She cried out as the Ben she could see in her mind, so clearly, laid her out and moved down to face her cunt. His mouth, the mouth she had been thinking about since they first met, made contact with her pussy lips and Rey couldn’t hold back the strangled scream that escaped her throat. Wetness gushed from her, coating her hand. She arched her back as her vision of Ben began sucking ravenously on her clit and slid two fingers inside her. Her hips jerked once, twice. A shudder of heat rolled down her spine.

The Ben inside her mind worked her over, pistoning his fingers into her rapidly while sliding his tongue over her clit at an almost glacial pace. A sudden crook of his fingers, combined with a harsh suck on her clit had her coming, screaming his name.

Rey slumped back against the wall of the refresher, panting.

She only hoped, as she came back to herself, that Ben hadn’t heard her.


	7. The Jedi, The Sith and The Order of the Force

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry it has taken so long to update. I've been really struggling with my depression lately and it's left me unable and unwilling to do anything more than get out of bed and even that has been hard. Writing when things get like this is...almost impossible, to be honest. I hope that this chapter makes up for the wait.
> 
> Thank you so much to everyone reading, commenting and leaving kudos. I cannot tell you how much that means to me. It makes me want to work extra hard on this to ensure you continue to love it. Thank you so much, guys.

Ben struggled not to blush as he passed Rey on his way back to the  _ Falcon  _ to grab another crate of supplies. 

After Rey had left the cockpit, Ben had immediately hailed his grandfather to let him know he had found Rey and had her safely onboard and to let him know of his plan. Though it took a little convincing, Anakin had relented and together, they had hailed the High Council of Ithor. Ben had felt Rey’s dubiousness over his idea but the Council had proven immediately receptive to it, much to Ben’s surprise. Once the Hol-fer, the highest of the Council, had explained that they had had a vision of Ben and Rey coming to the planet and “uniting the fabric of the galaxy”, Ben had understood their enthusiastic consent.

Sort of.

While it was easy to understand the Council taking a vision from the Hol-fer seriously, he did not understand what the Hol-fer had meant by “uniting the fabric of the galaxy”. 

Ben bent down and picked up the box containing the pump for the hydro-generator. Although Ithor was flush with deep oceans, rolling rivers and tumbling waterfalls, the Ithorians had warned them to be careful and only drink from the rockbed streams as the other water on the planet was salt-laden and unpalatable to most carbon-based species. Thus, the hydro-generator was needed to ensure they would have enough water while planet-side.

Ben huffed his way down the loading ramp, face flushed from the effort of hoisting the heavy crate. It reddened even more when he caught sight of Rey crouched over the instruction pamphlet for the electric tents the Ithorians had loaned them. She had her nose scrunched and a curl of her hair had escaped the hasty bun it had been thrown in and was currently lying provocatively against the side of her neck.

Ben swallowed, his nerves flaring again.

It had been during his and his grandfather’s wait for the Ithorian Council to answer their hale when Ben first felt it. A spike of warmth, low, between his legs. Yearning desperation, then, fierce, uncontrollable pleasure. It had taken every ounce of his control not to cry out or come in his pants. He knew that his grandfather had realized something wasn’t quite right, no doubt from how red Ben had turned in his embarrassment but, thankfully, Anakin didn’t say anything about it.

Ben knew the feelings had not been his own. He knew they had been Reys and it made him  _ want _ .

In spite of the conversation happening on the holo in front of him, in spite of the blood rushing in his ears at the moment she had....began to touch herself...kriff! In spite of that, Ben could have sworn he heard Rey cry out his name. The thought sent another rush of heat through him.

Rey looked up then and flashed him a shy grin before turning back to setting up the tents. Ben gulped. He had been the object of attention for many women, and several men as well, over the years - glamorous, striking, elegant and everything in between - no one had ever made him feel the way that she had. Indeed, there was something about Rey that called to him in the basest and most carnel of ways. He wasn’t used to such feelings and it made him even more embarrassed to think about what he wanted to do to her, what he wanted her to do to him. He had no real experience in such matters, beyond a few stolen fumbles as a teen.

Ben shook himself and pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind. They were here for him to teach Rey about the Force and her place in it and not for anything else, no matter how desperately he may want it.

*****

Ithor’s day/night cycles were shorter than those on Corellia or Chandrila but just slightly longer than on Ahch-To. Even so, by the time dusk settled over their small camp, Ben was exhausted. The events of the past few days caught up with him, and apparently Rey as well, and when he suggested calling it an early night after they finished eating the Bogdil chili he had whipped up, Rey readily agreed.

After ensuring Rey was settled in her tent, and not staring at her ass as she crawled into it thank-you-very-much, Ben tumbled into his own tent and fell directly on his camping bag. He was asleep within seconds.

*****

When the sun rose on the fifth day, Ben nearly ignored it and went back to sleep. The previous four days had been hell and he was not looking forward to another day of Rey questioning everything he said or did, fighting with him over his methods, glaring at him when he tried to correct her or enduring her sarcastic mocking when she had had enough of training and just wanted to irritate him.

Also, the sexual tension.  _ That  _ he  _ really  _ didn’t want to have to face again.

Ben honestly didn’t know what her problem was. He was going through the same lessons with her that his grandfather and uncle had with him. Connecting to the Force through meditation. Learning to recognize and evaluate one’s emotions. Learning to channel those emotions appropriately. Understanding how the Force worked through those sensitive enough to wield it and understanding how to work with the Force to achieve what you wanted.

Really, they were the most basic lessons that Ben could think of to start Rey’s training with but the whole time she had been a varied mixture of bored, irritated, frustrated, confused and angry.

She was the worst student.

_ “A student can only learn if the teacher listens to the student.” _

Ben sighed at the memory of his grandmother chastising his uncle came to mind. Though she was not Force sensitive, Grandma Padmé taught at Grandfather Anakin’s Order. Indeed, she held several seminars a year teaching techniques for diplomacy, negotiation, hostage and crisis management and even combat. Anakin believed non-Force-centric tactics were important for every Force-user to learn as one never knew what kind of foe, potential-ally or situation they may find themselves in where non-Force techniques could prove even more useful.

Ben had drawn from his grandmother’s lessons more than he had believed he would when he had taken her classes.

He rubbed his eyes, huffing out a self-deprecating laugh. Of course. He had been trying to teach Rey using the methods that he had responded to the best. He hadn’t given a thought to how  _ she  _ learned and responded.

Right. Today, he was going to change things up. Today, he was going to ask Rey what she wanted.

With that, admittedly flimsy, plan in place, Ben brushed his teeth, pulled his hair back into a bun and shimmied into a fresh set of sweatpants and a t-shirt. He stepped out of his tent only to find Rey already up and practicing what they had worked on the day before.

Ben was entranced. The early morning light caught on Rey’s exposed arms and face, warming the already tanned skin to a soft bronze. Her movements were slow and controlled as she shifted from the First Form directly into the Third and then into the Second. He could see the subtle rise and fall of her chest as she took deep, steady breaths that coincided with the movements of her body.

She was breathtaking and it took Ben a moment to reign in his self-control, trying not to dwell on how soft yet strong that same body had felt as he had guided her through those very same movements the day before. A little touch on her arm to adjust the angle. A small tap to her shoulder when he wanted her to turn. The press of her lithe back against his chest as he whispered into her ear that she was far too tense and needed to relax her muscles.

The way her breath had caught as he leaned close.

Ben shook himself. No. He was not going to dwell on those thoughts at all.

Rey turned in that moment and their eyes caught. Ben exhaled shakily and walked toward her. She dropped the arm holding the branch he had given her to use as a stand-in for a lightsaber. She was watching him, wariness in her eyes, and that was when Ben realized he had been basically stalking toward her while holding her in an intense gaze. Internally, he winced. Externally, he relaxed his shoulders and offered her a crooked grin. It seemed to do the trick because her rigid form melted away and she gave him a small smile back.

“Good morning, teacher,” she said, smirking.

Ben rolled his eyes.

“Good morning, student,” he mocked and Rey laughed lightly. Ben continued, “Have you eaten yet?”

Rey shook her head and gestured toward the campfire where a small caf-kettle was set atop the flames and another cooking kettle sat to the side, steam curling up from the porridge within. Ben lumbered over and scooped up two bowls of the porridge before pouring a healthy mug-full of caf for each of them. They ate in silence. Ben contemplated how he wanted to go about changing their lessons as he watched Rey eat. It was something else. She ate like she was starving but trying her best not to look like she was starving. Ben wondered what her life had been like before he met her but knew that asking wouldn’t lead to answers.

Rey had a tendency to shut down when her past was questioned and Ben respected her reluctance to discuss it.

When the last spoonful of porridge was eaten and the last dregs of caf swallowed with a heady sigh, Ben stood and placed his dishes to the side to be dealt with later. Rey looked at him in curiosity.

“I thought we might try something different today,” Ben started, still unsure of what, exactly, he wanted to do. “You’re doing well so far but you seem to be…” he trailed off when Rey focussed her eyes on him. It reminded him of the time on the Falcon when she was reading up on the various planets in the system they were now in, like she was fascinated, enthralled, by what she was seeing. A thought struck him and he decided to ride it. “You seem bored. I think,” he laughed and shook his head at himself at his own stupidity, “I think you may be more like me than I realized.”

Rey blinked at him, a small smile curling around her mouth.

“Oh?” She asked, eyebrow raised, “how so?”

Ben sucked his mouth for a moment, remembering the young teen who preferred to spend hours studying over the physical training that his grandfather thrust upon him. Though he also enjoyed the physical training now, he was still an academic at heart and rey might be similar in that regard. At least a little.

“Come on,” he said, making his decision, “we’re going for a hike.”

Rey tilted her head at him, eyes narrowed in suspicion, but eventually stood and grabbed her pack and water flask and followed him into the forest.

*****

Two hours later the sun was high in the sky and Ben decided to stop. It helped that they had come across a small waterfall rumbling happily into the crystalline river that they had followed from their camp. Ben set his pack down and sat in on the moss laden ground. Rey followed suit and sat to face him.

“What do you know of the history of the Force?” Ben asked her.

Rey blinked at him. “Uh...what?”

Ben huffed out a laugh.

“The history of the Force,” he repeated, then clarified, “to be specific, the history of Force users.”

Rey shifted, looking nervous, as though Ben was going to pass or fail her based on her answer.

“Um, well,” she started, “there are the Jedi and then, um, your grandfather’s Order and, uh, the Sith?”

Ben grinned at her and she relaxed.

“A good start,” he acknowledged with a nod, “but that is pretty recent, all things considered.”

Rey started. “But the Jedi Order has existed for over a thousand years!” She cried. “How is that recent?”

Ben’s grin widened. “A thousand years is nothing compared to how long the Force has been calling upon beings to wield it.” He replied. Rey’s curiosity bloomed and she scooted forward, leaning in, her attention rapt.

_ ‘Gotcha,’ _ Ben thought.

“In the beginning,” he said, “there was the Force and those sensitive enough to it to be able to call upon it. There were no Jedi or Sith or even my grandfather’s Order of the Force, though I will explain why that isn’t entirely true in a moment.”

Rey just nodded, caught up in what he was saying. Ben felt a flare of satisfaction.

“In the early centuries of Force ability, Force users simply were. There was no central ideology, no creed, no rules. While some Force users did band together for one purpose or another, these groups were loose and small. But,” Ben stopped to take a sip of water, “these Force users didn’t really know what it was that they were. They didn’t know what the Force was or what gave them the powers they had and, because of that, they were rather weak. A bit like,” Ben worked his mouth again, “a bit like a child that has learned to talk. They don’t know or understand what it is they are doing and so they are unable to speak in full sentences or create complex ideas right away.”

“So,” Rey sad softly, “they were still learning, slowly, because they didn’t know what it was they were trying to learn?”

Ben nodded. “Exactly.”

Rey sat back for a moment, contemplating this information. She looked up at Ben.

“And then? Someone must have realized it was the Force, right?”

Ben smiled. She was quick, for sure, and not just with her staff or fist.

“His name was Phanius,” Ben said, “though the records are now lost to tell us how or where or even exactly when, somehow Phanius discovered the Force and what it was. Once he realized what power he wielded, he knew just how dangerous it could be in the hands of the untrained. By all accounts, it was Phanius who founded the Jedi, though,” Ben cautioned, “they were not the Jedi as we know them today.”

Rey tipped her chin in understanding and Ben went on.

“Phanius began a school to train Force sensitives. He had a friend join him, among others, to teach those that did not understand their power. As time went on, Phanius came to believe that certain aspects of the Force were too dangerous to teach and banned them from the school. His friend, Ajunta Pall, disagreed with this ban and fought with Phanius on it. Eventually, the two decided to go their separate ways, though they remained friends.”

Rey was leaning so close now, Ben could smell the sweetness of her hair. He swallowed and did his best to ignore it.

“Eventually, a Jedi Council was formed but as the Council grew stronger, the relationship between the Jedi and those like Ajunta Pall became more and more strained. In the end, the Jedi Council sought to sever all ties with Pall and his fellow so-called Dark Jedi. However, in doing so, they enraged Pall and his followers and set off what would become known as the Hundred Years Darkness.”

Rey’s eyes widened.

“Phanius was also angry. His friend vanished after the edict of the Jedi Council and Phanius was worried and furious on his friend’s behalf. Less than a year later, though, Ajunta Pall re-emerged, more powerful and darker than ever. He proclaimed the Jedi a false order and named himself the new Master of the true order of the Force. He called them the Sith.”

Ben watched as Rey’s expression flew from shock to anger to sadness.

“And what of Phanius?” She asked. “Did he ever reconcile with his friend or did he lose him forever?”

Ben sighed. “He joined him.” He said.

Rey let out a squawk of surprise. “What?”

Ben shot her a half grin. “Phanius joined him. He renounced the Jedi, the very Order he himself had started, and became a Sith Lord. Some claim it is because he saw the hypocrisy of his own Order in what they had done. Others…” he trailed off for a moment, “well, I think I tend to think it is a bit of both.”

“Huh? A bit of both what?” Rey glared at him. “You never gave a second reason people thought Phanius joined Ajunta Pall.”

Ben smirked. “Love.” He said.

Rey reared back. She blinked in confusion, then her face lit in understanding.

“Oh,” she breathed, “you think that they were in love, not just friends.”

Ben nodded. “It is highly likely. They spent the rest of their lives together, two Sith Lords standing against the Jedi. They lived together, neither ever married, and they often referred to one another as their Completion. When Phanius died, many years later, Ajunta Pall is said to have proclaimed his death as ‘the death of my soul’ and he died just a few hours after his friend.”

“Oh, that is so sad,” Rey whispered.

“Well,” Ben chuckled, “they did have over seven decades together, so it isn’t really all that sad, is it?”

Rey laughed. “I suppose. Having a lifetime with someone that you love like that…” she flushed and refused to meet Ben’s eyes.

They were both quiet for several minutes but Ben had more he wanted to tell Rey, more that he wanted her to know, to understand.

“The Jedi order that exists now is a result of that schism,” he said, catching Rey’s attention once more, “though they have relaxed their rigid ideology concerning what they call the Dark side of the Force since my grandfather broke away from them.”

Rey squinted at him. “Why did your grandfather break away from the Jedi?”

Ben started. He wouldn’t pretend it wasn’t a question he had asked both himself and his grandfather over the years but…

“I...I don’t know,” he admitted, “when I asked grandfather, once, he told me that he had an experience that made him realize that remaining with the Jedi and trying to adhere to their beliefs would only lead him to ruin and the loss of everything he held dear. He refused to explain what that experience was or even when it happened.”

“Why wouldn’t he tell you? You would think that would be important.” Rey countered.

Ben sighed. Yes, it was important. He knew it was. He also knew…

“There…” he stopped, unsure if he wanted to share this with Rey but knew in his heart that he wanted to share everything with her, “there has always been something strange about my family. Growing up, it seemed as though they were always waiting for something, expecting something...from me. What, I couldn’t say but…” he looked up at Rey, “but I think it might have something to do with you.”

Quickly, he explained everything, from his grandmother’s upset about her friend’s daughter to his family’s reaction to hearing her grandchild’s name to his grandfather’s remarks about knowing Rey. The more he talked, the paler Rey became. Finally, Ben admitted to one last thing. Something that, while new and only occurring since he had met Rey, was even more important than anything else in his mind.

“I have dreams, visions, sometimes,” he said softly, “only since I met you but...they feel like memories and yet, I wonder how that could possibly be true…”

Rey gasped in a few breaths, eyes wide. “Me too,” she whispered. “I...sometimes I see you but,” she squinted her eyes, nose wrinkling cutely at the same time, “it isn’t you or, I don’t know, it is you but another you?”

Ben was shaken. “Yes, I’ve seen another version of you as well and me, a life I know is not mine and yet, I know, without any doubt,  _ is  _ mine…”

Silence reigned once more. Ben watched Rey watch the waterfall. The cloying scent of the trees, unknown to Ben, mixed with the sweetness of the moss underneath them and the briny smell of the water from the falls. He breathed it in, hoping to find a semblance of balance. Rey turned to him.

“I think we need to focus on this more and less on my training,” she stated, resolute.

Ben contemplated this for a moment. Rey did need to train, there was no doubt about that but Ben wondered if whatever was happening to them, whatever was occurring between them, might be the key to everything: his family’s strange foreknowledge, the expectant air they always seemed to carry for him, his and Rey’s connection and there was a connection, once even deeper than they were aware of, he was sure…

“Okay,” he nodded, “let’s find out just what this,” he waved a hand between them, “is.”

Rey grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While Phanius and Ajunta Pall are cannon characters in Star Wars (all Star Wars content is cannon, no matter what Disney says, except TROS, that's crap) I took some liberties with their origins and stories.


	8. Shades of the Last Jedi & the Ghost of Kylo Ren

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All I can say is sorry for taking so long to post again and promise that I will make sure it doesn't take so long to do so again. Between personal issues and the weather emergency here last week, well...
> 
> We are okay. We lost power for 3 days and did run out of food the day before power came back (lost most of our food in the fridge b/c of no power), we did have water and I have never met a blanket or throw I didn't love (esp if on clearance) so we had enough to keep us somewhat warm. We are okay but my heart aches for all of the people that are not.
> 
> Now, on to the story. This chapter was difficult to write, for many reasons. First and foremost, I realized that I was going to have to change things up in presentation?, style? for it to work and I like it so I may be sticking with it in a few more chapters. Also, trying to convey certain experiences and emotions is difficult when trying to write***(see more below)

The trek back to their campsite was somehow slower than the hike that morning and yet, Rey felt as though time was moving much faster than it should. Ben’s revelation that he had been having visions like hers was...terrifying, to be honest. She didn’t know what to make of them but she did know that if they  _ were  _ memories, as Ben had described them, she wasn’t sure she wanted to know why the memory version of Ben was so frightening.

Well, maybe not completely frightening. Just...just the visions of him in the mask...in the woods...chasing her. Everything else though…

Rey slammed into Ben’s back, bringing her back to the here and now. She glanced up at him, opening her mouth to ask why he had stopped, when she felt it.

A presence. A feeling. A sickening, dark, awful feeling.

“What is that?” She whispered.

Ben glanced back at her. “You can feel that?” He asked softly.

“Yes,” she said, voice wavering.

A flash above them caught their attention. Rey sucked in a gulp of air as they watched three black transport shuttles break through the clouds, heading straight for them.

“Get to the ship,” Ben screamed, pushing Rey toward the  _ Falcon  _ that they could just see through a break in the trees.

Rey ran, jumping over fallen trees and skidding down a shallow hill before breaking through the brush that surrounded their camp. She fell onto her hands and knees after tripping over loose stones on the ground, skinning the sensitive skin on her palms. She scrambled to her feet, sucking in breaths and trying to stay calm. She leapt over the firepit, the embers long since cold, and glanced behind her.

Ben wasn’t following.

Rey stopped. “Ben!” She screamed, just as a figure stepped through the woods into the clearing.

Liita Ren.

_ “Get to the ship, Rey,” _ she heard Ben’s voice in her head,  _ “you’re unarmed. Get to the ship and take off.” _

How? How was he doing this? Rey looked at Ben. He flicked his eyes toward her. A question. Did she hear him? Slowly, Rey nodded.

She turned back around and ran, stumbling up the loading ramp and skidding around the corner of the main corridor, heading toward the cockpit. At the threshold, she stopped. She knew...she knew she should follow Ben’s orders, it was one of the few promises he had weaseled out of her before they landed on Ithor: when he gave an order, she needed to obey it without question. Still.

Still.

Rey growled low in her throat.

“Kriff this,” she spat and stepped back to head over to the lounge where her blaster was sitting on the bench seat.

Then, she felt it.

A sweet, cloying something that filled her ears, her mind and called to her. Rey followed it, heart racing. 

_ “Rey.” _

A soft voice whispered her name, gentle and low. 

_ “Rey.” _

It was Ben’s voice, she had no doubt, but younger. Much younger. Rey stepped into the captain’s bunk. A tug, almost like a string wrapped around her wrist, pulled her toward the bed where Ben’s knapsack sat slumped against the solid bed frame. Rey knelt. Biting her lip, she flipped the top of the bag up and unzipped the main compartment. Reaching in, she held her breath before clasping her hand around a cylinder and pulling it out.

It was a lightsaber.

Rey stood slowly, testing the weight of the saber in her hand. It felt good. Right. It felt like Ben’s saber had felt when she fought Liita Ren on Starkiller. Rey rolled the saber from one hand to the other and back again, testing the weight and balance. She closed her eyes, breathing deep. This saber...it made something inside her settle. It made her feel...whole. She flicked it on and a steady green blade hummed to life.

Rey grinned. Unarmed? Not anymore.

Quickly, she raced back down the corridor and leapt from the door of the ship, by-passing the ramp completely and falling into a roll as she hit the ground. She came up swinging and the Stormtrooper in front of her dropped. Rey twirled up onto one knee and swung again, hitting the trooper that had been coming at her from the left with a swipe to the legs. She jumped up and ran, swinging at every trooper in her path. Ahead of her, Ben was locked in combat with Liita Ren. Rey took a moment to assess the situation, determined that Ben was holding his own just fine, and then turned back to the Stormtroopers in the clearing. With a snarling grin, Rey swiped at a trooper and hit another one with a kick to the back.

An enraged shout from Ren had her huffing out a laugh. She glanced over her shoulder to see Ben making jabbing little pokes in Ren’s direction, forcing the Darksider to stumble backward to avoid being hit. Trust Ben to toy with the bastard before cutting him down.

Rey skipped around a group of troopers coming at her from the right and hit the closest one in the shoulder, causing his arm to swing around as he was firing, hitting his comrades in the process. They went down in a jumble but Rey had already moved on to the next enemy, not stopping to watch her opponents fall. She pushed through a line of troopers shooting at her, wondering at the fact that none of them could manage to hit her, even though they were only a few feet away.

Stormtroopers. Couldn’t aim for shit.

Suddenly, she felt someone at her back. If the Force hadn’t told her it was Ben, the scent of him would have been enough to alert her.

“I thought I told you to go back to the ship!” He yelled at her over his shoulder.

Rey shrugged. “Because I was unarmed,” she hit a trooper in the chest, “now I’m not.”

She felt Ben turn just enough to glance at her over his shoulder.

“Wha..where did you get that?” He asked, irritated and not a little surprised.

“It was in your bag,” Rey huffed, slicing at another trooper, “it called to me.”

“It,” Ben stuttered, turning to her fully after beating back Ren with a Force push, “it called to you? What do you mean it called to you?”

Rey smirked. “It called to me. It,” she waved a hand around, then twisted her torso to the right and punched a trooper in the head, “it just called to me, you know? Your voice, but younger.”

Ben gawked at her. Rey had to admit he looked a little dumb with his mouth hanging open, saber skimming the ground as his arms hung loosely by his side. Dumb, but still cute. Rey couldn’t help herself. With a wink, she let loose a war cry and started swinging the saber again at the Stormtroopers and blaster shots aimed their way. Ben seemed to shake himself out of his stupor and joined her in the attack.

A scene, a flash, quick as lightning, behind her eyes and Rey called out, “Ben!”

Somehow, he knew, because a split second later, he leaned forward to hit a charging Ren and Rey leaned back with him, bracing her hand on his thigh while kicking out, hitting the trooper in front of her in the stomach and pushing him back, sending him stumbling into the group behind him. They all went to the ground.

Rey was breathing hard, sweat rolling down her neck. It seemed everywhere she turned, there were just more Stormtroopers waiting to meet the end of her blade. She huffed and puffed her way through nearly a dozen of them, ignoring the weariness in her step and the heaviness in her saber arm. When she looked up again, Ben was across the clearing once more and Litta Ren had him backed against the edge of the treeline. Quickly, Rey knocked out the rest of the troopers with a quick push of the Force, glad that she had been able to somewhat master at least that in Ben’s training. Then, she ran for Ben and Liita Ren. Ben was leading Ren on a chase through the trees and Rey scrambled to catch up.

Branches slapped across her face, scratching into her soft cheeks and ratcheting her ire up ten-fold. After everything that had happened, after already facing Ren once and finding out he had survived just to come after them again…

Rey blinked. The Ithorians. There was a barrier around the planet controlled by the main port of the Ithorians’ supra-atmospheric settlement. If the First Order had gotten through…

Rey glanced up, searching the patches of sky she could see through the trees. To the west, she saw it. A ball of fire in the sky. Rey narrowed her eyes. It was the main port, destroyed, she was sure of it. Fury rolled through her at the realization and she picked up speed.

Ben and Ren had stopped next to a cliff and were fighting again. Rey snarled, angry and vengeful, and leapt from the trees into the field of the cliff. At that moment, Ren managed a hit to Ben’s head with the butt end of his saber, bringing him down. He rolled down the slope and hit a tree, stopping. Still.

Rey cried out in shock, anger, fear. She ran at Ren, borrowed saber swinging. Ren turned on her, bringing his own saber up to block her unwieldy attacks.

“You,” he growled, eyes narrowed into slits.

“Me,” Rey sneered. A vision of Ben, fighting several beings in leather armor, came to her. Copying the Ben in her vision, she bent at the waist and twisted the saber in her hand so that the blade was angled behind her. 

She took a half step forward, jumped back and then lunged at Ren from the other side as he moved to meet her first, aborted, attack. She brought the saber back around in a backhand swipe, hitting Ren in the arm. He howled. Rey grinned. She danced back a few more steps, then twisted her wrist to bring the saber back around in her grip right side up and jabbed at Ren again, hitting him once more, this time in the thigh. Ren looked up at her, yellowed eyes glowing with hatred. Rey gulped as the Force swirled around them, thick and heavy and acidic.

She moved back, slowly and Ren stalked forward, twirling his saber in circles. Rey could feel his power now, barely restrained, as the Darkness hummed through him. It was the first sign that, perhaps, Ren was more powerful that she had first believed. He had beaten Ben, though Rey had a feeling that had more to do with Ben holding back than it did with Ren being stronger than him. Still. The first fight, she’d had the advantage of surprise and Ren already being injured. And, sure, she had trained with Ben some but barely a week of training compared to at least a decade or more of it? 

She was in way over her head.

Rey slowed her breaths, attempting to regain the sense of control she had felt when she first jumped into the fight. A quick glance toward Ben confirmed that he was still down for the count. She couldn’t tell if he was bleeding and hoped with everything in her that he was okay. Her little bout of inattention was enough, however, for Ren to strike. Rey cried out in pain as the blade of his gleaming red saber slid along her hip.

Rey stumbled back, swinging Ben’s saber wildly. Her breath huffed out of her, quick and short, and the pain from the burning cut raced through her head, making her dizzy. She stumbled to the left, away from another swing of Ren’s saber and flicked her eyes around the clearing, struggling to come up with something, a plan. Ren lashed out again. Rey jumped back. She narrowed her eyes at him.

_ “Stop, Rey,” _ she thought,  _ “this is just like any other fight. Just like any other opponent. Play your game. Make him spill his secrets and then use them against him.” _

Rey took measured steps then, leading Ren until they were circling one another. Quickly, she categorized: at least five or six inches taller than her, had about a hundred and fifty pounds on her too. Mostly muscle, clearly agile but not quick. He made up for that in throwing his body weight around. Rey flicked her eyes down to his legs. Even covered in his black pants, it was clear they were strong, made for jumping and running. It was his size that kept him from achieving speeds that the Cathar were known for, likely due to his human side. Cathar were generally smaller, leaner. Liita Ren may have looked mostly Cathar but had the height and build of a man.

Right.

“Well, as fun as this is, what say we make it a little more interesting?” Rey said.

Liita Ren growled. “I am going to kill you, girl, and I will enjoy it,” a slow, cruel grin spread over his fur covered mouth, “very, very much.”

Rey smiled, turned, and ran. She heard Ren let out a snarl behind her and give chase. As she ran back into the trees, Rey spared one more look toward Ben. She still didn’t see blood and she could still feel him, somehow. That knowledge alone kept her going.

Rey ran. She ran for so long the sun began it’s trek back down from skypeak. She ran for so long, she stopped hearing anything around her save her own stuttering breaths and the faint but gaining growls of Ren behind her. The terrain was difficult for him and he had to focus on not falling enough that he didn’t think to use the Force to bring her down. It was not so difficult that she was able to lose him, however, and so she kept going. Rey blinked back tears, racking her brain for something, anything. She had to get Ben back on the ship. She had to get them out of here.

So long as Ren was alive and able to fight, however, that wasn’t going to happen.

A thought came to her as she leapt over a small cut in the river she had been following for the past twenty minutes. She made a sharp turn back to the east and ran harder, pumping her legs like she never had before. She reached out and finally, finally, understood what Ben had been doing that day on Takodana, when he had followed her through the forest to her ship.

His ship, she supposed.

Using the Force to ease her way, Rey made excellent time back to the clearing where Ben lay. Ren had fallen back some, panting hard. Rey took the opportunity to check on Ben. She ran to where he lay, falling to her knees next to him and setting her now dormant saber next to her.

“Ben,” she whispered, laying a hand on his back. It moved, slowly but surely, and she closed her eyes in relief. Not dead then. “Ben, I really need your help. Please, Ben. Wake up. Don’t leave me.”

Tears fell. Ben didn’t wake.

Liita Ren made it to the clearing. Rey wiped her cheeks, grabbed her saber and stood. She ignited the blade and walked toward Ren. She had a plan. Half a plan. Well, not a plan really. More of a wing and a prayer. But she had no other ideas. Hoping she wasn’t about to get both her and Ben killed, Rey began to swing at Ren, goading him.

Predictably, he met her attacks fiercely and without hesitation. She led him on a merry chase around the field, inching ever closer to the edge of the cliff. A shuddering breath in calmed her and she struck out, hitting Ren’s blade head on and pushing back against him. The rock under her boots scraped as Ren pushed back. His superior strength made her slide along the ground, ever closer to the cliff. Rey swung her empty hand around and clocked Ren in the cheek, stunning him momentarily. He howled with rage and lunged at her.

This was it.

Rey jumped to the side just as Ren reached her, attempting to get out of the way, and kicked him in the side with every ounce of force she could muster before mentally slapping herself and using the Force to push him, sending him over the cliff edge.

Rey fell back on her bottom, breathing hard. Wanting to be sure Ren wasn’t coming back, she crawled to the edge and looked over. Suddenly, an arm covered in orange-brown fur lashed out, grasped her by the neck of her tunic and yanked. Rey screamed. She plummeted over the side, barely catching a glimpse of Ren’s smirking face as he scrambled back to safety before she closed her eyes in fear. She tried, she did, to use the Force to slow her descent, to catch hold of the rock next to her as she slammed into it over and over on her way down, but her terror overrode her ability to think clearly.

The last thing she knew was a sudden and overwhelming wave of Darkness piercing through the panicked fog in her mind. A Darkness so achingly familiar.

Then, she hit bottom and everything went black.

*****

Consciousness came back quickly. So quickly in fact, that the nausea that followed close behind was overwhelming in its intensity. Rolling over took more willpower than it should have but retching was all too easy. Bile rushed up the throat, sweat rolled down the back of the neck and he shuddered out a breath of relief once it was done.

Ben heard a scream and looked up just in time to see Rey go over the edge of the cliff.

Ben saw red. With a cry of dismay, he leapt to his feet, stumbling for a moment as a wave of dizziness nearly took him back to his knees. He reached down to grab his saber and found his holster empty. Shocked and still worried about Rey, Ben stumbled toward where Ren was standing, smirking down at something beyond the fall. Then, he turned to Ben, grin widening and showing off his sharp Cathar teeth.

“You’re little whore is dead,” he laughed. 

Ben’s stomach rolled. “No,” he whispered, yearning for it to be a lie but he could not feel Rey. That gentle light that he had been growing so used to was gone. “No!” He screamed. His vision grew dark, his mind a miasma of pain and fury.

He threw out an arm, calling his fallen saber to him and, without missing a beat, charged at Ren as the barrel smacked into his hand. Rage rolled through him, making his skin itch and feel too tight for his body. He lashed out with one hand, sending Ren careening into a tree where he hit with a sickening slam, his head ricocheting back into the yellow bark behind him. Ben closed his hand into a fist and yanked it back toward himself and Ren’s body followed. The Knight of Ren’s eyes were wide with fear and also a little wonder.

_ “Kill.” _ A voice whispered.  _ “Kill him. He stole her. He stole her from you, kill him!” _

Fire raced through Ben’s veins. He reached out and grabbed Ren by the throat, yanking him forward, so close that they could feel each other’s breaths on their faces. Ren struggled, pulling at Ben’s fist around his throat and kicking his legs, trying to get away. His saber that had fallen into the brush when he hit the tree would be of no help.

_ “Kill him, make his blood run. Make him pay. Make. Him. Suffer.” _

With sickening glee, Ben raised his saber. The Darkness rolling through him writhed in anticipation, euphoric and ready. Waiting to be completely unleashed. Ready to take root in his veins and never let go. But Ben wasn’t done playing yet. He flung Ren across the clearing once more, his body bouncing on the moss and rocks. He lay still for a moment, chest rising and falling quickly then climbed shakily to his feet only to be met with Ben standing right in front of him.

An inhuman scream erupted from his throat and he reached up to grasp his arm, only to touch blood. He staggered back and looked down. His right arm lay in the grass. Gasping, he looked back up at Ben. Ben smiled as Ren gulped in fear. He kicked out, catching the half-Cathar in the stomach and sending him flying back into the trees again. Branches snapped and fell to the ground as Litta Ren hit them. He finally came to a stop against the trunk of a particularly large Gothram tree. Once more, he forced himself to stand.

Through the murky haze of rage, Ben could see the Dark-sider weighing his options. In the end, he chose to fight and rushed at Ben. Ben felt his lips curl. He raised his hand again, palm facing the sky, and slowly closed it into a fist. Ren stopped suddenly, a few feet away, as though he had hit an invisible wall, and rose into the air. Gagging, he reached up with his remaining arm and scratched at his throat. Ben squeezed his fist tighter and Ren’s eyes rolled back into his head, veins pulsing beneath the pale orange of his skin. He tried to speak but only managed a few gargled noises.

Satisfaction, foul and fierce, unfurled through Ben. The darkness clouding his mind curled and coiled, growing stronger as Ben watched the life begin to leave Ren’s eyes. His blood beat with mad joy at the sight of this loathsome creature brought low by his hand.

_ “Ben.” _

His heart stuttered.

_ “Ben, please.” _

No. No this...this wasn’t right.

_ “You  _ **_are_ ** _ a monster.” _

No!

Ben sucked in a heaving breath and staggered back, releasing Ren from his hold. They both fell to the ground, Ren unconscious but not dead. Tears leaked from Ben’s eyes and he whimpered, doubling over and clutching at his chest over his heart. He felt sick, vile.

What had he done? What happened to him? How…how had he fallen to the Darkness? And so easily?

Who was that voice?

Rey!

Ben crawled to the cliff edge, nearly dragging himself through the dirt and rock, the moss streaking his pants with lines of greyish-blue. He was shaking, sweating, fear snaking through him along with the echo of the Darkness that had taken over him. He peered over the side of the cliff and saw Rey lying on an outcropping several feet below, still and pale. Heaving in a gasp of air, Ben began to cry harder.

“Rey!” He screamed. “Rey!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***from the perspective of someone who isn't fully in their own head. Yes, I'm talking about Ben. I hope I was able to convey just how completely lost and overtaken he was by the Darkness during his last fight with Liita Ren.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed and I promise I will not be waiting another month to post again.


	9. A Calling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See? I promised! I promised it wouldn't be another month before I posted and here I am!
> 
> Also, I have about 20 individual FanFiction story folders on my Drive right now, screaming at me to get to writing and there are two, beside this Eosphora, that won't leave me alone. I was up until four this morning finishing the next chapter after this one AND writing the first three chapters for another story that, as of this posting, I have almost finished. I will likely be uploading the first chapter of that story tomorrow and, since it will be completely written by that point, I will continue to upload a new chapter for that story every couple of days. The working title is Witch Ben is an Idiot. Clearly, that is not a good title, however accurate it may be. It's probably been harder thinking of what to call the damn thing than it has been writing it...
> 
> Note on this chapter: there is a new character early on for whom I could not help but read their lines in the voice of a certain Mandalorian character from season 1 and it left me laughing until I cried. Fake cookies for whoever laughs along with me, lol.
> 
> Finally, thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone reading, commenting and leaving kuddos. It really keeps me driven to know that you guys are enjoying this. Thank you! To those who have subscribed either to the story or to me, I am in a zone right now and expect to be writing a lot more and a lot more quickly. There are quite a few stories I am itching to get out. I hope you check them out!

Ben wiped at his eyes, furiously scrubbing the tears away while looking for a way down the cliffside to Rey. Deciding that, perhaps, he would have to get creative, Ben called his saber to him and lit it. Gripping the shaft with both hands, he raised it up over his head and then brought it swiftly down until the blade was buried in the rock on the side of the fall. Then, he swung himself down and around until he hung by the hilt against the rock. Slowly, he pumped his arms and the saber cut through the rock, allowing him to slide down to the outcropping where Rey lay, still unconscious. Bracing his feet against the rockface allowed Ben to push against the steady slide of his blade, ensuring he didn’t fall too quickly. What seemed like hours later but could only have been minutes, he touched down.

Carefully, he pulled his saber from the stone and extinguished it. Then, he turned to Rey.

Her face was ashen, unnaturally so, and Ben feared the worst. Gently, he knelt next to her and reached out into the Force. For a moment, all was empty, still, then, he felt her. It was there, pale and shaky; her light. Ben sighed in relief. She was still alive. Barely.

“Ben!”

Ben jolted. He looked up toward where he had heard the voice and saw his father standing on the cliff edge, looking down on them.

“Dad!” He called, ignoring his own surprise at his father’s presence. “Help me! Rey’s unconscious and I can’t move her back up on my own!”

Han nodded and turned away from him, shouting at someone behind him, then he looked back down at Ben.

“Chewy’s gonna get the Falcon and bring her around, ramp down. He’ll keep her steady so you can carry Rey on board.”

Ben nodded and then returned his attention to Rey. Her eyelids fluttered and it was like a stab in the heart. Ben wept, openly, not caring that his father or Chewy might see. He wept for Rey and he wept for himself.

What had happened to him?

Ben took Rey’s hand in his and closed his eyes. He could see it then, the strange vision he’d had while fighting Ren. A literal strange vision. It was almost as though he’d had something over his face. No, covering his entire head. A mask. More. A helmet. One with slits to see through that caused his vision to be narrowed and dark. And the noise! It had sounded like he was breathing inside of a vestar tube, echoing and wrong.

Ben shuddered. So wrong and yet so, so disturbingly familiar.

He heard the Falcon seconds before Chewy dropped her down in front of him. He gathered Rey into his arms, making sure her saber...his training saber...was attached to her belt. Carefully, he walked them both to the loading ramp and stepped aboard. The moment he had her inside, he made for the captain’s quarters. He felt as though he was walking in a maze, the kind at the carnivals they had on Chandrila, that moved side to side and up and down as you made your way through. He stumbled, feeling drunk.

“Hey, kid,” he heard a soft voice beside him and a strong hand landed on his shoulder, “let me help you.”

Ben growled and clutched Rey closer to his chest. Then, he blinked and shook his head.

“Sorry, dad,” he whispered, “something...something is wrong with me.”

Han just nodded and guided Ben to the cabin and helped him lay Rey on the bed.

“Coruscant is closer than anywhere else,” Han said once Ben had taken his place by Rey’s side, sitting stiffly and holding her hand once more, “we can take her to the healers there...and turn Ren in to the authorities.”

Ben winced at that. He turned his head away, unable to look his father in the eyes.

“Yeah,” Han sighed, “I saw it. Not all of it, just from where you lopped the guy’s arm off.” He nudged Ben in the chin with his knuckles, forcing the younger man to finally look at him. “I also saw you stop yourself from killing him.” He finished with a pointed look.

Ben closed his eyes. “I shouldn’t have had to stop myself, dad. I shouldn’t have been acting like that at all. I don’t...I don’t understand. I don’t know what happened to me.”

Han sighed again. He walked a few feet over toward the head of the bed and leant against the wall next to it. With tired eyes, he looked his son over. Rolling his chin, clearly parsing through what to say, he eventually slapped a half-hearted smirk on his face.

“Well,” he said, false joviality in his tone, “can’t say I blame you, going bantha-shit on the guy that you thought killed your girl. I’d have done the same if it were your mother.”

Ben snorted. His father, ladies and gentlemen, the master of joking around when things get too serious. But Ben couldn’t get angry with him for it. The look on his father’s face, it was worried but also...also a little relieved. Ben wondered what that could mean, if it meant anything at all.

“Get some sleep, kid,” Han slapped him on the shoulder as he passed by on the way out the door, “we’ll be on Coruscant in a few hours.”

With that, he was gone and Ben and Rey were alone. Ben breathed in, deeply, then let the air out slowly. And then, he did it again. And again. And once more. Feeling slightly more grounded, he turned his attention to Rey. A cursory look-over and he decided the worst of her injuries was probably her head. It was bleeding slightly and he knew she must have hit it hard upon landing. Reaching out, he slid his fingers gently along her hairline to her temple. Then, he closed his eyes and began to heal her as best he could.

He knew, though, that it wouldn’t be enough. They needed to get to Coruscant, fast.

*****

Ben awoke some time later, body aching and head pounding. He checked over Rey and found her still knocked out but felt immeasurably better about her chances after seeing to the cut on the back of her head. Knowing he needed to get some water in him, he rolled up from the floor and pulled on his boots. He stood awkwardly next to Rey’s bed for a moment, considering, and then leaned down, sliding his lips over her forehead in a sweet caress. Then, face red, he left.

The lounge was empty when he arrived so he took a mug from the shelf, poured some water in it and headed for the cockpit. Inside, Han and Chewy were arguing about the best place to take Ren: Han thought they should take him to the Jedi temple and let them deal with him, Chewy thought he should just rip off his other arm and then throw him out of the airlock.

Ben sort of agreed with Chewy but the thought only made him ill when he remembered why Ren only had one arm remaining to begin with. Were it not for the fact that his saber had cartorized the wound while making it, Ren would already have bled out. As evil as the Darksider was, Ben didn’t want his life on his conscience. He didn’t want anyone’s life on his conscience.

Ben cleared his throat, causing his father and furry uncle to end their debate and turn to him.

“Hey,” Ben said.

Han grinned at him and waved him over.

“How did you know?” Ben asked, finally putting voice to the question that had arisen the moment he saw Han on Ithor. “How did you know where we were, that we needed help?”

Chewy let out a series of growls and grunts.

“Chewy’s right,” Han said, “we heard the mayday from the Ithorian’s home-base or whatever and were in the area so we headed over to see if we could help. When they told us you were on the planet,” Han shrugged, “well, not gonna leave my only son to fend for himself, now am I?”

He smirked, proudly puffing up his chest as though he had just announced he had been the one to blow up the Death Star and not Ben’s Uncle Luke.

Ben rolled his eyes. He knew what that posture meant. Han had been terrified. For him. He grinned back at his dad.

“You never could let anyone else have all the fun and leave you out of it, could you?”

(Thanks, dad).

“Never!” Han winked.

(Love you, kid).

“Rabble-rouser.” Ben replied.

(Love you too, old man).

*****

After reaching Coruscant, Ben went with Rey to the Senate healing center. He knew that they would take her, if only because of who he was. Han and Chewy, having decided the Jedi were, in fact, the best choice, escorted the still wounded but very much awake and in pain Ren to the Jedi Temple. Ben knew he probably should have gone with them but Rey...Rey was more important. She was more important than anything.

Once they arrived, however, Ben was left to pace on wobbly legs in the waiting area after the healers had wheeled Rey back into the surgery rooms. He finally collapsed into a chair after nearly colliding with a wall. Head in his hands, he waited.

*****

“Your Highness?”

A voice startled Ben awake. He jumped from his prone position, laying somewhat haphazardly across a bank of chairs, and sat up. The healer in front of him gifted him with an understanding and calm smile.

“Your friend…” she began.

Ben stopped her.

“Rey, her name is Rey,” he said, “she’s my...she’s…” he huffed out a laugh, “she’s Rey.”

The healer’s smile gentled even further and Ben realized she wasn’t human. If her shimmery, silvery skin had not been a clue, her long, silky, pale blue hair certainly was. The soft lavender of her eyes cemented it for him and a deep breath brought with it the expected scent of parra-mint and zeebee honey. She was a Zalra, a race of empaths.

“Rey,” she said, voice gentle and calming, “did very well in surgery. You helped, quite a bit, with your own healing.” She gave Ben a knowing look.

He flushed and looked down at his hands, clasping them between his knees as he leaned forward.

“I did what I could,” he said, then continued, self-deprecation coloring his voice, “but I’ve never been particularly apt at Force healing so I know it wasn’t much.”

The Zalra, Emli according to her name-plate, snorted. Ben was shocked to hear such an inelegant sound from such a genteel species.

“I assure you, Your Highness,” she responded, a note of stern finality in her tone, “she would be dead were it not for what you did to heal her.”

The idea, the very thought of Rey anything but alive left Ben feeling sick. Emli reached out and settled three long, slender fingers to hover over his shoulder. Immediately, his nausea passed and a sense of peace flowed over him. He looked up and nodded at her gratefully.

“Can I see her?” He asked. He cringed at the longing he could hear in the question.

Emli tipped her head at him and bid him to follow her. They walked down the hall and through a set of doors marking the area “Restricted”. A few feet in, Emli turned left and then right. Ben followed like an unwieldy, lumbering shadow. Emli stopped in front of a single door, the only one on the corridor.

“This room is the same we would have given you, were you our patient,” she said.

Ben understood what she meant. The room was not only completely private, it was also heavily guarded, no doubt by cameras and guards waiting, just out of sight, to come to aid at a moment’s notice. Emli keyed a code into the panel next to the door, then gestured for Ben to place his hand on the scanner.

“You are one of only three with access to her room,” she said, “I am the second and Dr. Myaree is the third. He will be along soon to bring you up to date on Lady Rey’s condition and care.”

Ben thanked her softly, then stepped inside the room. Rey lay inside a bacta tank, only her face and one hand visible. The rest of her body was hidden by the thick gel of the bacta. The sight left Ben feeling unmoored. He staggered over to her.

“Rey,” he whispered. “Oh, sweetheart, I’m so sorry. This is all my fault.”

He reached out and placed a hand on the glass of the tank, wishing he could touch her face. He watched her, listening to the beeps and whirrs of the bacta tank as it measured her heart-rate, breathing and other vitals. She did not look at peace, as people so often claimed the unconscious did. No, her brow was wrinkled and her nose scrunched. It was the same face she made when Ben was trying to teach her something and she just wasn’t getting it. Ben’s heart flipped over in his chest. Rey was dreaming. She must be. The subtle change of her expression from confused to understanding only cemented the thought in his head. He ached to brush against her mind, to see what she was experiencing, but he didn’t dare. He wasn’t even sure if he could without being able to get close to her skin.

The sound of the door opening behind him had him turning to greet the doctor. Years of lessons from his grandmother on maintaining a stoic facade in the face of shocking turns of event was the only thing that kept Ben from crying out in surprise. Before him stood a very short, very round being.

Ben had never seen an Ugnaught healer before. Actually, he had never seen Ugnaught as anything but mechanics and welders.

“Ugnaughts specialize in maintenance and repair,” the being said, as though he could hear Ben’s thoughts and sought to respond to them, “why not the maintenance and repair of beings instead of machines? Or, perhaps, beings are machines. Fleshy machines.”

Ben couldn’t help it. He threw his head back and laughed.

“I’d never thought of it that way,” he admitted, “but you aren’t wrong. You must be Dr. Myaree.”

The being nodded and moved closer. He tapped the screen showing Rey’s chart and opened a series of files.

“Your lady is quite strong, indeed,” Dr. Myaree said in that slow, matter-of-fact manner that his race was well known for, “that will be good for bearing your offspring later.” He gave Ben a long once over, no doubt taking in his undeniably enormous size. “For her sake, that is fortuitous.”

Ben stuttered. His face warmed and his ears burned.

“Oh, um, no...that’s not...I don’t…”

Dr. Myaree waved a hand at him, silencing his embarrassed protests.

“You healed her well,” the doctor continued, “you should be proud to have cared for your mate so diligently. You have proven yourself worthy to sire her children.”

Ben gawked. Then, he narrowed his eyes as the Ugnaught turned from him, tiny smirk gracing his mouth.

The little healer was toying with him!

“Her repairs went well,” Myaree said and Ben stifled a laugh at the term, “and she will heal quickly in this bacta. Two weeks.”

Ben sucked in a deep breath. Two weeks. It would take Rey two weeks to fully heal.

“Okay,” he nodded, resigned to having to wait so long to see Rey’s lovely hazel eyes once more. “What can I do to help her? Is there anything?”

The doctor looked up at Ben.

“Ugn,” he grunted, then stepped around Ben and circled to the end of the bed. He pulled a knob and pushed a couple of buttons. The bacta in the tank began to cycle: out with the old, in with the new. “Talk to her. She will hear you. She will want to come back to her mate.”

Ben gave a weak grin. “Okay, talk to her, I can do that.”

*****

As it turned out, talking to her was easier said than done. Ben sat next to her for nearly an hour, silent. He didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know where to start. If he had just taken Ren out when he had the chance, if he hadn’t been trying to wear him out, wear him down, if he had just...He wanted to apologize but he knew he had to wait to do that once she was awake and really able to hear him. So, what then? Should he bring up the weather? Comment on the most recent pod races? Regale her with a fairytale as his grandmother used to do to get him to go to bed?

Wearily, Ben sighed. He ran a hand over his face and then just stared and stared some more. Rey’s face had gone from that understanding look to the one she made when she was listening carefully. Ben wondered, once more, what in the stars she could be dreaming about.

*****

Rey groaned. Her head was pounding and her body felt sluggish, weighed down. She opened her eyes slowly, wincing as the light in the room pierced through the fog over...something. She took a deep breath in. The sticky sweet yet pungent scent of her environment raced into her lungs and she coughed. Bacta. She was inside a bacta tank. She huffed. Attempting to turn her head and figure out where she was proved impossible. She tried lifting her arms but couldn’t. She tried shifting her legs. They refused to obey.

Panic set in.

“Shh.”

Rey froze. She turned her eyes to the right. Nothing. She turned them to the left. In the corner of her eye, she saw a figure standing next to the bacta tank.

“Why don’t we go for a walk?” The voice said.

Rey frowned. Go for a walk? She couldn’t even move!

In what seemed to be the blink of an eye, Rey found herself standing outside of the bacta tank. She looked down. Though she knew she had been naked in the tank, she was wearing a simple white robe now. She looked up and found a man standing before her.

“Shall we?” He asked her, offering his arm to her.

Cautiously, Rey laid a hand on his forearm and nodded. With the first step they took, the healing room melted away and they were standing in a dark, smoky somewhere.

“Where are we?” She turned to look at the man. “How did we get here? Who are you?”

The man smiled at her and, in spite of everything, Rey felt herself relax. He had kind eyes, this man, kind and gentle but there was a heavy intelligence behind them. The intelligence borne of seeing far more than any person had a right to see. Rey looked away from him and took in their surroundings. An endless, hazy darkness spread out before her. There was something familiar about it, as familiar as “nothing” could be and yet she could not fathom what was happen…

She sucked in a deep breath.

“I’m,” Rey’s voice wavered and she shrank in on herself. “I’m dead, aren’t I?”

She closed her eyes, fighting the tears attempting to fall. A thought occurred to her.

“Oh stars, Ben!” Rey whirled in front of the man and grasped the edges of the robes he was wearing, the rough, cream fabric scratching against her fingers. “Is Ben okay, did he survive?”

The man outright grinned at her.

“You aren’t dead, Rey,” he said, patting the back of one of her hands. “And Ben is just fine.”

She let go and stepped back, looking around again before narrowing her eyes at him.

“Where am I?” She asked once more. “And who are you?”

Rey looked him over. His long, sandy hair, streaked with grey, was pinned half up and the rest of his locks flowed over his shoulders past his neatly trimmed beard. The robes he wore were familiar, as though she had seen them in a dream.

“You...are you a Jedi? Or one of Skywalker’s Order?” She asked.

“I was a Jedi,” the man said.

“Was?” Rey shook her head and stepped back a few more steps. “I thought you said I wasn’t dead.”

The man chuckled.

“I am, sort of,” he shrugged, “you are not.” He gestured for them to walk. “I am Qui-Gon Jinn. I was once a Jedi and now, I am one with the Force.”

Rey breathed in shakily. “So, if you aren’t dead, how are you here? And where...where is here? Please,” she stepped in front of him again, eyes pleading, “what is going on?”

Qui-Gon laid a gentle hand on her shoulder and nudged her into walking once more.

“You are dreaming,” he responded, “a lucid, living dream but a dream nonetheless. I am here because you called for aid and I was fortunate enough to hear you.”

“I called for aid?” Rey was even more confused.

“When you fell,” he replied, “your spirit cried out for help.”

Rey felt her eyes narrow again.

“Yeah, help to stop myself from falling! From hitting the ground and I…” she gulped, memories surfacing, “and I remember hitting the ground. So, not much help, were you?”

Qui-Gon chuckled again and it made something in Rey burn.

“You think this is funny?” She shouted, ripping away from him.

Qui-Gon sighed. “No. No what I find amusing is the fact that you think that your fall was what you were asking for help with.” Rey frowned but fell back into step with him. “You were not asking for someone to help save you.”

Rey rolled her eyes. This guy. Could he not finish a thought or did he enjoy making people wait?

“Think Rey,” he urged, “what was on your mind at that moment? What were you most concerned with?”

She opened her mouth to say, ‘not dying’ but closed it just as quickly. Her mind raced. Her biggest concern?

“Ben,” she finally answered, “I was most concerned about Ben. I didn’t...I didn’t know if he was okay. I didn’t know what would happen to him while he was unconscious and Ren was still walking around, able to hurt him.”

Qui-Gon nodded and moved his arms to clasp his hands behind his back.

“Why?” He asked.

Rey’s eyes narrowed again.

“Excuse me? Why did I worry for Ben? Why do I care about him?” She snapped, just about done with this man and his infuriating…

“Yes,” he interrupted her train of thought. “Why? Why were you more concerned about Ben in the moment you thought you might die than you were about yourself?” Qui-Gon stopped walking and turned to her, pale blue eyes serious. “Why did you feel that Ben was more important than anyone or anything else in the galaxy from practically the moment you met him?”

Rey’s mouth opened and closed several times as she parsed through Qui-Gon’s questions. How had he known? Even more, why was he right? Why was Ben so important? Why did she…

“I don’t know,” she whispered, unable to meet Qui-Gon’s stare.

He nodded at her and they began to walk again. The misty darkness faded and Rey gasped in delight at the scene in front of her. Green. So much green. Fields of green and red and orange and purple surrounded by beautiful bright blue waterfalls.

“Where are we?” She breathed.

“Naboo,” Qui-Gon said. He lifted a hand and pointed to Rey’s right. “And that is Varykino, the family home of the Naberrie family, Padmé’s family.”

Rey looked. The stately home rose out of the surrounding fields, banking a beautiful river. It was enchanting, lovely. Rey knew it. She had seen it before.

“I knew Padmé.” Qui-Gon said, “ My Padawan and I had been assigned to find out who was behind the blockage happening at Naboo. The Queen decided that she needed to speak to the Senate in person and we agreed to guard her on her way there. Through a series of...mishaps, we landed on Tatooine and that, my dear, is where we all met Anakin Skywalker.”

Rey blinked in surprise but said nothing.

“He was just a boy, then,” he continued. “But I knew. I knew who he was. I knew what he could be. What he was meant to be.”

Rey waited, quietly. This was not one of Qui-Gon’s figure-it-out-yourself silences, this was him trying to determine how best to tell her his story.

“There was a prophecy,” he murmured, “I thought I understood it, but I know now that prophecies are not what they first appear. The Force was in turmoil. It had been for decades, perhaps even longer. I believed that Anakin would be the one to reunite the Force and heal the ravages that had been tearing it apart for so long.”

“You don’t think he did?” Rey questioned. She knelt and plucked one of the bright violet flowers from its stalk and toyed with it. “Did he not break away from the Jedi and form a new Order? One focused on the Force as a whole?”

Qui-Gon gave her a small smile. Rey lifted the flower to her nose: it was sweet, as flowers are, but there was a bold, underlying spice to the scent that left her craving more.

“Not in the way I had thought he would,” he admitted, “and not completely. He was...he has done well, preparing at least one of the true uniters of the Force but I worry it is not enough. The last time…”

Qui-Gon was quiet so long, Rey wondered if he was even aware he had stopped speaking.

“The last time,” she asked, hoping to get him talking again.

“Not the last time,” he said, looking at her with a strange and unsettling light in his eye, “the First Time. The first time, Anakin fell. Not just to the Darkness but to the most evil and loathsome parts of it.”

Rey fell back in shock.

“I’m sorry, what?” She blinked up at Qui-Gon from her place in the grass. He knelt before her, hands clasped and eyes downturned.

“The first time, the first timeline, Anakin fell,” he repeated, “he became a Sith Lord. He became Darth Vader and, in doing so, he doomed his children and his grandson.”

Rey shook her head, alternately closing her eyes and opening them to stare at the waterfalls and flowers around her.

“I’m…” she swallowed, “I’m sorry, I don’t understand what you are saying. Anakin Skywlaker left the Jedi and formed a new Order. He is considered the most powerful Force user in the Galaxy and one of the most brilliant. He is no Sith.”

Qui-Gon gave her a bitter smile.

“No, not this time. The first time.” He responded.

Rey thought that over, turning the words in her mind until she could only come to one conclusion.

“Are...are you saying that this is an alternate timeline? That another timeline existed before this one?”

Qui-Gon nodded, somehow looking both proud and worried at once.

“Anakin and Padmé were given a chance, an opportunity to see the future as it was if Anakin continued on the path he was taking. He changed course because of what he saw and so time was reset and this future is what resulted from it.” He said softly. “You have had dreams, visions.”

It wasn’t a question and Rey felt ill at the implications.

“They weren’t dreams and visions,” she said, voice trembling, “they were, are, memories.”

“Yes.”

Rey gasped out a breath, tears coming hot. She did nothing to stop them.

“In...in my visions, memories...Ben…” she looked up at Qui-Gon, practically begging him to negate what she already knew to be true.

“He was obsessed with his grandfather, with Darth Vader,” Qui-Gon answered, not unkindly, “and he was alone and afraid. He thought that if he was able to take up the mantle that Vader had left behind upon his death, that he might be able to...that he might have value.”

Rey gagged in revulsion but her heart ached. She knew. As Qui-Gon spoke the words, Rey knew that Ben’s loneliness and fear and self-loathing were the result of a life of being ignored and feared and hated. She knew him. Perhaps she knew him even better than she knew herself.

“So Ben,” Rey swallowed, “and me. What...the dreams...sorry, the memories, they’ve shown me that, even then, he was important to me. More so than anything else, but I don’t know why.”

Qui-Gon reached out a hand and, when Rey took it, he pulled her to her feet.

“You must open yourself to him, and he to you,” he said, “otherwise, you will never be able to become what you were meant to be.” He frowned. When he looked back at Rey, there was a resolve in his face that she didn’t like. “What you were born to be.” He finished, as though the words pained him.

“You mean, like destiny?” Rey asked, feeling nauseous.

“I don’t know if I believe in destiny anymore,” he said, “but I cannot deny that you and Ben…”

Rey held her breath. Qui-Gon gave her one last, knowing look.

“You and Ben were, quite literally, made for each other. The question now is, are you prepared for what that means?”

*****

Ben scowled as he moved down the street. The walk from the Senate healing center to the Jedi Temple was not a long one but the crowds that littered the walkways were heavier than he liked and he was starting to wish he had called a speeder to pick him up. He had thought the fresh air and exercise would do him some good after three days of sitting by Rey’s bacta tank. Waiting. Now, he just wanted to be at his destination, away from other people and out of the hot, dry air.

Finally, the Temple loomed above him, a gleaming spectre of white stone and pretentious grandeur.

Ben didn’t care for the Temple, or for the Jedi as a whole, if he was honest. There was something about their self-importance that grated on him. The fact that it used to be far worse, according to his grandfather and Obi-Wan, well…

Ben shook his head. Anakin was with the Ithorians, helping them in the aftermath of Ren’s attack. Uncle Luke and Obi-Wan were with him and his mother was currently working with his dad, Chewy and Uncle Lando to figure out how Ren had been able to breach the barrier the Ithorians had around their base and their planet.

Ben needed answers and, unfortunately, that left only one being who could possibly provide them.

“Welcome, you are, Ben Solo,” an old yet strong voice greeted him as he bounced up the steps of the temple.

Ben looked up. Master Yoda was standing on the landing in front of the entryway, hunched over his cane and looking far too ancient for Ben’s liking. Ben may not have cared for the Jedi but he respected them and this Jedi more than most. Ben did not know how old Yoda was, no one did, perhaps not even Yoda himself these days, but the thought of the little Jedi Master nearing the end of his life left a sour churning in Ben’s gut.

“Thank you, Master Yoda,” Ben replied, nodding.

When he reached Yoda, the two turned and entered the Temple.

“Questions, you have,” Yoda said as they moved down the arched corridor toward the meditation rooms. “Answers, you seek. Hold them, you believe I do.”

Ben sighed. Ah, yes. This is what he was willing to subject himself to. Hours, perhaps several, of listening to Yoda’s strange speech patterns and having to parse out what he was saying.

And what he wasn’t saying.

“Yes, Master Yoda,” he replied. “My grandfather has long hinted that there is something I need to know but he has, so far, been reluctant to tell me. Indeed, my whole family has behaved this way for as long as I can remember.”

They reached the meditation rooms and Yoda slipped inside one of them, not his usual, preferred spot, Ben could tell. No, it was clear that the small Jedi had chosen this room for Ben’s comfort, for it was large and held many equally large seats and cushions for beings his size. Yoda hoisted himself onto one such pillow and Ben stifled a grin at how adorable Yoda looked on the huge, blue pouf. From the frown on Yoda’s face, he did not succeed in hiding his amusement. Ben chose to save face and settled down across from the Jedi on another pillow.

“Do you know, Master Yoda?” Ben asked, deciding to simply get to the point rather than allow Yoda to piddle around the issue until he could no longer ignore it. “Do you know what my family is hiding from me? Do you know why?”

Yoda considered him for a time. Ben waited. He knew this game. He had played it often enough with his grandfather, much to his consternation. Ben was not a patient man, though he did try.

“A ripple, a change,” Yoda stated, “Time is and time was. Then, it was not and is again.”

Ben blinked. He sat motionless for several minutes, attempting to wrap his mind around what Yoda had said.

“I’m sorry, what?” He asked when he could no longer stand the stalemate.

“Hmm,” Yoda hummed, then he closed his eyes, “meditate we will.”

Be started to protest but the glare Yoda sent him had his mouth snapping shut instantly. He huffed and closed his eyes.

He drifted in silence, no visions and no dreams. There was nothing but it was not nothing, it was something. He floated in it, content but anxious. He tried to reach out, feel the Force. He felt nothing and he felt everything. His stomach began to roll and a piercing headache formed behind his brow so he backed away, reigning in his Force signature until he was drifting once more.

Some time later, he felt Yoda’s Force signature stir. Though it was difficult, far more-so than he thought it should have been, Ben pulled himself from the nothing and opened his eyes. He knew what Yoda was going to say before the words even formed on his lips.

“Seek out Padmé, you must.”

*****

Ben loved the Senate building. It had stood strong for nearly a thousand years, though not unchanged. As the years and decades and then centuries had gone by, the Senate itself had changed and so, too, did the building that housed it. Now, it was a mish-mash of different styles from various time periods that, somehow, managed to still look like the whole thing had been built all at one time by one architect with one cohesive vision. It was an organized mess and Ben loved it.

He strolled through the halls without paying attention to the direction of his feet. Time and practice proved old friends here and he was able to focus on other things as he paced toward his grandmother’s offices.

Things like danger.

Ben was not stupid. Not by any means. Though the First Order and the Senate were enemies, he had no doubts that there were First Order sympathizers within the Senate ranks. His grandparents believed the same and it would do no good to pretend that, even here, there was no danger. An assassination attempt would be all too easy, and all too useful to the First Order. He could feel the eyes of several beings following him as he walked but none emitted outright hostility; there was envy, irritation and even, disturbingly, lust, but no hostility. He reached the doors to his grandmother’s offices without issue and nodded to the guards, members of his grandfather’s Order, as he went inside.

“My darling, what are you doing away from Rey!” His grandmother exclaimed as she eased herself from her seat behind the elegant silver and glass desk she sat behind.

Ben went to her and leaned down for a hug, allowing himself a moment to breathe his grandmother in. She was his rock, his biggest supporter and his favorite (though he never said as much aloud). Her very presence left him feeling calmer and more at peace than almost anything.

Rey, really, was the only exception.

“I could not stay there and just...just watch her lying in that blasted tank, unmoving,” he replied, “I needed to get out, if only for a little while.”

Padmé smiled at him and pulled him toward the seating area she had set up near the large balcony doors at the other end of her office. Ben sat and waited while she ordered tea from the page that had been assigned to her. Once the tea was served, Padmé sent Ben an unimpressed look.

“I highly doubt you would leave her for anything other than an absolute emergency,” she stated, “so why don’t you stop lying to me and tell me why you are here?”

Ben gulped. He sat his tea and clasped his hands, choosing to look at them rather than into his grandmother’s eyes.

“I…” he stopped, unsure of how to ask what he wanted to ask. He had been here before, after all, though not with her. He had asked his parents, his grandfather, his uncles...but he had never asked Padmé. Ben frowned. Why? Why hadn’t he asked her? “Not an emergency,” he said instead, “but important, very much so.”

He looked up at Padmé and she had paled. She knew, he thought. She knew why he was here.

“Please, grandmother, please tell me,” he was begging, unashamedly, “what have you, all of you, been keeping from me all this time? And what does it have to do with Rey?”

Padmé sighed but color had returned to her cheeks and so Ben knew she was, at least a little, relieved that he had asked her. When she did not speak, he continued.

“I went to see Yoda. I thought he might have answers for me.”

Padmé looked up sharply at that. “And what did he say?”

Ben pursed his lips. “He said ‘Time is and time was. Then, it was not and is again.’” He wrinkled his nose at the confusing statement. “And then he said we should meditate. Once we had, he said that I needed to come to you.”

Padmé looked away from him. She seemed to be staring at nothing through the open balcony doors. The light from the early evening sun cast a glow upon her that took years off her face. Ben’s heart clinched.

Yoda wasn’t the only one that was older than Ben cared to admit.

“What do you think he meant?” Padmé asked and she looked back at Ben.

Ben sat back on the overly plush sofa. He worried his mouth as he thought over the words.

Time is and time was.

Then, it was not and is again.

Ben shook his head.

“Time travel?” He asked, the ludicrous thought making him want to laugh. “No, sorry, that’s absurd.”

Padmé wasn’t laughing.

Ben stared at her. She raised an eyebrow. He stared some more. Shakily, he reached out and took his teacup in hand, the tiny porcelain cup swallowed by his large fingers. He took a sip, choked on it as he tried to swallow around the lump in his throat, and set the tea back down. He dabbed at the small splash that had landed on his chin. Then, he cocked a half-assed smirk at his grandmother.

“Very funny. Time travel. Right.”

Padmé took up her own tea, eyes closing as she took an elegant sip and gently placed the cup back onto the matching saucer. When she opened her eyes, Ben could tell that she was wholly and completely serious.

“Time travel,” he breathed, unable to comprehend, unable to accept…

“Time travel,” Padmé confirmed. “Specifically, your grandfather and myself, though you as well for a spin, and Rey. And your mother. A version of her, anyway.”

“Wha…” Ben coughed into his fist, trying to stop himself from having a full-on panic attack.

Padmé sighed. She leaned forward and placed her tea on the table and then folded her hands into her lap.

“Ben,” she said and he looked up at her, eyes watering, “darling boy, what is it?”

Ben’s mind raced. Time travel. If time travel was real...if his grandparents had time travelled but he and Rey had as well...and his mother…

“What do you mean by ‘a version” of mom?” He asked.

Padmé smiled gently. “The oldest version that I met, to be sure. Goodness, she might have been nearly 60!”

Ben gawked.

“And...and you said...she time traveled as well?” Be sucked in a breath. “As did I? As did Rey?”

Padmé nodded. “It seems, my little prince, that the time for honesty is long past.” She moved, then, and seated herself beside him, looking altogether miniscule next to him. She took one of his hands in hers. “It is time to tell you about the first timeline, what we know about it anyway, and about what we did, what your grandfather did, to ensure it never came to be.”

Ben swallowed and sucked a labored breath in. He nodded.

“Ben,” Padmé said, voice heavy with caution and not a little pain, “you need to understand, before I begin, that what I tell you will be more than difficult to hear. It will be agony. You will suffer, my sweet boy.” Tears pooled in her eyes and Ben reached up to wipe them away.

“Tell me,” he said, firm and sure.

With sadness in her voice, Padmé began to speak.


End file.
